Splintering Grief - DJ Arsene Versailles & Marked By COVID

04/07/22 • 28 min

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Lingering. Shivering. Simmering. Splintering.

These are the words DJ Arsene Versailles wrote to describe grief after his mother, Florcie Yves Versailles, died of COVID-19 in May of 2020. This grief was and continues to be layered - as most grief is - and some of these layers are specific to his mom being a Black woman who died during a pandemic, of a disease that has come to be so much more than just a medical diagnosis.

DJ's mom was committed to social justice and this inspired him to do similar work in the wake of her death. After meeting Kristin Urquiza, co-founder of Marked by COVID, he became involved in their effort to establish a COVID Memorial Day.

Listen to DJ's interview with Sarah Betancourt. Learn more about Marked by COVID.

Lingering. Shivering. Simmering. Splintering.

Listen to DJ's interview with Sarah Betancourt. Learn more about Marked by COVID.

Previous Episode

"The Silent Third Parent" - A Family Blended By Grief

Anne Gudger was pregnant with her first child, Jake, when her husband Kent died in a car crash. Years later she met and married Scott and they had a daughter, Maria. Fast forward to March of 2020, the beginning of the pandemic, when Anne and Maria found themselves drinking a lot of coffee and talking about grief. Those conversations inspired them to start Coffee and Grief, a Facebook group for folks wanting to connect around loss. The Facebook group grew into a series of curated readings called Coffee Talk where writers share short pieces about anything in the realm of grief. Maria and Anne are funny and warm and somehow make talking about grief feel comfortable. In our conversation we discuss:

What it was like raising Jake as a young widow.
How Kent's memory acts as the silent third parent in their blended family.
Why community matters when it comes to loss.
How writing can help people integrate grief.

Read Anne's writing at Anne Gudger

Join the Coffee and Grief Facebook group or visit their public Coffee and Grief page to learn more about readings and their 30-day writing classes.

Next Episode

Trauma & Grief - Meghan Riordan Jarvis, LCSW

Being a plumber doesn’t mean the pipes in your house never leak. Being a landscaper doesn’t mean your own yard is magically free of weeds. Why is it then that those of us who work in grief sometimes fall prey to the magical thinking that we will somehow be immune to the heartbreak when someone dies?

Meghan Riordan Jarvis, LCSW, is a trauma-informed psychotherapist with over 20 years of clinical experience who harbored the same secret wish. A wish which imploded when her mother died in 2019, just two years after her dad died of cancer. While Meghan’s training and clinical acumen didn’t prevent her from experiencing grief, they did enable her to recognize when she started to develop PTSD – post traumatic stress disorder – and that she needed additional help.

In our conversation, we talk about: - What was different about grieving after her father’s death vs. her mother’s. - How she recognized the signs of PTSD and the treatment she sought out. - The concept of “meaning making” and how it’s important to clarify what types of meaning are supportive and which can be harmful.

In addition to being a trauma therapist, Meghan is a fellow grief podcaster and her show is called Grief Is My Side Hustle. Her memoir is due to be out in the world in 2023.

Grief is My Side Hustle website Grief is My Side Hustle podcast @meghan.riordan.jarvis on IG @griefismysidehustle on Fbook