Crystal Paine Show

When I got this email in my inbox, I could relate so much -- because I remember being that 8-year-old girl with a very strong personality. And truth be told, I think "headstrong" and "persistent" are two words that can still describe me as a 38-year-old woman!

Oftentimes, we hear people talk about their "strong-willed child" in a way that makes it seem so negative... as if a child's will needs to be broken and replaced. But that's like trying to strip someone of their God-given personality.

I believe that the character qualities of persistence and determination can be such a gift -- to your home, to your community, and to the world. That's why I want to encourage you to stop trying to stifle a child's strong personality and instead embrace the strength that it can bring.

In this episode, Jesse and I share encouragement for parents who are raising strong kids. I share from the perspective of being a strong kid growing up and we both share from the perspective of raising a child who has a very strong personality.

In This Episode:

[02:26] Why Snuggle Sacks have been a life-saver recently.

[04:53] I came down with mastitis on Tuesday, so here's what's been saving my life.

[07:59] My experience getting a Coronavirus test (Spoiler... it was negative!)

[10:59] A book update on Get Out of Your Head.

[14:07] We’re chatting all about raising strong-willed kids.

[16:21] It’s okay if you can't relate with your kids, but seeking to understand them is so important.

[17:16] Why rules for an Enneagram 8 are very restrictive.

[19:29] Change your mindset and see the desire for independence as a blessing.

[21:03] Stop using negative labels to define your kids.

[22:07] How studying personality typings can be so beneficial.

[24:26] Celebrate their strengths because they really are gifts.

[26:11] Say yes as often as possible for your child.

[29:45] Don't overly protect your kids from struggle and failure.

Links and Resources:

• CuddleBug Swaddle Wraps for Babies
• Get Out of Your Head by Jennie Allen
• Reading People by Anne Bogel
• MoneySavingMom.com
• YourBloggingMentor.com
• My Instagram account (I’d love for you to follow me there! I usually hop on at least a few times per day and share behind-the-scenes photos and videos, my grocery store hauls, funny stories, or just anything I’m pondering or would like your advice or feedback on!)
• Have feedback on the show or suggestions for future episodes or topics? Send me an email: [email protected]

But in the last few years, their account has clearly blown up and they had hundreds of thousands more followers than me. Plus, as I was scrolling through their account, I saw that they had super high engagement numbers and interaction.

Instead of being immediately excited for them, I confess I started thinking about how I’m really dropping the ball in being strategic and creative in what I’m posting & that I need to step up my game so I can be growing more online and seeing more engagement like this other person.

And then it hit me: God has called me to be building into and growing other things the past few years — my home, growing as a person, nurturing and loving on the people in my home (and even growing tiny humans!)

I might not have seen a huge increase in followers the past few years, but I’ve spent hours and hours rocking little babies and speaking life to them... and that is very important work.

I might not have seen the crazy engagement numbers that other people have, but I’ve spent the last few years building deep relationships with my older kids and loving two birth mamas and their babies... and that is very important work.

The work that God has called me to right now might not be measurable in numbers that society and experts would consider important (such as accolades, income, awards, product sales, follower count, etc.)... but it matters far more than any of those measurable numbers.

No matter what we’re doing (or not doing), it’s easy to look around and compare our lives to others.

But God hasn’t called you or me to her life. He’s called us to our life.

We’re not supposed to do what she’s doing. We’re called to be faithful where God has us — even if no one sees or notices or thanks us. He sees. He notices. That’s what matters.

All the awards and applause and accolades, all the numbers and name recognition, all the income and opportunities in the world... they don’t hold a candle to faithfulness.

In this episode, we also share about books we're reading, a Spotify playlist I've been loving, and a meal-service we've been loving.

In This Episode

[00:34] - Welcome to another episode of The Crystal Paine Show.

[01:15] - We talk about books we're reading and one I recently read that I just don't know what I think of it.

