Struggle Care
KC Davis
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Top 10 Struggle Care Episodes
Goodpods has curated a list of the 10 best Struggle Care episodes, ranked by the number of listens and likes each episode have garnered from our listeners. If you are listening to Struggle Care for the first time, there's no better place to start than with one of these standout episodes. If you are a fan of the show, vote for your favorite Struggle Care episode by adding your comments to the episode page.
01: Executive Functioning with Lesley PsyD
Struggle Care
10/03/22 • 52 min
Today, we are diving into executive functioning, which is a popular term being bounced around in mental health communities. I want to take a closer look at what it means and how it shows up in people’s lives. Join me to learn more from today’s guest!
Dr. Lesley Cook is a psychologist who does a lot of work with ADHD and other neurodivergencies. Born and raised in Hawaii, she now lives in Virginia and works with children, adolescents, adults, couples, and families. Dr. Lesley and I met on TikTok, and I’m happy to have her here today!
Show Highlights:
- A common-language definition and explanation of executive functioning
- How executive function deficits show up in someone’s life
- How shame, guilt, and inconsistent performance are clues to executive function problems
- The difference between motivation and task initiation
- Why the underlying issue with lack of motivation is more about what a person values
- How a person’s sense of self is affected when they believe their authentic self is “bad”
- Why external supports are necessary when an internal system is down
- Why rhythm is better than routine for those with executive function disorder
- How neurotypical people experience interruptions with executive functioning on a regular basis because of overload and anxiety
- How blips in executive function occur in neurotypical people with predictability and response to intervention—as opposed to someone with a diagnosis
- How someone with ADHD can have incredible deficits in executive function on days when everything is going their way–and won’t respond reliably to normal interventions
- How to build into each day differing levels of acceptable outcomes–and give yourself permission to choose what fits your needs at that moment
- Lesley’s advice to those who think they have executive functioning issues
Resources:
Connect with Dr. Lesley: TikTok and Instagram
Connect with KC: TikTok and Instagram
Get KC's Book, How to Keep House While Drowning
Find great resources about executive functioning:
www.understood.org, www.psychologytoday.com, and www.chaad.org
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
4 Listeners
14: Weaponized Incompetence with Dr. Lesley Cook
Struggle Care
12/19/22 • 64 min
Today’s topic is weaponized incompetence. If you aren’t familiar with the term, stay tuned and learn more with us. I’m thrilled to be joined again by Dr. Lesley Cook, who is a psychologist and good friend. She lives in Virginia and works mostly with neurodivergent kids, adolescents, and adults. Join us for the conversation!
Show Highlights:
- An explanation of “weaponized incompetence” and what it means
- How weaponized incompetence applies to the division of household labor
- The key to analyzing weaponized incompetence: Why is it happening?
- Why this is a tricky topic, especially for those who are neurodivergent and feel challenged
- Why dignity should be preserved in these conversations with a partner
- Why it’s OK to set boundaries even if someone is unintentionally hurting you
- Ways to solve problems without shame or blame
- The difference in functional barriers and weaponized incompetence
- How to talk through solutions and support for a partner
- How “maternal gatekeeping” plays into the dynamic
- Why couples need to have conversations about care tasks, household chores, and childcare BEFORE they have kids
- Why there is a difference between weaponized incompetence and learned helplessness
- Dr. Lesley’s tips: “Approach your partner in good faith, open up the conversation, and ask for collaboration in finding something that works better for BOTH partners.”
- Why the question should be, “Is exploitation happening?”
- Why you can’t go on appearances regarding a division of labor
- How to begin the approach with a partner or child: “This isn’t working for me; how can we figure this out together?”
Resources:
Connect with Dr. Lesley: TikTok and Instagram
Connect with KC: TikTok and Instagram
Get KC’s book, How to Keep House While Drowning
Helpful resources mentioned in this episode:
How Not to Hate Your Husband After Kids by Jancee Dunn
Fair Play by Eve Rodsky
The Sensory Child Gets Organized by Carolyn Dalgliesh
Ready for Take-Off by Theresa E. Laurie Maitland and Patricia O. Quinn
A Radical Guide for Women with ADHD by Sari Solden, Michelle Frank, and Ellen Littman
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
2 Listeners
10/10/22 • 12 min
Today, we start with my take on a question that I get asked almost every day about how to keep from losing motivation to complete tasks, especially those simple ones like cleaning a room. If you’ve beaten yourself up over this struggle, then join me for a fresh perspective on cleaning your space!
Show Highlights:
- Why losing motivation to clean a room comes down to not realizing that tidying, organizing, and cleaning are three different projects
- What is required to “tidy a room”: a five-step method
- How organizing differs from tidying and cleaning
- What the cleaning process entails
- Why there’s nothing wrong with being a neat or messy person, but a functional level of organization is essential
- How the tasks of tidying, organizing, and cleaning bring emotional barriers, especially for those with executive function disorders
- Why we need to remember that these care tasks are morally neutral–and the only reason to do them is so we can function better
Resources:
Connect with KC: TikTok and Instagram
Get KC's Book, How to Keep House While Drowning
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
2 Listeners
05: Gentle Organizing with Alison Lush
Struggle Care
10/17/22 • 59 min
Do you have too much stuff? As you look around your home, is it crowded and cluttered? Does your space make you feel burdened, unhappy, and frustrated? If you said–or shouted–YES, you can’t miss today’s show. Join me to learn more about gentle organizing.
