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Crystal Paine Show - 159. I got caught in the comparison trap!

159. I got caught in the comparison trap!

03/01/22 • 26 min

Crystal Paine Show

Recently, I was scrolling on my phone and came across the social media account of someone I used to follow years ago. They are in a similar niche as me and back when I followed them, they had a lot fewer followers than me.

But in the last few years, their account has clearly blown up and they had hundreds of thousands more followers than me. Plus, as I was scrolling through their account, I saw that they had super high engagement numbers and interaction.

Instead of being immediately excited for them, I confess I started thinking about how I’m really dropping the ball in being strategic and creative in what I’m posting & that I need to step up my game so I can be growing more online and seeing more engagement like this other person.

And then it hit me: God has called me to be building into and growing other things the past few years — my home, growing as a person, nurturing and loving on the people in my home (and even growing tiny humans!)

I might not have seen a huge increase in followers the past few years, but I’ve spent hours and hours rocking little babies and speaking life to them... and that is very important work.

I might not have seen the crazy engagement numbers that other people have, but I’ve spent the last few years building deep relationships with my older kids and loving two birth mamas and their babies... and that is very important work.

The work that God has called me to right now might not be measurable in numbers that society and experts would consider important (such as accolades, income, awards, product sales, follower count, etc.)... but it matters far more than any of those measurable numbers.

No matter what we’re doing (or not doing), it’s easy to look around and compare our lives to others.

But God hasn’t called you or me to her life. He’s called us to our life.

We’re not supposed to do what she’s doing. We’re called to be faithful where God has us — even if no one sees or notices or thanks us. He sees. He notices. That’s what matters.

All the awards and applause and accolades, all the numbers and name recognition, all the income and opportunities in the world... they don’t hold a candle to faithfulness.

In this episode, we also share about books we're reading, a Spotify playlist I've been loving, and a meal-service we've been loving.

In This Episode

[00:34] - Welcome to another episode of The Crystal Paine Show.

[01:15] - We talk about books we're reading and one I recently read that I just don't know what I think of it.

[06:44] - A Spotify playlist I recently put together with Truths to Remember.

[09:30] - Switching to Spotify and listening to podcasts has freed up a lot of Jesse’s phone space.

[10:17] - Jesse shares about a meal service he's been enjoying.

[16:13] - My experience with comparison.

[17:58] - I should have been excited and celebrating this person's success, instead I went to a negative space.

[20:43] - It was just such a reminder to me that no matter what we're doing, or not doing, it’s easy to look around and compare our lives to others.

[22:30] - A seemingly small thing done in love, faithfulness, and consistency -- it's not small!

Links & Resources

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Recently, I was scrolling on my phone and came across the social media account of someone I used to follow years ago. They are in a similar niche as me and back when I followed them, they had a lot fewer followers than me.

But in the last few years, their account has clearly blown up and they had hundreds of thousands more followers than me. Plus, as I was scrolling through their account, I saw that they had super high engagement numbers and interaction.

Instead of being immediately excited for them, I confess I started thinking about how I’m really dropping the ball in being strategic and creative in what I’m posting & that I need to step up my game so I can be growing more online and seeing more engagement like this other person.

And then it hit me: God has called me to be building into and growing other things the past few years — my home, growing as a person, nurturing and loving on the people in my home (and even growing tiny humans!)

I might not have seen a huge increase in followers the past few years, but I’ve spent hours and hours rocking little babies and speaking life to them... and that is very important work.

I might not have seen the crazy engagement numbers that other people have, but I’ve spent the last few years building deep relationships with my older kids and loving two birth mamas and their babies... and that is very important work.

The work that God has called me to right now might not be measurable in numbers that society and experts would consider important (such as accolades, income, awards, product sales, follower count, etc.)... but it matters far more than any of those measurable numbers.

No matter what we’re doing (or not doing), it’s easy to look around and compare our lives to others.

But God hasn’t called you or me to her life. He’s called us to our life.

We’re not supposed to do what she’s doing. We’re called to be faithful where God has us — even if no one sees or notices or thanks us. He sees. He notices. That’s what matters.

All the awards and applause and accolades, all the numbers and name recognition, all the income and opportunities in the world... they don’t hold a candle to faithfulness.

In this episode, we also share about books we're reading, a Spotify playlist I've been loving, and a meal-service we've been loving.

In This Episode

[00:34] - Welcome to another episode of The Crystal Paine Show.

[01:15] - We talk about books we're reading and one I recently read that I just don't know what I think of it.

[06:44] - A Spotify playlist I recently put together with Truths to Remember.

[09:30] - Switching to Spotify and listening to podcasts has freed up a lot of Jesse’s phone space.

[10:17] - Jesse shares about a meal service he's been enjoying.

[16:13] - My experience with comparison.

[17:58] - I should have been excited and celebrating this person's success, instead I went to a negative space.

