The Newlywed Show

Dr. Jeremy Boden PhD, LMFT joins the show to share “The Most Comprehensive Online Marriage Preparation Program for Christian and LDS Couples.” The practical help his classes give students at Utah Valley University inspired him to make the concepts widely accessible (4:45). Dr. Boden explains why he is passionate about this timeframe for couples (9:45) and how he created the course (12:00). He emphasizes its goal of unifying couples (13:30).

His course offers eight modules with videos and “worksheets” (7:20). Grace clarifies what the worksheets are (18:30). The first module after the introductory one is about nurturing your faith as a couple (16:20). The second focuses on the importance of becoming your best self, (since happy and healthy individuals generally make happy and healthy couples) (22:45). The third principle is building and nurturing couple connections, which is more multifaceted than many people think (24:55). The next module covers the six foundational concepts of disconnection and repair—a critical skillset (27:40). Dr. Boden says, “Happy marriages are not about the lack of conflict, but the presence of consistent repair and positive connections.” Module 6 (and Principle 5) is this therapist’s speciality: how to start an amazing sex life after a life of abstinence (30:00). The second to last principle is managing finances as a team (33:30). The final principle focuses on stretching the principles and practices you’ve learned in the course throughout marriage (35:40).

The worth of this course and its cost are stunningly different (41:00). You can access the entire course forever for only $49 at https://marriageandfamilysolutions.teachable.com/. Dr. Boden will continue to create courses so keep up with him at https://www.drjeremyboden.com/.

Thank you for listening to this podcast! Sharing it with a friend or leaving a quick review on iTunes would be deeply appreciated—your small actions help spread the word and keep this show going. Feel free to follow on Instagram @thenewlywedshow and Grace Jensen @gracewjensen. She would love to hear your responses, questions, and ideas!

Chelsea Peterson, a marriage and family therapist and owner of Cache Valley Counseling, joins Grace to discuss a long-awaited topic: how to understand and maneuver different levels of desire in the bedroom.

Mrs. Peterson explains that partners differ in sexual desire far more often than not and that which partner is which can change (8:30). She then dives into the patterns that can arise when this situation is not handled well (12:05) and where the patterns can come from (18:20). (That’s when Good Girl Syndrome is explained.) Thankfully, Mrs. Peterson takes us through how to retrain our brains (31:00).

The brake/gas pedal analogy is helpful in identifying what triggers changes in the bedroom (42:15). After the host and her guest go down a bunny trail about sex and nursing (46:15), Mrs. Peterson helps us lessen judgement around sexual preferences (51:15). Grace reminds us of the long term nature of the sex game and the motivation behind working hard now (57:00). Next, Mrs. Peterson discusses how to maneuver life as a high-desire partner (60:25). In closing, Grace and Mrs. Peterson clarify that no one needs sex, but everyone needs emotional connection (82:45).

Recommended resources on sex (the anatomy and relational sides) are as follows:

Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski (on Amazon here)

And It Was Very Good by Our Earthly Parents (on Amazon here or email Chelsea at [email protected] for a free PDF)

Attached by Amir Levine (on Amazon here)

Passionate Marriage by David Schnarch (on Amazon here)

“The Intimacy Podcast” with Rhonda Farr (link to Apple podcasts here)

Instagram accounts:

@kristinbhodson (website here)

@finalysonfife (website here)

@marriagelaboratory (website here).

Thank you for listening to this podcast! Sharing it with a friend or leaving a quick review on iTunes would be deeply appreciated—it spreads the word and keeps this show going. Follow on Instagram @thenewlywedshow and Grace Jensen @gracewjensen. She would love to hear from you! And a HUGE thank you to Cache Valley Counseling Services for connecting Grace with their therapists to bring information to you! You can reach them at https://www.cvcounselingservices.com/.

You can also support the podcast by snatching up quality, trendy, comfy clothes with a 10% coupon. Check out with code “newlywedshow” at https://www.aliceshootspeople.com/shop/ You can access more discounts and giveaways by joining the shop’s Facebook page, Alice Loves Clothes.

Today’s episode brings Grace and Zach’s practical advice on handling a situation any couple may find themselves in at any time.

After giving background on their situation and experience (2:45), Grace and Zach share tips and tricks on how to accommodate dietary needs in one’s own home (8:05). They cover a variety of areas, including convenience, cost, attitude, and inspiration. As promised, access Grace’s favorite gluten-free and dairy-free foods here. The foodies she mentions are Ashlynn Mitchell (@mamabear.fitness) and Danielle Walker (@daniellewalker).