Alison Lush is a Certified Professional Organizer, Certified Virtual Organizer, and Master Trainer. After a 20-year catering career, Alison knew she needed better organization and management skills for her home and personal comfort. She learned to live and shop intentionally, creating and protecting the space in her home. Now she puts her expertise to work in helping others by empowering them and teaching them to put themselves at the center of their organization efforts.
Show Highlights:
- How Alison became an organizer with a gentle spirit
- Why our interactions with our home, space, time, and belongings form the foundations of our lives
- Why Alison’s focus is on “organic organizing”
- Alison’s answer to a question sent in by Samantha about dealing with clutter, letting things go, and the functionality of her space
- How to organize your space by using Zone 1, Zone 2, and Zone 3—and consider the frequency of access for each item
- Ways to keep, honor, and display memorabilia by identifying the risk level in letting items go
- How to consider the purpose of items in our lives in deciding to keep them or let them go
- Alison’s answer to a question from Kitty about decorating, a sense of style, and learning to feel good about her space
- How to reframe what might look crappy and rundown to you as a life well-lived, meaningful, and full of love
- Why your decor should fuel you and recharge your batteries
- Alison’s answer to a question from Aria about separating and managing work life and home life
- How to legitimize, categorize, and systemize your space for the best functionality
- Why the professional organizing industry has the reputation of telling people to “just get rid of your stuff”
Resources:
Connect with Alison: www.alisonlush.ca and TikTok
Connect with KC: TikTok and Instagram
Get KC's Book, How to Keep House While Drowning
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
2 Listeners
02: Q&A: ADHD, Kids, & Care Tasks
Struggle Care
10/03/22 • 34 min
Welcome to another episode of Struggle Care! In our first episode, you heard my conversation with Dr. Lesley Cook about executive functioning. Because she has so much great information and wisdom to share, I decided to bring her back to discuss how to navigate care tasks specifically for ADHD adults and kids. Join us for the conversation with Dr. Lesley!
Dr. Lesley Cook is a psychologist who does a lot of work with ADHD and other neurodivergencies. Born and raised in Hawaii, she now lives in Virginia and works with children, adolescents, adults, couples, and families.
Show Highlights:
- How to find the balance between the message of self-compassion and the need for better life management and progress
- A basic understanding of self-compassion from Dr. Kristin Neff’s writings
- A closer look at shame and how we experience it in relation to self-compassion
- How to gently shift shame into self-compassion
- How self-compassion can become a learned behavior that we pass down to our children
Resources:
Connect with Dr. Lesley: TikTok and Instagram
Connect with KC: TikTok and Instagram
Get KC's Book, How to Keep House While Drowning
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
2 Listeners
22: Moral Perfectionsim
Struggle Care
02/27/23 • 16 min
I’ve never been a perfectionist. I’ve never cared if my bed is made or my handwriting is neat or if a picture on the wall is hanging perfectly. I’m not bothered by things being a little “out of place.” So imagine my surprise to discover that my whole life is run by perfectionism–a different kind of perfectionism. That’s today’s topic on the show. Join me to find out more!
Show Highlights:
- How an 18-month-stint as a teenager in a long-term rehab facility turned me into a moral perfectionist
- How a militaristic 12-step program and an evangelical church forced me to examine every daily decision for pure, altruistic motives
- How this type of perfectionism told me that I had to be “good enough” to be loved and accepted
- How even self-improvement is approached differently with moral perfectionism
- Why it’s impossible to live with moral perfectionism
- The first step toward change: recognizing that I am a moral perfectionist who is trying to earn my worth through altruism and unselfishness
- Why you are not alone if you feel like a moral perfectionist
- An excerpt from my book, How to Keep House While Drowning, chapter 3
Resources:
Connect with KC: TikTok, Instagram, and Website
Get KC’s book, How to Keep House While Drowning
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
2 Listeners
01/09/23 • 46 min
Dental hygiene is a Struggle Care issue that elicits very strong feelings, as evidenced by the number of responses I receive to any social media post on this topic. Why do so many people feel strongly about brushing their teeth? Let’s talk about it with today’s guest!
Taylor McFarland is a pediatric dentist, wife, and mother who creates content on social media about dental care. She and I follow each other on TikTok, and I knew she was the perfect person to help us dive into the problem of why brushing teeth is a big Struggle Care topic for many people.
