Don't Cut Your Own Bangs

In today's solocast I explore how a 3yr old Facebook memory helped me access joy and appreciation for myself.

May 14th, 2017 I graduated with my masters degree. May 15th, 2017 I started my first day of work as a therapist in private practice. I remember seeing that memory and feeling all at once -

"Oh my God. It's only been 3yrs?"

And also -

"Oh my God. It's ONLY been 3yrs!"

I started thinking about joy. More specifically, what limits joy?

When we want something in our lives so deeply, it can become difficult to hold space for both the desire of a dream coming true and the distance between where we are now and where we want to be.

This can look like:

1. Wanting a meaningful career
2. Wanting a healthy relationship
3. Wanting to start a family

Disappointment, frustration, loneliness, and grief can feel like waves crashing onto shore that wash you out to sea.

What if the absence of joy is cursing the waves, and joy itself is the recognition of learning to ride them?

Here's the link to a podcast I reference being interviewed on -> Career Foresight: Future of work for creative professionals.

I also reference a miscarriage I experienced last year. Not wanting to detail the experience in this episode, I've linked it for you -> A Miscarriage: Shock, loss, grief, and learning.

Today we're talking about mediation.

Have you ever been so stressed that you didn't realize there was a problem until you took a deep breath and felt a tingling sensation throughout your body? ⁣

This is usually what happens: ⁣

1. We experience or witness a stressful event⁣
2. We feel tense, anxious, or overwhelmed⁣
3. Our breathing becomes shallow and constricted. ⁣

When this happens it becomes harder to focus, be present, and aware. In extreme cases this can lead to panic attacks. ⁣

This solocast explores what mediation is (and what it isn't), how it's been beneficial for me personally, and why it might be the best thing to introduce for you overall health and wellbeing.

Don't Cut Your Own Bangs ep. 43 with Tanorria Askew!

After speaking on a panel together for Hive Indy, I was struck by Tanorria's mix of authenticity and humor.

In this week's episode we talk about her career in corporate America, taking a leap of faith to audition for Master Chef Season 7 ... spoiler alert - she made it, and coming home to Indy to combine her passion for for creating connection and building communities around the dinner table.

We talk about what it means to take a leap of faith, what it feels like to tell the truth, and knowing when to say No and when to say Yes.

PS, this episode will be best savored by keeping notepad and a snack handy.

Today's episode dives into pleasure and the role it plays in our lives.

• The way we learn
• The way we connect
• The way we play

When we're stepping out of stress, grief, or feeling overwhelmed, reclaiming pleasure can be one of the most powerful ways to boost endorphins & calm our nerves.

The way we do one thing is often how we do most things. Join me as we tap into pleasure and the impact it has on our mental health.

We continue with a special series of exercises that will be our focus over the coming weeks. With each podcast, I’ll examine one of the seven life themes in The Treasured Journal: career, relationships, love, sex, money, family, and purpose.

Journaling is one of the most powerful tools we have for gaining clarity and understanding of ourselves, which in turn, helps us advocate for ourselves, create space when we need it, and engage in constructive conversations that otherwise might feel overwhelming.

This episode is the first of a two-part look at relationships. It’s where 90% of sessions start with my new clients. People want to talk about heartache, frustration, or anger with regard to their partner or someone else in their life—but ultimately, discussion of the relationship reveals work that needs to be done by the individual. And that’s okay; it’s a good place to start.

We want to be seen and heard and we want other people to be there for us, but we need clarity on what “being there” looks like. So, when journaling about relationships, start with the following prompts:

• What do I really feel?
• What do I really want?
• How can I satisfy that for myself with some small action?

It’s not essential that you use The Treasured Journal for this series of exercises—a plain pad of paper and pen will do. But, if you do use the journal, you can lean on the questions, prompts, and sentence stems that, along with these podcasts, will help you move past the blank page and gain the type of clarity that comes from meaningful self-reflection.

THE TREASURED JOURNAL - https://danielleireland.com/journal

BOOKS I’M READING (visit your local bookseller or library):

• Spare by Prince Harry - https://www.amazon.com/Spare-Prince-Harry-Duke-Sussex/dp/0593593804
• The Myth of Normal by Gabor Maté, MD with Daniel Maté - https://www.amazon.com/Myth-Normal-Illness-Healing-Culture/dp/0593083881
• Good Inside by Dr. Becky Kennedy - https://www.goodinside.com/book/
• The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron - https://juliacameronlive.com/books-by-julia/

CONNECT WITH DANIELLE

• Website: danielleireland.com
• Instagram: @danielleireland_LCSW
• Facebook: @danielleireland_LCSW