DEEP DIVE: It's Not "Nagging"
04/15/24 • 41 min
2 Listeners
This month, we're doing a deep dive series into the division of household labor—why it's often unbalanced, and what we can do about it. You can find the playlist with all of the episodes in the series here.
Want to see a mother get mad? Tell her she's "nagging" you after she's been obligated to repeat an entirely reasonable request several times over. And just why is "nagging" a word that's almost exclusively applied to women?
We need the other members of our households to show up and do their share. As the default parents, we own the lists. So do we stop caring whether others like how we ask and remind? Do we enforce a back-to-one where we're not forced to ask repeatedly in the first place?
In this episode Amy and Margaret discuss:
- The sexism and etymology of the word "nag"
- What Amy says are the three types of "nagging," and why we should separate them out
- What to say when our repeated asking is framed as annoying to other people (guess to whom it's also annoying, too?)
Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode:
- Jessica Zhang on LinkedIn: "What's In a Nag?"
- Episode from If Books Could Kill podcast: "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus"
- McClelland, T., & Sliwa, P: "Gendered affordance perception and unequal domestic labour."
- Our episode with Lynyetta Willis on "Stable Misery"
- Our episode with Eve Rodsky on "Changing the Invisible Workload"
- Anne Helen Petersen's newsletter Culture Study
We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:
https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/
mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent,
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
This month, we're doing a deep dive series into the division of household labor—why it's often unbalanced, and what we can do about it. You can find the playlist with all of the episodes in the series here.
Want to see a mother get mad? Tell her she's "nagging" you after she's been obligated to repeat an entirely reasonable request several times over. And just why is "nagging" a word that's almost exclusively applied to women?
We need the other members of our households to show up and do their share. As the default parents, we own the lists. So do we stop caring whether others like how we ask and remind? Do we enforce a back-to-one where we're not forced to ask repeatedly in the first place?
In this episode Amy and Margaret discuss:
- The sexism and etymology of the word "nag"
- What Amy says are the three types of "nagging," and why we should separate them out
- What to say when our repeated asking is framed as annoying to other people (guess to whom it's also annoying, too?)
Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode:
- Jessica Zhang on LinkedIn: "What's In a Nag?"
- Episode from If Books Could Kill podcast: "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus"
- McClelland, T., & Sliwa, P: "Gendered affordance perception and unequal domestic labour."
- Our episode with Lynyetta Willis on "Stable Misery"
- Our episode with Eve Rodsky on "Changing the Invisible Workload"
- Anne Helen Petersen's newsletter Culture Study
We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:
https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/
mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent,
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Previous Episode
Fresh Take: Diane Boden, "Minimalist Moms"
Is it even possible to declutter your home for more than one minute at a time when you've got kids? Diane Boden, host of the Minimalist Moms podcast, offers parenting tips for cutting down on possessions in a manageable way.
Diane Boden is the host of the Minimalist Moms Podcast and author of Minimalist Moms: Living and Parenting with Simplicity. She lives in Ohio with her husband and three kids.
Diane, Margaret, and Amy discuss:
- What minimalism can mean for different people
- Simple steps for starting the decluttering process—and some more radical strategies too
- How to reconcile different set points for clutter between parenting partners
- How to deal with family members who love giving gifts
Here's where you can find Diane:
- minimalistmomspodcast.com
- @minimalistmomspodcast on all socials
- Buy MINIMALIST MOMS: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781642505092
- Listen to the Minimalist Moms podcast
We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:
https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/
mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, minimalism, decluttering
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Next Episode
Do We Share Too Much About Our Kids Online?
We all know what extreme "oversharenting" is when we see it. It's the gray areas that get harder. When we post about our kid's adventures in potty training, are we supposed to think twice?
What will happen when our kids are old enough to want to curate their own internet presence?
How concerned should we be about the privacy we may have given away without thinking?
Amy and Margaret discuss:
- the digital footprint and the "right to be forgotten"
- what to check in your privacy settings
- when to start asking kids for permission before you post
- the benefits we gain from sharing about our families online
Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode:
- Zoya Garg, Elmer Gomez and Luciana Yael Petrzela for the NY Times: "If You Didn't 'Sharent,' Did You Even Parent?"
- Sean Coughlan for the BBC: "'Sharenting' puts young at risk of online fraud"
- Fortesa Latifi for Cosmopolitan: "What’s the Price of a Childhood Turned Into Content?"
- Fortesa Latifi for Cosmopolitan: "'We’re Never Doing This Again': What It Took for These Parenting Influencers to Pull Their Kids Offline"
- Paula Cocozza for The Guardian: "‘I was so embarrassed I cried’: do parents share too much online?"
- Amy Webb for Slate: "We Post Nothing About Our Daughter Online"
- Jennifer Valentino-DeVries and Michael H. Keller for the NY Times: "A Marketplace of Girl Influencers Managed by Moms and Stalked by Men"
- Megan Francis: When Your “Worst-Mom Moment” Becomes A Viral Meme (And How The “Surfboard Kid” Became A Man)
We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:
https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/
mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent,
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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