Show Highlights:
- How Dr. Taylor, as a pediatric dentist, came to the unique viewpoint of understanding why mental health issues cause people to struggle with teeth brushing
- Why everyone who experiences this struggle thinks they are THE ONLY ONE
- Helpful tips on how to find a dentist who will most likely be more understanding
- Why it helps to be honest about your specific barriers to brushing
- The purpose behind brushing—and why it’s OK to skip the toothpaste!
- How to “pick the pain” that will increase your functioning
- The purpose of toothpaste–(Fluoride is the key!)
- Why sodium lauryl sulfate is usually the ingredient that bothers most people who have toothpaste sensitivity
- Dr. Taylor’s tips for people bothered by toothpaste, and toothbrush bristles
- How apps can make brushing more tolerable, especially with electric toothbrushes
- Why it sometimes helps to brush your teeth in a different place, like in the shower or the kitchen
- Why charcoal toothpaste is NOT the best option for daily use
Resources:
Connect with Dr. Taylor: TikTok, Instagram, and Website
Connect with KC: TikTok, Instagram, and Website (Click the “Hygiene” tab under “Resources” for more information about teeth brushing!)
Get KC’s book, How to Keep House While Drowning
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
1 Listener
10/16/23 • 33 min
Social anxiety is a common experience for many people. Today’s show is about the tips and tricks we can use to deal with this kind of anxiety when we have to be social and in public. Join us to learn more!
I’m joined by Michelle Huillet, an interpersonal communication instructor at Oregon State University in Corvallis, Oregon. In her interpersonal communication course for college freshmen and sophomores, Michelle teaches all about communication in relationships, including listening, nonverbal communication, emotions, and social anxiety.
Show Highlights:
● How social anxiety boils down to a fear of judgment
● How Michelle’s students describe their social anxiety
● Why many people who struggle with social anxiety look comfortable and confident on the outside
● Accommodations for social anxiety
● How nonverbal cues, like eye contact, can allow people with social anxiety to remain engaged and participate
● Challenges to do with baby steps to become more comfortable with social anxiety by “getting your feet wet”
● How our imperfections bring connection points–and give a gift to those around us
● Michelle’s words of wisdom for those who have social anxiety
Resources and Links:
Mentioned in this episode: The Anxiety Healer's Guide: Coping Strategies and Mindfulness Techniques to Calm the Mind and Body by Alison Seponara
Connect with KC: Website, TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook
Get KC’s book, How to Keep House While Drowning
We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: www.strugglecare.com/promo-codes
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
1 Listener
10/24/22 • 29 min
In our first episode, you heard my conversation with Dr. Lesley Cook about executive functioning. Because she has so much great information and wisdom to share, I decided to bring her back to discuss self-compassion. Is it a bad thing to have TOO MUCH self-compassion? Join us for the conversation with Dr. Lesley!
Dr. Lesley Cook is a psychologist who does a lot of work with ADHD and other neurodivergencies. Born and raised in Hawaii, she now lives in Virginia and works with children, adolescents, adults, couples, and families.
Show Highlights:
- How to find the balance between the message of self-compassion and the need for better life management and progress
- A basic understanding of self-compassion from Dr. Kristin Neff’s writings
- A closer look at shame and how we experience it in relation to self-compassion
- How to gently shift shame into self-compassion
- How self-compassion can become a learned behavior that we pass down to our children
Resources:
Connect with Dr. Lesley: TikTok and Instagram
Connect with KC: TikTok and Instagram
Get KC's Book, How to Keep House While Drowning
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
1 Listener
09: Q&A: A Traumatically Clean House
Struggle Care
11/14/22 • 17 min
I have the perfect person to answer a question about “trauma cleaning” as a result of being raised by a parent who was emotionally and verbally abusive about keeping a clean house. This question came from Maria, a TikTok follower, and I’m jumping into this topic in today’s episode with my guest, Amanda Dodson. Join us!
Show Highlights:
- Why this is a common feeling for many people when they sense barriers around care tasks
- A good first step: Try to separate the behavioral home care task from the interpersonal problem with the parent
- Why you have to decide how YOU want your home to be for your own comfort and safety–not how your parent would want it to be
- Why it’s important to have compassion for yourself and awareness of what you need in your space to function well
- How to identify what you need from your space and use a triage approach to get there
- How to have your environment and emotions “meet” at a halfway point
- How to take small steps toward organizing that work for you and your family
Connect with KC: TikTok and Instagram
Get KC's Book, How to Keep House While Drowning
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
1 Listener
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FAQ
How many episodes does Struggle Care have?
Struggle Care currently has 130 episodes available.
What topics does Struggle Care cover?
The podcast is about Podcasts, Self-Improvement and Education.
What is the most popular episode on Struggle Care?
The episode title '01: Executive Functioning with Lesley PsyD' is the most popular.
What is the average episode length on Struggle Care?
The average episode length on Struggle Care is 45 minutes.
How often are episodes of Struggle Care released?
Episodes of Struggle Care are typically released every 7 days.
When was the first episode of Struggle Care?
The first episode of Struggle Care was released on Sep 7, 2022.
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