What Fresh Hell: Laughing in the Face of Motherhood | Parenting Tips From Funny Moms

Vaccines. Mandate-liftings. Scaled reopenings. All of these things are great and long wished for.

But we were kind of thinking there'd be a bell, or something. A hard deadline. A day when we'd all dance out into the ticker-taped streets and make out with strangers in Times Square.

Without a "you are now free to move about the cabin" announcement, how will we know when it's okay for grandparents to visit? To fly to that wedding? To toss our masks once and for all?

When is it okay to start saying yes?

Our listener Heather put it this way:

I think seeing a light at the end of the tunnel can be unsettling. We've been living in this weird way for a year now. And as much as it seems crazy, we've gotten used to it.

Psychologists call the stress this is making us feel the “third-quarter phenomenon.” For people forced to endure long stretches of isolation– astronauts, Arctic explorers, submarine sailors– the most difficult part, regardless of the length of the assignment, has been proven to be about 75% of the way through, precisely when the end of the assignment first comes into distant focus.

As things start to open up and some of us don't feel ready, or wonder if the world is ready, it's a new source of stress that we were saved from when we were all apart.

Past scientists and astronauts who suffered from the “third-quarter phenomenon" were advised to refocus on their mission- why they were doing what they were doing, and the great worth of seeing it through. Seems like great advice for the rest of us. Focusing on the mission might be what will get us through this last part of the tunnel.

Here are links to writing on the topic that we discuss in this episode:

Tara Law for Time: We're in the Third Quarter of the Pandemic. Antarctic Researchers, Mars Simulation Scientists and Navy Submarine Officers Have Advice For How to Get Through It

Robert Bechtel and Amy Berning: The Third-Quarter Phenomenon: Do People Experience Discomfort After Stress Has Passed?

Nathan Smith: The third-quarter phenomenon: the psychology of time in space

"Beautiful City" from Godspell (1973)

"Brand New Day" from The Wiz (1978)

@neilochka on Instagram

Leave us a rating or review in your favorite podcast app!

Join us on Facebook: https://facebook.com/whatfreshhellcast

Instagram: https://instagram.com/whatfreshhellcast

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/WhatFreshHellPodcast

Pinterest: https://pinterest.com/whatfreshhellcast

Twitter: https://twitter.com/WFHpodcast

questions and feedback: [email protected]

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Sara Dean is the host of The Shameless Mom Academy podcast, which inspires women and moms to live bigger, bolder, and braver #everydamnday.

In this episode, we discuss

• how to turn our struggles into strengths
• why self-care is a basic human need
• how to "play bigger" and be a leader in your life, even when you are home with kids

Connect with Sara at www.shamelessmom.com

in her Facebook Group: www.shamelessmom.com/facebook

and on Instagram: www.instagram.com/shamelessmomacademy

Special thanks to this month's sponsors:

Betabrand has reinvented comfort and style with their dress yoga pants, and we love ours! Get 30% off your first order when you go to Betabrand.com/LAUGHING.

Daily Harvest delivers delicious harvest bowls, flatbreads, smoothies, and more, all built on organic fruits and vegetables. Go to dailyharvest.com/laughing to get up to $40 off your first box!

Home.Made. Podcast is a terrific new podcast offering stories about the meaning of home in America. Subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts!

flowkey lets you learn piano at your own pace. Go to flowkey.com/whatfreshhell to receive 7 days of flowkey Premium for free and 20% off an annual subscription.

Indeed is the only job site where you're guaranteed to find quality applicants -- or else you don't pay! Upgrade your job post with a $75 sponsored job credit through March 31st at indeed.com/laughing.

KiwiCo projects make science, technology, engineering, art, and math super fun. Get 30% off your first month plus FREE shipping on ANY crate line with code MOTHERHOOD.

Membrasin is the totally natural, estrogen-free, clinically-proven feminine moisture formula. Go to membrasinlife.com and use the code FRESH10 to get 10% off.

