The Silent Why

#027. Sadly, the UK loses about 70 to 80 veterans to suicide every year, over one a week, and in the US the statistics are significantly higher, with multiples lives lost per day. Such an important topic needs talking about, so in this episode we chat to former soldier Shaun 'Johno' Johnson from London.
Loss #20 of 101 - Loss of veterans to suicide.

Shaun is no stranger to loss. When he was just six years old, his mum died while she was giving birth to his sister. Shaun and his siblings were left with a military dad who, himself, struggled to cope with the death of his young wife.
Years later Shaun followed the familiar footsteps into the military but was discharged with a crush injury 12 years into his intended 22-year career. Another loss. Sadly, Shaun was ill-prepared for his sudden return to Civvy Street, spiralling down and down until a failed attempt to end his own life,. This is sadly not a unique story for military veterans.

However, after a further loss - this time of his dad - and then falling in love with his wife, Shaun chose to regain control of his life, deciding it was worth fighting for. Since then he has dedicated loads of energy to family life, art, music and supporting veterans as they leave the military. He now works for The Poppy Factory and, having lost three ex-military friends in 18 months to suicide, is passionate about raising awareness of the suicide rates among veterans.
To find out more about Shaun visit:
https://twitter.com/Shaun5195
https://twitter.com/OnParadeUK
https://www.youtube.com/OnParadeUK
https://www.shaunjohnson.org

If you need someone to talk to, the Samaritans are always available by phoning 116 123 or by texting ‘SHOUT’ to 85258.
And the National Suicide Prevention Helpline is available on: 0800 689 5652 (UK) or 1-800-273-8255 (US).

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More about the hosts, our childless journey, photos of guests, blog, and official 101 losses list: thesilentwhy.com
What's a Herman? - thesilentwhy.com/herman
Tips on how to help and talk to griefy people: thesilentwhy.com/post/howtotalktothegrieving
Episode transcripts and support the show: thesilentwhy.buzzsprout.com
Thank you for listening.

#033. How do murder detectives cope with facing loss every day in the form of murder? In this episode we chat to Steve Keogh, a former Scotland Yard murder detective.
This is The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to open up conversations around loss and grief and to see if hope can be found in 101 different types of loss.

Steve retired from London's Metropolitan Police in 2021 and since then he's earned a following for his written work and YouTube live videos about his time solving murders.
This episode looks at what it’s like working with loss through murder on a daily basis, as well as the loss of a personal life to a vocation like working as a police officer and detective.

Loss #24 of 101 - Loss of life through murder

We had lots of questions for Steve around such a fascinating area of work and wanted to know if it’s anything like the exciting chase for a murderer that you see on the TV. He told us about what it’s like being the first on the scene for the 7/7 London Bombings, dealing with the families of victims, moments in court after long chases for a conviction.

For more about Steve visit his website: https://murderacademy.com/

Or his social media channels:
https://www.youtube.com/c/MurderAcademy
https://www.facebook.com/MrStevenKeogh
https://www.instagram.com/murderacademy/

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Support the show through: buymeacoffee.com/thesilentwhy
Review the show: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Goodpods
More about the hosts, our childless journey, photos of guests, blog, and official 101 losses list: thesilentwhy.com
What's a Herman? - thesilentwhy.com/herman
Tips on how to help and talk to griefy people: thesilentwhy.com/post/howtotalktothegrieving
Episode transcripts and support the show: thesilentwhy.buzzsprout.com
Thank you for listening.

#017. Welcome to some new types of episodes for 2022 - 'Let’s Chat...'

These episodes will pop up each month as I (Claire Sandys, one of the co-hosts of The Silent Why podcast) chat to a guest who has experience or expertise in a particular area that can help us either deal with, or prepare for, loss. We'll be putting these out every now and then instead of our usual 101 loss episodes.
And I'm building a tool kit, well actually, a whole tool shed, of equipment to help you face and get through loss. And I'm very keen to see what each guest adds to my new shed.
I'm kicking off this new series chatting to Sue Brayne about mortality.
Sue Brayne hosts a podcast called Embracing your Mortality where she speaks with guests about why engaging with our mortality matters. She’s a speaker, an author and has been involved with end-of-life research, and years as a therapist working in bereavement and grief, and now she hosts Death Cafes too.
I spoke to her about why facing our mortality and knowing we’re going to die one day is a useful tool when preparing for, or going through, loss. And asked her what actually happens at a Death Cafe?!
For more about Sue visit: https://suebrayne.co.uk/

