Overcoming Fears and Worries to Say YES

09/19/24 • 49 min

How can parents overcome their fears and worries so they can say YES to their boys’ interests and passions?

That’s the question we discuss with Heather Sponholz, a “boy mom” who’s said yes to her teenage sons’ solo National Parks trips, MMA fighting, and ambitious Christmas lights project.

Takeaways:

Navigating the balance between freedom and safety for teenagers can be challenging for parents.
Allowing teenagers to take solo trips can help them develop independence and learn important life skills.
Trusting in your child’s ability to navigate challenges and make responsible decisions is essential.
Supporting teenagers in pursuing their passions and interests can have a positive impact on their personal growth. Supporting and nurturing boys’ passions and interests is important for their personal growth and development.
Parents should overcome their fears and worries and allow their children to pursue activities that they are passionate about.
Community support and mentorship can play a crucial role in helping boys pursue their interests.
Parents should prioritize their children’s passions and provide them with the necessary resources and opportunities to explore and excel in their chosen fields.
Allowing boys to face challenges and learn from their experiences helps them develop problem-solving skills and resilience.

Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:

Encouraging Independence — ON BOYS episode

Autonomy-Supportive Parenting — ON BOYS episode

Step In or Step Back? — ON BOYS episode

Age 16 & Learning to Let Go — BuildingBoys post

Sponsor Spotlight: Lumen

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Sponsor Spotlight: Armoire

Clothing rental subscription that makes getting dressed easier. Visit armoire.style/ONBOYS to get up to 50% OFF your first month.

Sponsor Spotlight: Artifact Uprising

1st time buyers get 20% off (& returning customers get 15% off) with code ONBOYS

Sponsor Spotlight: IXL

The world’s most popular subscription-based learning site for K–12! Get 20% off at ixl.com/TODAY

Sponsor Spotlight: Avoila
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

How can parents overcome their fears and worries so they can say YES to their boys’ interests and passions?

That’s the question we discuss with Heather Sponholz, a “boy mom” who’s said yes to her teenage sons’ solo National Parks trips, MMA fighting, and ambitious Christmas lights project.

Takeaways:

Navigating the balance between freedom and safety for teenagers can be challenging for parents.
Allowing teenagers to take solo trips can help them develop independence and learn important life skills.
Trusting in your child’s ability to navigate challenges and make responsible decisions is essential.
Supporting teenagers in pursuing their passions and interests can have a positive impact on their personal growth. Supporting and nurturing boys’ passions and interests is important for their personal growth and development.
Parents should overcome their fears and worries and allow their children to pursue activities that they are passionate about.
Community support and mentorship can play a crucial role in helping boys pursue their interests.
Parents should prioritize their children’s passions and provide them with the necessary resources and opportunities to explore and excel in their chosen fields.
Allowing boys to face challenges and learn from their experiences helps them develop problem-solving skills and resilience.

Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:

Encouraging Independence — ON BOYS episode

Autonomy-Supportive Parenting — ON BOYS episode

Step In or Step Back? — ON BOYS episode

Age 16 & Learning to Let Go — BuildingBoys post

Sponsor Spotlight: Lumen

Understand your metabolism! Go to lumen.me/ONBOYS to save 15% on Lumen

Sponsor Spotlight: Armoire

Clothing rental subscription that makes getting dressed easier. Visit armoire.style/ONBOYS to get up to 50% OFF your first month.

Sponsor Spotlight: Artifact Uprising

1st time buyers get 20% off (& returning customers get 15% off) with code ONBOYS

Sponsor Spotlight: IXL

The world’s most popular subscription-based learning site for K–12! Get 20% off at ixl.com/TODAY

Sponsor Spotlight: Avoila
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Previous Episode

“Be A Man” Project Helps Us Understand Teen Boys

SheKnows’ “Be a Man” project is an “exploration of what it means to be a man today,” says Erika Janes, a “boy mom” and SheKnows editor-in-chief.

