Can I Laugh On Your Shoulder? - All Things Money - Answering Your Financial Questions with My Husband, John! | EP. 310

All Things Money - Answering Your Financial Questions with My Husband, John! | EP. 310

08/10/22 • 67 min

Today’s show is an extremely requested episode. My husband, John, is a financial advisor and is here to answer all your money questions. Many of you have emailed and DMed me asking for this episode, so let’s jump into it.

3:11 – Why take financial advice from John?

John is a financial advisor and owns a media company, Third Wheel Media.
He migrated from journalism to interviewing financial advisors. He decided to do the job himself.

5:45 – John’s financial lessons

Both of John’s grandfathers were good with money but in different ways.
One grandfather was good at earning money by selling candy for a living. He was also a good investor.
His other grandfather was good at not spending money. He didn’t make much money but he was a good saver and sent his kids to college.

8:39 – John’s first house

John bought his first house at age 25 and put 20% down.

11:20 – Question: How to budget on one income and make decisions jointly?

This is more of a marriage question. All of the money that comes into the household is joint money, no matter who earned it.
With second marriages, spouses often maintain separate financial lives.

19:36 – Question: Do we have an allowance?

Yes, we each have our own spending money each month.
And yes, we have a monthly budget.
If you have a blow money spending category, you can buy whatever you want.

27:05 – Question: Should kids get an allowance, tithe, etc.?

Our son is 61⁄2, so he doesn’t understand as much about money. Our daughter, who’s older, understands more.
We have kids’ piggy banks – spend (80%), share (10%) and save (10%).

35:15 – Question: What is a good dollar amount for retirement?

No offense, but this is a pointless question because it’s impossible to answer.
John has clients who retired with $175,000 in retirement savings. Most people would say that’s not enough, but they don’t spend much and are happy that way.
John also has clients who aren’t getting much of a Social Security benefit. They have almost $2 million in savings, but they spend a lot each month.

42:38 – Question: Where do I start when living paycheck to paycheck?

People in this boat are often so stressed that they can’t get out of their own way.
There is a path out of debt, but it won’t happen overnight.
Define your priorities (rent, car payment, food, etc.) and increase income.

52:12 – Question: Are you comfortable talking about money with family and friends?

We’ve made money this thing you can’t talk about in our culture, but it isn’t like that in other cultures.
It drives John crazy that families don’t talk about money, and children don’t know the financial situation of their aging parents.
Why can’t we have these generational conversations about money?

56:01 – Question: Should I do a 529 or IRA for kids?

Do a 529 for kids. A Roth IRA is not the best use of this money.

58:14 – Question: How do you save for a vacation when there are other priorities?

You don’t have to spend a bunch of money on a vacation. It can be simple.
If money is that tight, the vacation probably isn’t a priority.

1:04:08 – Question: What to do if my finances feel out of control?

If you’re in financial despair, you don’t have a good command of your numbers.
Find out what you spend on groceries and miscellaneous expenses.
Spend a couple months and look at every expense.

FEATURED QUOTES

There’s always a way out (of debt). The question is, how disciplined and motivated are you to make it happen? – John

If you are in a marriage or partnership ... it has to be a mindset shift where this is our money, and not his money and her money. – Molly

This is why you need a financial advisor. We can figure this stuff out with you and determine what your life looks like and how much money you need. – John

Why can’t we have these generational conversations about money? – John

CONNECT:

https://rosewoodwealthmanagement.com/

Thank you to our partners of the show!

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3:11 – Why take financial advice from John?

John is a financial advisor and owns a media company, Third Wheel Media.
He migrated from journalism to interviewing financial advisors. He decided to do the job himself.

5:45 – John’s financial lessons

Both of John’s grandfathers were good with money but in different ways.
One grandfather was good at earning money by selling candy for a living. He was also a good investor.
His other grandfather was good at not spending money. He didn’t make much money but he was a good saver and sent his kids to college.

8:39 – John’s first house

John bought his first house at age 25 and put 20% down.

11:20 – Question: How to budget on one income and make decisions jointly?

This is more of a marriage question. All of the money that comes into the household is joint money, no matter who earned it.
With second marriages, spouses often maintain separate financial lives.

19:36 – Question: Do we have an allowance?

Yes, we each have our own spending money each month.
And yes, we have a monthly budget.
If you have a blow money spending category, you can buy whatever you want.

27:05 – Question: Should kids get an allowance, tithe, etc.?

Our son is 61⁄2, so he doesn’t understand as much about money. Our daughter, who’s older, understands more.
We have kids’ piggy banks – spend (80%), share (10%) and save (10%).

35:15 – Question: What is a good dollar amount for retirement?

No offense, but this is a pointless question because it’s impossible to answer.
John has clients who retired with $175,000 in retirement savings. Most people would say that’s not enough, but they don’t spend much and are happy that way.
John also has clients who aren’t getting much of a Social Security benefit. They have almost $2 million in savings, but they spend a lot each month.

42:38 – Question: Where do I start when living paycheck to paycheck?

People in this boat are often so stressed that they can’t get out of their own way.
There is a path out of debt, but it won’t happen overnight.
Define your priorities (rent, car payment, food, etc.) and increase income.

52:12 – Question: Are you comfortable talking about money with family and friends?

We’ve made money this thing you can’t talk about in our culture, but it isn’t like that in other cultures.
It drives John crazy that families don’t talk about money, and children don’t know the financial situation of their aging parents.
Why can’t we have these generational conversations about money?