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Support the show through: buymeacoffee.com/thesilentwhy
Review the show: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Goodpods
More about the hosts, our childless journey, photos of guests, blog, and official 101 losses list: thesilentwhy.com
What's a Herman? - thesilentwhy.com/herman
Tips on how to help and talk to griefy people: thesilentwhy.com/post/howtotalktothegrieving
Episode transcripts and support the show: thesilentwhy.buzzsprout.com
Thank you for listening.

#022. What do we lose when we suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)? How can we be more sympathetic to it? Is it only war veterans that suffer from it? And what are the symptoms?
Welcome to Let’s Chat... Episodes that pop up each month as I (Claire Sandys, one of the co-hosts of The Silent Why podcast) chat to a guest who has experience or expertise in a particular area that can help us either deal with, or prepare for, loss.

And I'm building a tool kit, well - actually - a whole tool shed, of equipment to help you face and get through loss. And I'm very keen to see what each guest adds to my new shed.

For my second Let’s Chat... I spoke to Dr Colleen Crary about Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, known as PTSD.

Colleen was diagnosed with a complicated type of PTSD called C-PTSD at the age of 40, and became so fascinated by the condition it became her passion. She now has a Master's Degree in Victimology and achieved a Doctorate in Psychology specialising in PTSD. Her journey is a fascinating insight into this mental condition and having been through over 40 therapists to find the right help, studied Criminology, and partied with homicide detectives, she has a very unique insight on a condition where people experience a permanent alteration, and loss, of self.

However, she also told me there are ways for people to emerge from trauma with more resilience than they had before, and some people have even described it as a positive, life-changing event that brought a greater sense of depth and beauty to their lives.

Colleen shares valuable insights about what PTSD is, how it’s not just something military veterans suffer with, how you can recognise it, why it occurs and what you can do about it.

For more about Colleen: https://www.linkedin.com/in/colleen-m-crary-ph-d-7582a9118/
For more information and symptoms of PTSD:
https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/ptsd/what-is-ptsd
https://www.apa.org/ptsd-guideline

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Support the show through: buymeacoffee.com/thesilentwhy
Review the show: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Goodpods
More about the hosts, our childless journey, photos of guests, blog, and official 101 losses list: thesilentwhy.com
What's a Herman? - thesilentwhy.com/herman
Tips on how to help and talk to griefy people: thesilentwhy.com/post/howtotalktothegrieving
Episode transcripts and support the show: thesilentwhy.buzzsprout.com
Thank you for listening.

#003. Part 2. This second part of Episode 003 is us again (the hosts, Chris & Claire Sandys) as we continue to share our story of being a childless couple.
This is The Silent Why, a podcast on a mission to open up conversations around loss and grief and to see if hope can be found in 101 different types of loss.
Loss #3 of 101 continued: Loss of fertility

In Part 1, we spoke about our personal story with infertility over the last 11 years and turning down medical intervention, before drawing a line in the sand. You'll want to check that out before this episode probably: https://www.thesilentwhy.com/podcast/episode/492a29c1/loss-of-fertility-chris-and-claire-sandys-part-1
In Part 2, we answer questions anonymously submitted by friends. Questions they’d like to ask a couple without children, or things they’re curious about.
Such as:
How do you feel when people close to you continue to have babies?
How do you find ways to fill the gaps left by childlessness?
How do you deal with the insensitive questions, graciously?
In what practical ways can friends and family best support you?
For more about our journey, including photos of our Line in the Sand moment, visit the blog post on our website: thesilentwhy.com/post/alineinthesandys

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Instagram | Facebook | Twitter | LinkedIn
Support the show through: buymeacoffee.com/thesilentwhy
Review the show: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Goodpods
More about the hosts, our childless journey, photos of guests, blog, and official 101 losses list: thesilentwhy.com
What's a Herman? - thesilentwhy.com/herman
Tips on how to help and talk to griefy people: thesilentwhy.com/post/howtotalktothegrieving
Episode transcripts and support the show: thesilentwhy.buzzsprout.com
Thank you for listening.