Native products keep you feeling and smelling fresh. Get 20% off your first order by going to nativedeo.com/fresh or by using the promo code FRESH.

Parade underwear and loungewear are sustainable, size-inclusive, comfortable and fantastic! Go to Parade.com/Laughing and use the code LAUGHING for 20% off your first order.

Peloton has a workout for every goal, day, and mood: everything from boxing and dance cardio to yoga and meditation. Visit onepeloton.com to learn more.

Prose now makes supplements personally tailored to address your specific cause of hair shedding. Get your free in-depth consultation and 15% off your custom hair supplements at prose.com/laughing.

School Toolbox makes shopping for school supplies for your kids easier– and also creates fundraising opportunities for your school! Find out more at schooltoolbox.com/whatfreshhell.

Thrive Causemetics high-performing beauty and skin-care products are made with clean, skin-loving ingredients. Get 15% off your first order at thrivecausemetics.com/whatfreshhell.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It often becomes clear to us where our boundaries should have been set only after those lines have been crossed and left far behind. But whether it's with overbearing extended family members or partners who leave socks on the floor, how do we create effective boundaries? Especially after it's been established that we're not very good at it, and especially in a world that doesn't very much like women who aren't afraid to set them?

In this episode we discuss why boundaries should be set early and often– and not just in problematic relationships, either. Healthy boundaries with our spouses, partners, and co-workers are what make long-term relationships possible. And don't forget positive boundaries. Want to start setting aside more money each month? Having one date night a week, or one weekend morning when you get to sleep in? It starts with saying so.

Living in a pandemic has made it unavoidable: we all have to say out loud what feels safe for us and our families. We can seize that opportunity to practice the difficult conversations. Those on the other sides of those conversations are entitled to their reactions and opinions. But that doesn't necessarily mean that setting the boundary was wrong.

Here are links to some writing on the topic that we discuss in this episode:

Fatherly: 16 Tips For Creating Healthy Boundaries With Your Extended Family

Mark Manson: Boundaries

Elizabeth Earnshaw for Mind Body Green: A Therapist Explains 6 Things People Get Wrong About Setting Boundaries

Sarah Saweikis for Medium: Scared to Set Boundaries? How to Set Boundaries to Improve Your Relationships and Increase Peace of Mind

Brianna Wiest: The Honest Truth About Why Some People Can't Set Boundaries

Leave us a rating or review in your favorite podcast app!

Join us on Facebook: https://facebook.com/whatfreshhellcast

Instagram: https://instagram.com/whatfreshhellcast

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/WhatFreshHellPodcast

Pinterest: https://pinterest.com/whatfreshhellcast

Twitter: https://twitter.com/WFHpodcast

questions and feedback: [email protected]

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How do we prepare for a future that isn’t clear? How do we prepare our kids for their future when what that might look like is also unclear?

Uncertainty is an unavoidable part of the parenting journey, but in this episode we’re talking about those really uncertain times: the “this might be nothing, but we’d like to run more tests” times. The “we actually aren’t sure what’s happening here” times. The "this could really go either way" moments in our lives.

In this episode we discuss

• why parenting through uncertainty is so hard
• how these times have played out in our own lives
• why “just try not to think about it!” is terrible advice
• why the things we do to reduce our uncertainty can sometimes backfire

Here are links to some writing on the topic that we discuss in this episode:

Mark Freeston et al: Towards a model of uncertainty distress in the context of Coronavirus (Covid-19)

Nabi Nazari and Mark Griffiths: Using Fear and Anxiety Related to COVID-19 to Predict Cyberchondria: Cross-sectional Survey Study

Victoria Maxwell for Psychology Today: 6 Ways to Increase Uncertainty Tolerance

and this past episode of ours:

https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/the-back-to-school-hell-pandemic-edition/

Special thanks to our sponsors for this month:

Athletic Greens supports your sleep quality, energy, immune system and more with just one scoop per day. Get a free one-year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs with your first purchase at athleticgreens.com/laughing.

