Podcasts and Audiobooks for a Better Marriage

12/18/19 • 43 min

Today Grace and Zach share a variety of audiobooks and podcasts that may help you in your marriage and life. This week’s “We’re in it With Ya” story is of a conversation in which Zach used communication tactics he’s learning from “Never Split the Difference: Negotiating as if Your Life Depended on It” by Chris Voss with Tahl Raz (2:40).

Our hosting couple first shares several podcasts and podcast episodes. The initial few are episodes from Dax Shepherd’s podcast series “Experts on Experts.” The interviews are as follows:

John Gottman (on his research about what predicts happy marriages)

Esther Perel (on sex)

Jennifer Newsom (on gender roles and stereotypes)

Adam Grant (on introversion, criticism, and more)

Grace also recommends these podcasts:

“The Betrayed, the Addicted, and the Expert” with Ashlynn and Coby (a couple) and Brannon (a therapist)

“The Rise Together Podcast” with Rachel and Dave Hollis

“Mormon Marriages” with Angilyn and Nate Bagley

Grace HIGHLY recommends this episode on motherhood from the podcast “Q.More” with Rosemary Card and Dr. Julie Hanks:

‘The Highest and Holiest Calling’

Next are audiobooks that can all be found on Audible.

“The Good News about Marriage” by Shaunti Feldhahn and Tally Whitehead - A research-based book debunking negative myths on marriage.

“The Power of Vulnerability” by Brene Brown - A collection of live speeches by a shame researcher. If feelings are not your favorite place to be, give Brene Brown a shot. Grace and Zach would not be married without her.

“The Gifts of Imperfection” by Brene Brown (narrated by someone else) - A foundational book for Brene’s work.

“Daring Greatly” by Brene Brown - Focuses on the strength and importance of vulnerability.

“Men, Women, and Worthiness: The Experience of Shame and the Power of Being Enough” by Brene Brown - A collection of live recordings on how men and women experience shame differently, and how they enforce each other’s shame stories.

“To Have and to Hold: Motherhood, Marriage, and the Modern Dilemma” by Molly Millwood - Shares research and information on how to better make the transition into parenthood as a couple.

“Real Love: the truth about finding unconditional love and fulfilling relationships” by Greg Baer

“The Four Tendencies: The indispensable personality profiles that reveal how to make your life better (and other people’s lives better, too)” by Gretchen Rubin - A highly useful book profiling how different people are motivated. Grace and Zach talked about it in Episode 20.

“The Five Love Languages: the secret to love that lasts” by Gary Chapman - Required reading if you have any loved ones.

Grace and Zach end by wishing you happy holidays! Thanks for listening. If you enjoy this podcast, it would mean the world to Grace if you did one of two things to help other people find it: either screenshot this episode and share it , or leave a rating and review on iTunes. It makes a big difference! You can connect with the podcast on Instagram @thenewlywedshow and the show’s host @gracewjensen. Thank you again.

Our hosting couple first shares several podcasts and podcast episodes. The initial few are episodes from Dax Shepherd’s podcast series “Experts on Experts.” The interviews are as follows:

John Gottman (on his research about what predicts happy marriages)

Esther Perel (on sex)

Jennifer Newsom (on gender roles and stereotypes)

Adam Grant (on introversion, criticism, and more)

Grace also recommends these podcasts:

“The Betrayed, the Addicted, and the Expert” with Ashlynn and Coby (a couple) and Brannon (a therapist)

“The Rise Together Podcast” with Rachel and Dave Hollis

“Mormon Marriages” with Angilyn and Nate Bagley

Grace HIGHLY recommends this episode on motherhood from the podcast “Q.More” with Rosemary Card and Dr. Julie Hanks:

‘The Highest and Holiest Calling’

Next are audiobooks that can all be found on Audible.

“The Good News about Marriage” by Shaunti Feldhahn and Tally Whitehead - A research-based book debunking negative myths on marriage.

“The Gifts of Imperfection” by Brene Brown (narrated by someone else) - A foundational book for Brene’s work.

“Daring Greatly” by Brene Brown - Focuses on the strength and importance of vulnerability.

“To Have and to Hold: Motherhood, Marriage, and the Modern Dilemma” by Molly Millwood - Shares research and information on how to better make the transition into parenthood as a couple.

“Real Love: the truth about finding unconditional love and fulfilling relationships” by Greg Baer

“The Five Love Languages: the secret to love that lasts” by Gary Chapman - Required reading if you have any loved ones.

