One Day You Finally Knew: For Folx Breaking Away

Deciding to leave something (or someone) is a creative process. It doesn't happen overnight. We must sit and steep in the possibilities, spend the necessary time contemplating the actions, and only then can we make our move. The breaking away is the outcome, but it can't happen without the process. This is a gestational process. Nothing gets born without being gestated first, whether it's an actual living being, or an idea wanting to get birthed into the world.

This process, however, will be interrupted if we leave out a deeply important piece, which is to understand that before we actually make the decision to move, we have to sit and dream into what it is that we're wanting. We then must feel the uncomfortable feelings that come along with that. We need to allow ourselves to really go deeply into that place; the place where what wants to die gets eaten, gets metabolized, gets transformed. Only then do we arrive at a place where we can make a decision and go forward.
We must include before we can transcend, sweet ones.

In today's episode, we invite ourselves to sit and simmer in all the feelings that are coming up for us, whatever it is we're working with, getting curious about this as a PROCESS. This inner work has its own timeline, and we must be patient while it is creating the space, the bandwidth for you to be able to dive into what your deepest presence wants next.

Jessica also does her best Veruca Salt impression, which sadly sounds a bit more like Mrs. Doubtfire, and she pays homage to Dr. "Bones" McCoy.
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The One Day You Finally Knew: For Women Breaking Away podcast is mixed and produced by Jessica Chasnoff, a recovering perfectionist who is always in a learning curve. While she is a psychologist, this podcast is not psychotherapy, and is not a substitute for mental health services. If you're struggling with mental health concerns, please reach out to a professional near you.
Connect with Jessica:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/your_deepest_presence/
Twitter: http://Twitter.com/@deepestpresence
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100070192401240
Website: https://www.DeepestPresence.com

The glorious monsoon Tucson is having this summer has Jessica thinking about hydration. After a good long soak, you can almost hear the desert flora and fauna sighing with relief. What would happen if we got to have our own sigh? If we slowed down and really appreciated how fortunate we are to have clean water to drink? Can't be anything but good! A sweet, little combination meditation and gratitude practice awaits you here.
P.S. Jessica takes the risk of burping into the microphone because she insists on drinking fizzy water, despite it being a podcaster no-no. Can she make it through this little bonus episode without a colossal belch?
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The One Day You Finally Knew: For Women Breaking Away podcast is mixed and produced by Jessica Chasnoff, a recovering perfectionist who is always in a learning curve. While she is a psychologist, this podcast is not psychotherapy, and is not a substitute for mental health services. If you're struggling with mental health concerns, please reach out to a professional near you.
Connect with Jessica:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/your_deepest_presence/
Twitter: http://Twitter.com/@deepestpresence
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100070192401240
Website: https://www.DeepestPresence.com

As women, we've been indoctrinated into believing the misogynist demand that once we've consented to something, we don't have the right to change our minds. But, consent is not a constant. If we listen closely to what our body is telling us, moment to moment, about situations and relationships we're currently in, we often realize our bodies are no longer giving consent for us to be in them.
This week, Jessica talks about giving ourselves permission to say no after we initially gave a yes. And how to sit with a maybe. There's no shame in the realization you don't want to be doing something any longer. Needing to set it down, for your own health, your own heart, doesn't mean you're fickle. It means you're listening to your ever-evolving needs, at the organismic level, instead of at the personality mind level--which, for women, has meant being inculcated to not disappoint others. Hey, changing your mind to meet your needs is world work. (Shout out to the magnificent Simone Biles!) How can we be a species that evolves if we don't allow ourselves to change when change is required of us?
In this episode, you'll learn how to get curious about what your body is needing NOW, and how to gently work with the information it's giving you. What sensations do you notice when you're consenting to something? What sensations do you notice when you're not?
Jessica also muses aloud on what her heartburn would sound like, if it had a voice.
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The One Day You Finally Knew: For Women Breaking Away podcast is mixed and produced by Jessica Chasnoff, a recovering perfectionist who is always in a learning curve. While she is a psychologist, this podcast is not psychotherapy, and is not a substitute for mental health services. If you're struggling with mental health concerns, please reach out to a professional near you.
Connect with Jessica:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/your_deepest_presence/
Twitter: http://Twitter.com/@deepestpresence
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100070192401240
Website: https://www.DeepestPresence.com

Hi there. I'm Jessica Chasnoff, a psychologist & coach with nearly two decades of experience gently walking alongside women through transitions, often as they contemplate ending romantic partnerships that no longer serve them. Grizzly dog mama, mezzo-soprano, bird enthusiast, maker of art, lover of polarities, puns & dark chocolate, I'm here as your host on this journey.
One day, I finally knew it was time to leave my marriage. Making that decision propelled me into living my own dreaming more fully. I've been ecstatically exploring un-coupledom for several years, partnering with my beloved canine companions, my dear heart friends, the amazing flora & fauna found in the Sonoran desert & my tea-stained, dog-eared collection of the poetry & prose writings of Mary Oliver.
I decided to launch this podcast because of my personal experience, and because I've had a full & thriving practice for many years. Now, I want to be able to reach more women and be a companion to them on their walks. We may have decided to leave something, or someone, but we do not want to feel out at sea as we contemplate, and then make the decision to finally break away. My hope is that you will find the offerings here to be an aid and a balm on your unique and perfect journey home, to yourself.
So, take a walk with me. Let's be companions on this journey. I hope you'll join me. I'm so excited to see what unfolds. In the meantime, feel free to send any questions or connect with me at the links below.
See you soon. :)
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The One Day You Finally Knew: For Women Breaking Away podcast is mixed and produced by Jessica Chasnoff, a recovering perfectionist who is always in a learning curve. While she is a psychologist, this podcast is not psychotherapy, and is not a substitute for mental health services. If you're struggling with mental health concerns, please reach out to a professional near you.
Connect with Jessica:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/your_deepest_presence/
Twitter: http://Twitter.com/@deepestpresence
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100070192401240
Website: https://www.DeepestPresence.com

Our families and our patriarchal society have taught us to have extremely high expectations of ourselves and others. And yet, both can lead to deep disappointment.
What if the expectations we set for ourselves are so high that we must eventually fall from the pedestal we set ourselves upon?
Could it be that we're actually moving along the current of life, doing just fine, and it's not that we're doing a poor job, but the lens we see ourselves through is the problem?
Is it possible that when we get bent out of shape about how others don't do unto us as we would do unto them. . . it's because the standards we hold ourselves to are too high?
And crucially, if we let ourselves off the hook, might we be able to do the same for others more easily?
In this episode, Jessica looks at these questions and the possible answers, along with a couple of important practices. One for empowerment around lowering expectations of yourself and another for increasing self-compassion as you work this growing edge.
P.S. A big thanks to Ecuador for putting me in position 26 for mental health podcasts. Es muy especial para mí, especialmente porque el podcast no está en español. Tal vez algún día haga algunos episodios en español. ¡Muchas gracias!
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The One Day You Finally Knew: For Folx Breaking Away podcast is produced and edited by Jessica Chasnoff, a recovering perfectionist who is always on a learning curve. While she is a psychologist, this podcast is not a substitute for mental health services. If you're struggling with mental health concerns, please reach out to a professional near you.
Connect with Jessica:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/your_deepest_presence/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100070192401240
Website: https://www.DeepestPresence.com