Beam makes products for sleep, calm, focus, and recovery. Get $20 off any purchase over $75 at beamorganics.com/FRESH, or just type in the code "FRESH" at checkout.

Betabrand has reinvented comfort and style with their Dress Yoga Pants, and we love ours! Get 30% off your first order when you go to Betabrand.com/LAUGHING.

Betterhelp Start taking charge of your mental health– no matter where you live! Go to betterhelp.com/fresh to get 10% off your first month of counseling.

Flowkey lets you learn piano at your own pace. Go to flowkey.com/whatfreshhell to receive 7 days of Flowkey Premium for free and 20% off the first year of an annual subscription.

Indeed is the only job site where you're guaranteed to find applicants that meet your requirements-- or you don't pay! Upgrade your job post with a $75 sponsored job credit through 3/31/22 at indeed.com/laughing.

KiwiCo projects make science, technology, engineering, art, and math super fun. Get 50% off your first month at kiwico.com with the code MOTHERHOOD.

Membrasin is the totally natural, estrogen-free, clinically-proven feminine moisture formula. Go to membrasinlife.com to find out more and use the code FRESH10 to get 10% off.

Once Upon a Farm fruit and vegetable blends are made with whole, organic, farm-fresh ingredients . Go to onceuponafarmorganics.com and use the code FRESH25 for 25% off your ...

Sometimes all the "treasure every moment, Mama" content can make us feel like it's all downhill from here, that each year of parenting becomes a little less special.

This suspicion is confirmed when we're with our little ones at the grocery store and an older woman takes us in, nods knowingly, then says with a raised eyebrow, "Just you wait."

But wait for what? Does only peril and sass-mouth lie ahead?

In this episode we discuss how parenting changes, and why that change is not to be feared or resisted. Some things honestly change for the better. Some things for sure you miss. But all change is absolutely, totally okay.

For more on this topic, and in particular the answers to "yes but when does it change for the EASIER?", check out our episode Your Life Begins Again When... (The Second Half of Parenting)

Special thanks to this month's sponsors:

Athletic Greens supports your sleep quality, energy, immune system, and more with just one scoop per day. Get a 1-year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs at athleticgreens.com/laughing.

Bedtime Stories with Netflix Jr. is a new podcast that will lull your kids to sleep with 15-minute stories featuring their favorite Netflix Jr. characters! Subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts.

Betabrand has reinvented comfort and style with their Dress Yoga Pants, and we love ours! Get 30% off your first order when you go to Betabrand.com/LAUGHING.

Betterhelp Start taking charge of your mental health– no matter where you live! Go to betterhelp.com/fresh to get 10% off your first month of counseling.

Daily Harvest delivers delicious harvest bowls, flatbreads, smoothies, and more built on organic fruits and vegetables. Go to dailyharvest.com/laughing to get up to $40 off your first box!

flowkey lets you learn piano at your own pace. Go to flowkey.com/whatfreshhell to receive 7 days of Flowkey Premium for free and 20% off the first year of an annual subscription.

Indeed guarantees you'll find quality applicants that meet your must-have requirements-- or else you don't pay! Upgrade your job post with a $75 sponsored job credit through March 31st at indeed.com/laughing.

KiwiCo projects make science, technology, engineering, art, and math super fun. Get 50% off your first month at kiwico.com with the code MOTHERHOOD.

Membrasin is the totally natural, estrogen-free, clinically-proven feminine moisture formula. Go to membrasinlife.com to find out more and use the code FRESH10 to get 10% off.

Parade underwear and loungewear are sustainable, size-inclusive, comfortable and fantastic! Go to Parade.com/laughing and use the code LAUGHING for 20% off your first order.

Peloton has a workout for every goal, day, and mood: everything from boxing and dance cardio to yoga and meditation. Visit onepeloton.com to learn more.

Prose now makes supplements personally tailored to address your specific cause of hair shedding. Get your free in-depth consultation and 15% off your custom hair supplements at prose.com/laughing.