56:01 – Question: Should I do a 529 or IRA for kids?

Do a 529 for kids. A Roth IRA is not the best use of this money.

58:14 – Question: How do you save for a vacation when there are other priorities?

You don’t have to spend a bunch of money on a vacation. It can be simple.
If money is that tight, the vacation probably isn’t a priority.

1:04:08 – Question: What to do if my finances feel out of control?

If you’re in financial despair, you don’t have a good command of your numbers.
Find out what you spend on groceries and miscellaneous expenses.
Spend a couple months and look at every expense.

FEATURED QUOTES

There’s always a way out (of debt). The question is, how disciplined and motivated are you to make it happen? – John

If you are in a marriage or partnership ... it has to be a mindset shift where this is our money, and not his money and her money. – Molly

This is why you need a financial advisor. We can figure this stuff out with you and determine what your life looks like and how much money you need. – John

Why can’t we have these generational conversations about money? – John

CONNECT:

https://rosewoodwealthmanagement.com/

Thank you to our partners of the show!

Previous Episode

The Impact of Laughter | EP 309: Michelle Fortin, Top Knot Comedy

My guest today is Michelle Fortin, an award winning broadcast journalist, speaker, comedian, and actress. Her energetic personality and quick wit keep audiences entertained and encouraged.

She routinely emcees events and conferences, and gives keynote addresses on motherhood, relationships, and faith. She's made numerous TV appearances on shows like Good Morning America, TODAY, The List, and Inside Edition.

In 2019, PHOENIX Magazine named her among the "Great 48" – a list of the Valley's Most Influential People.

As the brunette-half of the popular comedic duo, Leeann & Michelle, you may recognize Michelle from viral parodies and comedic sketches, which have accrued 40 million views.

4:43 – Michelle 101

Michelle lives in Arizona with her husband and two kids.
She started her career as an anchor, reporter and producer. Her dream was to be Katie Couric.
After talking with her former college professor, she became an adjunct professor in communications and got interested in improv.

15:12 – Improv shows

Michelle travels the country doing improv and speaking.

22:30 – Reset the rhythm year

Michelle did nothing for a year, calling it her “reset the rhythm year.”
She did not work and turned down social invitations.
She cooked new meals, played with her kids and slowed down.
It was tough for her because she is a high capacity person who is much better busy than bored.

31:39 – Finding your community

Michelle and her family try to get together with friends often and in an informal way.
She pursues friendships, which can be tough to do as an adult.

41:01 – The best comedy

Jerry Seinfeld once said the best comedy is when you lean your head back, laughig and say, “That’s so true.”

44:54 – Top Knot Comedy

Michelle and Leeann want to bring joy and respite to people through their comedy.
Michelle shares funny memes each week for different enneagrams.

50:07 – Finding humor

Comedians love to find humor where you don’t expect to find humor.

1:04 – Get to know you

Strangest pet peeve? The sound of people clipping their fingernails.
Who would she do a comedy show with? Me, Molly Stillman!

FEATURED QUOTES

It doesn’t matter what your job is .., improv is for everybody.

I’m a high capacity person. I’m much better busy than bored.

Comedians love to find humor where you don’t expect to find humor.

CONNECT:

Thank you to our partners of the show!

I’d like to thank our other partner of the show and that’s Tradlands. Tradlands is an INCREDIBLE sustainable fashion brand that believes in clothing that you can live in NOW and love forever. Clothing that not only makes you feel like your best self, but also fits in a way that flatters. Their gorgeous dresses, pants, tops, and more are designed to move with you throughout your busy days. Their Nico dress is my dress in a love language —not only does it have sleeves, but also POCKETS and you know how I feel about dresses with pockets. I love how comfortable and stylish each piece - and they come in colors like classic neutrals or vibrant hues. One of the things I love most about Tradlands is their focus on sustainability and creating small batch clothing that lasts... they never over produce what they make and focus on only the highest quality materials. And you know how much I love supporting small businesses, too. Check them out at https://tradlands.com/businesswithpurpose and use the code MOLLY20 for 20% off!

Next Episode

The Cost of Control | EP 311: Sharon Hodde Miller

My guest this week is one of my best friends in the world, Sharon Hodde Miller. Sharon is an author, co-pastor at Bright City Church in North Carolina, and she teaches about faith, culture, and the Bible. She is a wife, mom to three kids, and lover of all things Disney.

5:09 – Sharon 201

This is Sharon’s second time on the show.
She has spent the past two years pastoring her church during a pandemic and homeschooling her kids.

8:23 – The Cost of Control book

Sharon’s latest book, The Cost of Control, is about why we crave control, the anxiety it gives us and the real power God promises.
Sharon turned inward and realized she was having big control issues at home with her kids and shouldn't be homeschooling them.

17:50 – Overwhelming information

Every time we open our phones to check social media or the news, we are being overwhelmed with information.

24:05 – Constant access to media

There’s constant negativity on social media, and that makes some people feel a level of control.
We have lost the ability to disagree with each other, and it is costing us our mental health.

37:15 – Coping with loss of control

When we lose control in one area of our life, we often exert control over other areas.
Some people cope with stress by cleaning.
God doesn’t give us control, but He does give us agency.

41:14 – Anxiety and red flags

Anxiety is a big red flag, and your body can tell you a lot about how you’re feeling.
Some people clench their jaw, for example.
You need to name your problem accurately. Don't rush past it.
You are feeling anxious because you are ingesting news all the time.

59:24 – Words of wisdom