Next, the couple talks about how to approach people outside of the home—particularly extended family—on your dietary needs. (21:35) It’s important to note that honoring your host’s efforts to support you through vocal gratitude makes a huge difference. (23:25)

Eating out with dietary restrictions requires the same process for a spouse as for someone single. (26:35) The spouse without restrictions is reminded that they are allowed to treat themselves to restaurants unfriendly to their partner’s requirements. (28:25)

Lastly, Grace reminds us to be aware of our mental and emotional relationship with food. (31:40) You don’t need to eat a food just because it’s in front of you.

To wrap up the episode, our hosts then give us a little life update! (34:00) Zach could use contacts at Northrop Grumman in San Diego, and cute Jackie videos can be found on her mama’s Instagram @gracewjensen

To help this podcast continue and grow, please follow it on Instagram @thenewlywedshow, comment, share with friends—anything helps. And don’t forget to check out Pretties by Courtney at prettiesbycourtney.com and @prettiesbycourtney to get 40% off anything with code “newlywedshow”. Thank you for your support!

Being newlyweds when you're both in school can be challenging because most of us weren't raised watching both of our parents manage the ebb and flow of being students and working at the same time. And sometimes we forget our spouse is just as busy as we are! Grace and Zach discuss their journey of figuring out how their household would function, how they both would pay for school (13:34), and finding the best balance of work, school, and spending time together. Sometimes when school gets demanding and intense, sacrifices have to be made. The key to making your marriage and household function well is communication and teamwork, as Grace and Zach elaborate on in this episode.

Today Grace and Zach share a variety of audiobooks and podcasts that may help you in your marriage and life. This week’s “We’re in it With Ya” story is of a conversation in which Zach used communication tactics he’s learning from “Never Split the Difference: Negotiating as if Your Life Depended on It” by Chris Voss with Tahl Raz (2:40).

Our hosting couple first shares several podcasts and podcast episodes. The initial few are episodes from Dax Shepherd’s podcast series “Experts on Experts.” The interviews are as follows:

John Gottman (on his research about what predicts happy marriages)

Esther Perel (on sex)

Jennifer Newsom (on gender roles and stereotypes)

Adam Grant (on introversion, criticism, and more)

Grace also recommends these podcasts:

“The Betrayed, the Addicted, and the Expert” with Ashlynn and Coby (a couple) and Brannon (a therapist)

“The Rise Together Podcast” with Rachel and Dave Hollis

“Mormon Marriages” with Angilyn and Nate Bagley

Grace HIGHLY recommends this episode on motherhood from the podcast “Q.More” with Rosemary Card and Dr. Julie Hanks:

‘The Highest and Holiest Calling’

Next are audiobooks that can all be found on Audible.

“The Good News about Marriage” by Shaunti Feldhahn and Tally Whitehead - A research-based book debunking negative myths on marriage.

“The Power of Vulnerability” by Brene Brown - A collection of live speeches by a shame researcher. If feelings are not your favorite place to be, give Brene Brown a shot. Grace and Zach would not be married without her.

“The Gifts of Imperfection” by Brene Brown (narrated by someone else) - A foundational book for Brene’s work.

“Daring Greatly” by Brene Brown - Focuses on the strength and importance of vulnerability.

“Men, Women, and Worthiness: The Experience of Shame and the Power of Being Enough” by Brene Brown - A collection of live recordings on how men and women experience shame differently, and how they enforce each other’s shame stories.

“To Have and to Hold: Motherhood, Marriage, and the Modern Dilemma” by Molly Millwood - Shares research and information on how to better make the transition into parenthood as a couple.

“Real Love: the truth about finding unconditional love and fulfilling relationships” by Greg Baer

“The Four Tendencies: The indispensable personality profiles that reveal how to make your life better (and other people’s lives better, too)” by Gretchen Rubin - A highly useful book profiling how different people are motivated. Grace and Zach talked about it in Episode 20.

“The Five Love Languages: the secret to love that lasts” by Gary Chapman - Required reading if you have any loved ones.

Grace and Zach end by wishing you happy holidays! Thanks for listening. If you enjoy this podcast, it would mean the world to Grace if you did one of two things to help other people find it: either screenshot this episode and share it , or leave a rating and review on iTunes. It makes a big difference! You can connect with the podcast on Instagram @thenewlywedshow and the show’s host @gracewjensen. Thank you again.