Previous Episode

In-Laws Invading! In-Laws Invading! ft. Dr. Scott Woolley

Couples therapist Dr. Scott Woolley returns to the show to discuss how to deal with intrusive in-laws. The interview is preluded by Grace and Zach’s new segment “We’re In It With Ya” (1:20). They analyze their communication skills during a vulnerable and sensitive situation (8:20). Grace then shares Dr. Woolley’s credentials (12:05).

Grace’s first question is why some in-laws feel entitled to deep involvement in their children’s marriages and lives (15:30) Dr. Woolley’s answer includes the in-laws’ own experience with their in-laws (16:40) and insecurity (20:15).

The two then turn to how to navigate situations where the in-laws encroach upon the couple’s time (24:45). Dr. Woolley recommends that the biological child of the in-laws does the talking when approaching their parents (25:15). He also talks about what to do when only one spouse feels the in-laws’ behavior is unacceptable (27:05). A common trap is debating what is “normal,” when what really matters is how the behavior feels—does it feel respectful or disrespectful? (30:00) Relating to that, Dr. Woolley identifies a key question that drives most marital disputes (32:15). He also spends some time talking about the importance of being aware of cultural differences (36:10).

Next, in-laws intruding into the home is discussed (40:00). The nuances of how to talk to the in-laws are traversed again. Grace and Dr. Woolley then turn to dealing with in-laws whose opinions feel intrusive and controlling (45:05). After outlining strategies, he reminds us to keep perspective (53:30). Finally, Grace presents the situation of an in-law breaking boundaries that were set up for safety reasons (58:00). Dr. Woolley ends the episode with a message of hope (63:15).

Thank you for listening to this episode of the Newlywed Show! If you enjoyed it, it would mean the world to Grace if you did one of two things to help other people find the podcast: either screenshot this episode and share it with someone you think it would be helpful for, or leave a rating and review on iTunes. It makes a big difference! You can connect with the podcast on Instagram @thenewlywedshow and the show’s host @gracewjensen. Thank you again.

Next Episode

Getting Out of a Relationship Funk

Happy 2020! Today Grace brings you strategie on how to reconnect and get out of a relationship funk. Let’s get a good year going! Grace gives an update on her life (2:15). She and Zach have moved to San Diego and are enjoying being among family.

The first tip on how to reconnect is probably the most obvious—weekly date nights (6:20). Newlyweds may not feel this practice is important, but as life becomes more of a routine, connection should be a priority on the schedule. The next piece of advice is to create your own traditions (8:05). Third, meet weekly to talk about schedules, plans, logistics, and kids (9:45). This will allow couples to spend their date nights enjoying each other rather than discussing the domestic scene. Finally, one therapist recommended not complaining about your spouse on social media, and another even suggested having joint social media accounts (11:20). In talking about social media use, Grace recalls the need she felt early in her marriage for examples of happy couples with very different personalities. For those who feel the same need she recommends episode 16 of this podcast.

Next, Grace shares couples’ New Year’s resolutions from friends and family to give you more ideas on how to realign. (14:15) If your spouse is resistant to goal-setting in the New Year, episode 20 will be a treasure for your marriage (15:20). One couple wishes to be more spiritually aligned with studying scripture together (16:05). Kelbie from episode 2 and her husband are setting micro-goals to pay off specific debt while making sure to enjoy life (17:45). An elderly widower commented on the importance of balance between goal-setting, connecting, and personal growth (19:00). Meghan and Mickayeen from episode 16 set yearly intentions and bi-weekly meetings to check in on their progress (21:05). Another couple reward themselves upon reaching milestones (22:15).

Grace ends with a slew of ideas from other sources: record when you learn new things about each other (25:00), add a new couple to your social circle (25:25), take a risk together (25:40), write down memories of the last year (27:30), read and discuss a helpful book about relationships/marriage (28:50), choose a cause to volunteer for together (30:30), host a dinner party for other couples (31:25), break a bad habit together (33:00), commit to being spontaneous (33:15), monthly money talks (follow @ameskiefer on Instagram) (34:15), practice gratitude regularly (35:35).

Thank you for listening to this podcast! Sharing it with a friend or leaving a quick review on iTunes would be deeply appreciated—it spreads the word and keeps this show going. Follow on Instagram @thenewlywedshow and Grace Jensen @gracewjensen. She would love to hear your responses, questions, and ideas.

Another way to support the podcast is to use the Newlywed Show shop. This dream resource includes every product recommended throughout the podcast. Access now at https://www.amazon.com/shop/gracewjensen It’s clearly organized by topic and kept up to date. Enjoy!