[20:43] - It was just such a reminder to me that no matter what we're doing, or not doing, it’s easy to look around and compare our lives to others.

[22:30] - A seemingly small thing done in love, faithfulness, and consistency -- it's not small!

Links & Resources

Previous Episode

undefined - 158. When you feel hurt and offended...

158. When you feel hurt and offended...

Have you noticed how in this modern age of social media, people are so easily hurt, upset, and offended? I know that I’ve fallen prey to knee jerk reactions when scrolling online.

In this episode, Jesse and I talk about this book I’m reading by Brant Hansen called Unoffendable: How Just One Change Can Make All of Life Better. Hansen challenges us to ask the question, “How would it change my life if I chose not to be offended by others?”

Some of you may be thinking, “But how do I even do that? You don’t know what this person has done or said (or not done or not said).” I don’t, but I do know this: We get to choose how we respond. We can’t choose how other people treat us or respond to us or what they say to us or do to us, but we can choose our response.

This doesn’t mean that we let people walk all over us or that we don’t set boundaries, but it does mean that we can choose to either be a victim or a victor. We can choose to either be offended and hurt and upset, or we can acknowledge our feelings, grieve our loss, and choose to forgive.

In this episode, we dive into this topic + we talk about Silas’ recent Science Fair, an early preschool curriculum we started with Kierstyn and are loving, and what’s saving our lives.

In This Episode

[00:34] – Welcome to another episode of The Crystal Paine Show.

[01:03] – Today is the first time we have recorded a podcast — in PJs!

[05:58] – Speaking of PJ’s, we are excited to finally be sleeping through the night again!

[08:07] – But that has come with some crazy dreams for me.

[10:11] – What’s saving our life.

[11:31] – Yesterday we made Oobleck, if you haven’t done that with your kids it is so much fun.

[12:28] – We have been getting a lot of kind feedback from our audience.

[12:54] – I read a couple of notes from our audience.

[15:50] – There are no perfect families, no perfect parents, and no perfect children.

[16:29] – Sponsored Ad: Twigby

[18:46] – Today’s topic is inspired by Brant Hansen’s book, Unoffendable.

[20:47] – Years and years of being on the internet has confirmed this: it’s hard to say anything without offending someone.

[22:41] – I feel like there is some much that we can learn from people on the internet. But it’s so easy for a little thing to turn into a really big thing.

[25:43] – We get to choose how we respond.

[27:58] – It’s okay to acknowledge anger, but it’s what we do with it.

[28:08] – Before rashly reacting, stop... take a breath, and really ask God to help us love others well.

[31:31] – Jesse shares a concept about backing away from an issue when you have an immediate emotional response.

Links & Resources

Sponsor Spotlight: Twigby

Do you wish you could pay less for your phone service? Wishing you could figure out how to get access to great service/coverage without having to break the bank?

I highly recommend checking out Twigby!

Next Episode

undefined - 160. 5 Things I Do Every Morning (Part 2)

160. 5 Things I Do Every Morning (Part 2)

"What does your morning routine look like right now?" "How are you able to fit in the 5 things you do every morning?"

We got a number of questions and followup responses to the episode we recorded recently on 5 Things I Do Every Morning, so we did a followup episode this week answering your questions and sharing more details on what our morning routine looks like right now.

Also on today's episode, I talk about my mixed feelings on a book I finished, Jesse shares about something that he did this past week that really impressed me, and I share about something we've been using for Baby D that has been so helpful!

In This Episode

[00:34] - Welcome to another episode of The Crystal Paine Show.

[01:25] - What dates look like sometimes at this season of life.

[02:54] - Today we are talking about mornings and some follow up questions from a previous podcast episode.

[03:33] - I just finished a book that kind of goes along with today's topic.

[06:09] - I don’t need the motivation to get more done, I need the reminders to slow down.

[07:02] - Jesse did something this past week that really impressed me.

[09:44] - It just reminds you of how much we have to be grateful for.

[10:38] - I share what has been saving my life.

[12:27] - Little things sometimes, that can make a big difference.

[15:45] - Let’s talk about what our mornings look like.

[16:50] - We have had many different renditions, and just get creative every season.

[18:18] - Jesse suggests habit stacking to help set up your routine.

[21:46] - But what does it actually look like?

[23:42] - It helps that we do this divide and conquer thing.

[24:38] - Your nights can set your days up for so much success. A successful day begins the night before.

[25:20] - Jesse shares explains why I consider sleeping in until about 6:45 in the morning.

[28:20] - This is an easy season for us, but you have to make it work for whatever season you are in.

Links & Resources

Sponsor Spotlight: Twigby

Do you wish you could pay less for your phone service? Wishing you could figure out how to get access to great service/coverage without having to break the bank?

I highly recommend checking out Twigby!

Twigby is a company dedicated to providing fantastic phone service at great prices and they are the perfect option for budget consc...

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