[06:44] - A Spotify playlist I recently put together with Truths to Remember.

[09:30] - Switching to Spotify and listening to podcasts has freed up a lot of Jesse’s phone space.

[10:17] - Jesse shares about a meal service he's been enjoying.

[16:13] - My experience with comparison.

[17:58] - I should have been excited and celebrating this person's success, instead I went to a negative space.

[20:43] - It was just such a reminder to me that no matter what we're doing, or not doing, it’s easy to look around and compare our lives to others.

[22:30] - A seemingly small thing done in love, faithfulness, and consistency -- it's not small!

Links & Resources

• Books
• The Woman They Could Not Silence: One Woman, Her Incredible Fight For Freedom, and the Men Who Tried to Make Her Disappear by Kate Moore
• The Radium Girls: The Dark Story of America’s Shining Women by Kate Moore
• Total Power by Vince Flynn
• Special Mentions
• Truths to Remember, Spotify Playlist
• Eat to Evolve, meal plans (use coupon code MSM to save 20% off your first order)
• Libby/Overdrive, free public library app
• Other Links
• Love-Centered Parenting
• 10 Days to Be a Happier Mom
• Sign up for the Hot Deals Email List
• MoneySavingMom.com
• My Instagram account (I’d love for you to follow me t...

The biggest thing we've learned is that it takes time (our experience has been 4-6 weeks) to establish a comfortable rhythm and routine, so be patient, and give yourself (and those around you) a lot of grace. We also recommend finding creative ways of keeping track of things. Setting up different stations around your house (such as a feeding station and a diaper-changing station) and using an app to keep track of when each baby is fed, sleeps, has their diaper changed, get their meds, etc. can really help when you are sleep-deprived and caring for multiple babies -- especially if one is medically fragile or has special needs.

On a somewhat related note, we also share lessons learned from a recent trip that we took to Colorado Springs and how we encountered some unexpected obstacles due to having two little ones, so yes, even traveling via plane is going to be different if you have twins! Having two babies at once can feel overwhelming at first, but we promise that you will get into a comfortable groove! It will get so much easier over time, and it will even become natural to you.

Have you had twins or two babies who are almost the same age? If so, I'd love to hear your best tips and strategies!

In This Episode:

[0:35] – Today's topic is advice for having twins.

[2:39] – We just got back from a quick trip to Colorado Springs!

[4:00] – Learn why we couldn't sit together on the plane.

[5:35] – Jesse shares what he learned from our recent trip.

[10:04] – We both share what we're reading, plus some fun emails/messages from listeners!

[16:13] – We answer a question sent in by a listener about why we don't book Airbnbs when we travel.

[19:26] – Now let's talk about our best advice for raising twins...

[21:03] – Expect it to take at least a month to establish a comfortable rhythm.

[23:11] – It was helpful for us to set up different stations around the house.

[24:56] – I recommend keeping a log of when each baby eats, sleeps, has their diaper changed, has medicine, and so forth.

[27:25] – Give yourself and others grace!

[30:18] – You will eventually get into a groove.

[31:04] – The most important thing for us is relying on God and getting to see Him be so faithful!

Links and Resources:

• James Patterson & Bill Clinton - The President Is Missing
• James Patterson & Bill Clinton - The President’s Daughter
• T.J. Menn & Jenn Menn - Faith to Foster: An All-American Story of Loving the Least of These
• Hoopla - Website
• Libby
• Huckleberry: Baby & Child
• Love-Centered Parenting
• 10 Days to Be a Happier Mom
• Sign up for the Hot Deals Email List
• MoneySavingMom.com
• My Instagram account (I’d love for you to follow me there! I usually hop on at least a few times per day and share behind-the-scenes photos and videos, my grocery store hauls, funny stories, or just anything I’m pondering or would like your advice or feedback on!)
• Have feedback on the show or suggestions for future episodes or topics? Send me an email: [email protected]...