Importantly, the project includes teen boys and gives them an opportunity to share their thoughts about manhood and masculinity. Perhaps unsurprisingly, the boys’ responses reflect our still-evolving understanding of gender. Crying, for instance, is still seen as a term with strongly feminine connotations, “but almost every boy we talked to said that they did cry,” Janes says. “They still feel like there’s a stigma to boys and men crying, but for the most part, almost of all of them said, ‘I cry at times.'”

Boys, she says, “still get so many messages about traditional masculinity — ‘don’t cry, be strong, be a man.’ But they need to be allowed to express healthy emotion, to express vulnerability, to be able to cry and express sadness. We need to understand and accept that teen boys have all the same emotions as teen girls and that it’s healthier if they have outlets to express them.”

Takeaways:

The Be A Man project on She Knows provides a comprehensive look into the lives of teen boys, covering topics such as masculinity, mental health, and social media.
It is important to include and listen to teen boys in conversations about their experiences and perspectives.
Parents of boys may face challenges in understanding and raising boys, but it is important to provide support and guidance.
The project aims to provide advice and resources for parents navigating these topics with their teen boys.

Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:

We Asked 4 Teen Boys to Test New Fall Fragrances – Here’s What They Said – SheKnows article

The Response to Tim Walz’s Son’s Proud Tears at the DNC is a Telling Look at Masculinity & Emotion — SheKnows article

How Teen Boys View Male Celebrities & Masculinity, from Ryan Reynolds to Timothee Chalamet — SheKNow article

Gender Equality, Boys, & Men — ON BOYS episode featuring Richard V. Reeves

BoyMom Ruth Whippman on Reimaging Boyhood — ON BOYS episode

Dr. Niobe Way on Reimagining Boys — ON BOYS episode

Sponsor Spotlight: Lumen

Understand your metabolism! Go to lumen.me/ONBOYS to save 15% on Lumen

Sponsor Spotlight: Armoire

Clothing rental subscription that makes getting dressed easier. Visit armoire.style/ONBOYS to get up to 50% OFF your first month.

Sponsor Spotlight: AvoilaSponsor Spotlight: Artifact Uprising

1st time buyers get 20% off (& returning customers get 15% off) with code ONBOYS

Sponsor Spotlight: IXL

The world’s most popular subscription-based learning site for K–12! Get 20% off at ixl.com/TODAY

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Next Episode

Helping Boys Thrive at Any Size

Kids can thrive at any size, says Jill Castle, a pediatric dietician, parent, and author of Kids Thrive at Any Size: How to Nourish Your Big, Small, or In-Between Child for a Lifetime of Health & Happiness.

Takeaways:

Feeding kids in a healthy way can be challenging, but it’s important to raise children of all sizes to be physically healthy and emotionally well.
Family culture plays a significant role in shaping children’s attitudes towards food and body size.
Body neutrality focuses on the functionality of the body rather than its appearance, promoting acceptance and self-love.
Growth charts are a tool for tracking a child’s growth over time, but they should not be used to define a child’s health or worthiness.
Parents can advocate for their children by addressing biases and stigma related to body size, both within the extended family and in healthcare settings.
Creating a positive meal environment and supporting children’s individual appetites can help build healthy eating habits.
Parents should prioritize sleep, as it plays a crucial role in children’s growth and appetite regulation.
Health should be measured by factors beyond weight, such as blood pressure, respiratory rate, and cardiovascular fitness.

Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:

jillcastle.com — Jill’s website

Kids Thrive at Any Size: How to Nourish Your Big, Small, or In-Between Child for a Lifetime of Health & Happiness — Jill’s latest book

The Nourished Child — Jill’s podcast

Picky Eaters, Family Meals, & Nutrition — ON BOYS episode

Sponsor Spotlight: Lumen

Understand your metabolism! Go to lumen.me/ONBOYS to save 15% on Lumen

Sponsor Spotlight: Armoire

Clothing rental subscription that makes getting dressed easier. Visit armoire.style/ONBOYS to get up to 50% OFF your first month.

Sponsor Spotlight: Avoila

Use code ONBOYS to save 10% when you shop Avoila Nourishing Face Oil

Sponsor Spotlight: Artifact Uprising