Partnered with a Survivor: David Mandel and Ruth Reymundo Mandel - Season 5, Episode 10: Beyond Presence: Redefining Responsible Fatherhood in a Domestic Abuse-Informed World

Season 5, Episode 10: Beyond Presence: Redefining Responsible Fatherhood in a Domestic Abuse-Informed World

10/23/24 • 63 min

Partnered with a Survivor: David Mandel and Ruth Reymundo Mandel

📝 In this thought-provoking episode, we explore the nuanced intersection of father engagement and domestic abuse-informed practice with Chris Brown, President of the National Fatherhood Initiative (NFI). Our conversation examines how we can thoughtfully promote father involvement while maintaining high standards for men as parents, disrupting gender double standards and keeping the safety and long term wellbeing of children at the center.
🎯 **Key Topics:**
• The historical context behind NFI's founding and evolution of fatherhood programs
• Examining father absence through a domestic abuse-informed lens
• Balancing father engagement with survivor safety and well-being
• The importance of holding perpetrators accountable as parents
• Building community capacity to support safe, stable father involvement
💭 **Notable Quotes:**
"We need to acknowledge fathers as key caregivers while having high expectations for their behavior as parents. Supporting father involvement can't come at the expense of adult and child survivor safety." - David Mandel
"When we talk about father absence, we have to look at the whole picture - including how perpetrator patterns of coercive control contribute to family separation." - Ruth Reymundo Mandel
✨ **Key Takeaways:**
• The need to integrate domestic abuse screening and safety protocols into fatherhood programs
• How gender bias impacts our expectations of fathers vs mothers
• The importance of early intervention to develop parenting skills in boys and young men
• Strategies for practitioners to engage fathers while partnering with survivors
📚 **Resources Mentioned:**
• Safe & Together's Working with Men as Parents training
• Multiple Pathways to Harm framework
• NFI's fatherhood program resources
• Domestic abuse-informed engagement strategies
🔗 **Connect with NFI:**
[https://www.fatherhood.org/](https://www.fatherhood.org/)
🔗 **Connect with Safe & Together Institute:**
[https://safeandtogetherinstitute.com/](https://safeandtogetherinstitute.com/)
[https://academy.safeandtogetherinstitute.com/pages/home](https://academy.safeandtogetherinstitute.com/pages/home)
Join us next time as we continue exploring domestic

Join us in-person or online 18-20 March 2025 for the Safe & Together Institute Coercive Control and Children Conference. The event includes a family law track featuring judicial leadership, survivors and lawyers. Whether in Australia or across the globe, you will gain 12 month access to recordings of every session. Register now!

Now available! Mapping the Perpetrator’s Pattern: A Practitioner’s Tool for Improving Assessment, Intervention, and Outcomes The web-based Perpetrator Pattern Mapping Tool is a virtual practice tool for improving assessment, intervention, and outcomes through a perpetrator pattern-based approach. The tool allows practitioners to apply the Model’s critical concepts and principles to their current case load in real

Check out David Mandel's new book "Stop Blaming Mothers and Ignoring Fathers: How to transform the way we keep children safe from domestic violence."
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Season 5, Episode 9: Partnering vs. Practicing: The Hidden Bias in Professional Crisis Work

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🔄 Transforming Professional Standards
Join us from São Miguel, Azores, Ruth's paternal ancestral home, as we challenge conventional metrics of professionalism and explore how institutional practices, mandates, best practices often reinforce dangerous barriers between professionals and survivors of domestic abuse. We examine what true Partnership looks like when we step beyond traditional professional boundaries.
📊 Measuring What Matters:
• Evaluating professional success through survivor partnership outcomes
• Identifying KPIs, practices & policies that perpetuate professional bias & poor outcomes
• Tracking meaningful engagement and Impact versus procedural compliance, top down best practices not tied to end user experience
🚫 Confronting Professional Bias:
• Recognizing when "professionalism" becomes a barrier to authentic connection
• Understanding how institutional metrics can reinforce harmful power dynamics
• Examining personal and systemic prejudices in professional practice
⚖️ Institutional Accountability:
• Creating measurements for authentic survivor engagement
• Developing metrics that value survivor voice and choice
• Establishing KPIs that promote genuine Partnering
💡 Shifting Professional Culture:
• Moving from expert-driven top-down practice to Partnering and end user impact-based practice
• Redefining success in professional-survivor relationships
• Building institutional, training and policy support for transformative practice
🎯 Action Steps for Change:
• Implementing survivor-centered performance metrics
• Developing reflection tools for professional bias
• Creating accountability systems for authentic partnership
Join our global network as we work to transform how professionals engage with survivors and measure success in domestic abuse-informed practice.
🔗 Access our professional development resources at https://safeandtogetherinstitute.com/
📱 Connect with our community of practice at https://academy.safeandtogetherinstitute.com/pages/home?preview=true
#ProfessionalismRedefined #SystemsChange #Partnering #Professionalstandards #Bestpractices #SafeAndTogether

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Season 5 Episode 11: Empowering Children: Healing from Domestic Abuse with Dr. Asha Patel

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Unlock the secrets to supporting children affected by domestic abuse with insights from Dr. Asha Patel, CEO of Innovating Minds. In this episode, we explore innovative approaches like the Healing Together program, which integrates trauma-informed principles, neuroscience, and attachment models to help children manage their emotions. Dr. Patel shares her journey from working with high-profile offenders to founding Innovating Minds, with a mission to provide early support for children often mislabeled as "naughty" and excluded from education. Discover how digital access is pivotal for equitable scalability and the importance of training frontline practitioners to extend the program's reach.
We'll shed light on the complex challenges of providing timely support to children exposed to domestic abuse and the critical role of supportive relationships in their healing process. Misconceptions about waiting for the perfect moment to offer help are debunked, and the necessity of multiple pathways to access programs, beyond court orders, is underscored. The conversation also delves into the hurdles marginalized communities face with official systems and highlights the importance of trauma-informed and domestic abuse-informed approaches within mental health services.
Explore the profound impact of early intervention and prevention models across the UK, focusing on the integration of the Healing Together program in schools and children's homes. We examine the unique trauma children face when in contact with abusive parents and the potential for misdiagnoses. Understand the importance of recognizing trauma in the context of coercive control, beyond just physical abuse. Finally, we emphasize the power of fostering healing through mindful practices and how resilience and recovery can be significantly enhanced for both child survivors and their caregivers.
Learn more about Innovating Minds and the Healing Together programme
Related Episodes
Season 5 Episode 7: Childhood Domestic Violence Exposure is “Pivotal”: An Interview with Professor Higgins