12 Dorks of Christmas

Explicit content warning

12/21/22 • 62 min

On the first dork of Christmas my true dork gave to me: a holiday dork special! Lexi & Ben run down the best and worst holiday music, food, movies, characters, traditions and alternatives. Happy Solstice!

FURTHER DORKSCUSSION:

The 12 Dorks of Christmas:

Best:

Food: Stuffing (Ben), Nuts & Bolts (Lexi)
Movie: Muppet Family Christmas (Lexi), A Muppet Christmas Carol (Ben)
Song: I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas by Gayla Peevey (Lexi), Carol of the Bells (Ben)
Character: Zero from Nightmare Before Christmas (Lexi), Ice-Type Jesus (Ben)
Tradition: Opening one gift on Christmas Eve (Ben), Christmas morning (Lexi)
Alternative: Solstice (Lexi & Ben)

Worst:

Food: Cheap Christmas candy (Lexi), Gingerbread House kits (Ben)
Movie: Santa Claus Is Comin' to Town (Lexi), Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer (Ben)
Song: I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas by Gayla Peevey (Ben), I'm Getting Nuttin' For Christmas (Lexi)
Character: Billy Bob Thornton as Bad Santa (Lexi), Tim Allen as Santa Claus (Ben)
Tradition: Pictures with mall Santas (Lexi), Getting together with family (Ben)
Alternative: Sitting at home crying (Ben), Being sick for Christmas (Lexi)

BONUS CONTENT:

Jess' picks:

Best:

Food: Sticky buns (Christmas Day breakfast since I was a kid)
Movie: Nightmare Before Christmas
Song: Christmas Without You by Dolly Parton and Kenny Rogers
Character: The Grinch
Tradition: My mom gives everyone really elaborate stockings with little trinkets and snacks and we open them all together - it's v cute
Alt: Hanukkah (one of my aunts and my cousins are Jewish and I think it's a dope holiday)

Worst:

Food: chocolate oranges
Movie: Jingle All the Way (one of the worst movies I've ever seen, period)
Song: All I Want For Christmas Is You - I can't really describe why but something about this song just is like nails on a chalkboard to me
Character: Frosty the Snowman (just like so cloying in every interpretation)
Tradition: My family plays Monopoly on Christmas Day and it's SO LONG AND TERRIBLE
Alt: Boxing Day

SOCIALS:

Here's where you can find us!

Lexi' Hunt's website and twitter and instagram
Ben Rankel's website and instagram and where to buy his book: Amazon.ca / Comixology / Ind!go / Renegade Arts
Jess Schmidt's website, twitter and instagram
Dork Matter's website(WIP) and twitter and instagram and reddit

Having fun dorking out with Lexi & Ben? Help us get the word out by giving Dork Matters a rating and review on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your pods. We'd appreciate it!

“I'm going to tear off your skin like wrapping paper and deck the halls with your guts!” - Robot Santa

SOCIALS:

Here's where you can find us!

Lexi' Hunt's website and twitter and instagram
Ben R...

FURTHER DORKSCUSSION:

The 12 Dorks of Christmas:

Best:

Food: Stuffing (Ben), Nuts & Bolts (Lexi)
Movie: Muppet Family Christmas (Lexi), A Muppet Christmas Carol (Ben)
Song: I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas by Gayla Peevey (Lexi), Carol of the Bells (Ben)
Character: Zero from Nightmare Before Christmas (Lexi), Ice-Type Jesus (Ben)
Tradition: Opening one gift on Christmas Eve (Ben), Christmas morning (Lexi)
Alternative: Solstice (Lexi & Ben)

Worst:

Food: Cheap Christmas candy (Lexi), Gingerbread House kits (Ben)
Movie: Santa Claus Is Comin' to Town (Lexi), Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer (Ben)
Song: I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas by Gayla Peevey (Ben), I'm Getting Nuttin' For Christmas (Lexi)
Character: Billy Bob Thornton as Bad Santa (Lexi), Tim Allen as Santa Claus (Ben)
Tradition: Pictures with mall Santas (Lexi), Getting together with family (Ben)
Alternative: Sitting at home crying (Ben), Being sick for Christmas (Lexi)

BONUS CONTENT:

Jess' picks:

Best:

Food: Sticky buns (Christmas Day breakfast since I was a kid)
Movie: Nightmare Before Christmas
Song: Christmas Without You by Dolly Parton and Kenny Rogers
Character: The Grinch
Tradition: My mom gives everyone really elaborate stockings with little trinkets and snacks and we open them all together - it's v cute
Alt: Hanukkah (one of my aunts and my cousins are Jewish and I think it's a dope holiday)

Worst:

Food: chocolate oranges
Movie: Jingle All the Way (one of the worst movies I've ever seen, period)
Song: All I Want For Christmas Is You - I can't really describe why but something about this song just is like nails on a chalkboard to me
Character: Frosty the Snowman (just like so cloying in every interpretation)
Tradition: My family plays Monopoly on Christmas Day and it's SO LONG AND TERRIBLE
Alt: Boxing Day

SOCIALS:

Here's where you can find us!

Lexi' Hunt's website and twitter and instagram
Ben Rankel's website and instagram and where to buy his book: Amazon.ca / Comixology / Ind!go / Renegade Arts
Jess Schmidt's website, twitter and instagram
Dork Matter's website(WIP) and twitter and instagram and reddit

Having fun dorking out with Lexi & Ben? Help us get the word out by giving Dork Matters a rating and review on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your pods. We'd appreciate it!

“I'm going to tear off your skin like wrapping paper and deck the halls with your guts!” - Robot Santa

SOCIALS:

Here's where you can find us!

Lexi' Hunt's website and twitter and instagram
Ben R...

Previous Episode

Holidork Horror

You better watch out! Scare savant Laura O'Conner joins Lexi & Ben yet again to dork out about her favourite ho-ho-horror sub-genre: holiday! We've got slasher Santas, festively frightful folklore, merry mutilations, and more. You better not cry!

FURTHER DORKSCUSSION:

Our holiday-horror reviews:

Gremlins: recommend
Santa's Slay: recommend
Anna and the Apocalypse: recommend
Krampus: Laura recommends, but I think Lexi and Ben don't???
Rare Exports: recommend
Christmas Evil: recommend
Silent Night, Deadly Night: recommend if you like Christmas Evil
Nightmare Before Christmas: Not horror, but recommend as a Christmas movie

BONUS CONTENT:

You can find guest host, Laura O'Connor at @laurajoc and laurao.ca
The Flop House Podcast
Six well-known actors who totally got their dongs out in a film (NSFW) (Thanks, Lorna!)
Why are so many god-awful Christmas movies filmed in Edmonton?
How Ghost Stories Became a Christmas Tradition in Victorian England (Thanks, Jess!)

SOCIALS:

Here's where you can find us!

Lexi' Hunt's website and twitter and instagram
Ben Rankel's website and instagram and where to buy his book: Amazon.ca / Comixology / Ind!go / Renegade Arts
Jess Schmidt's website, twitter and instagram
Dork Matter's website(WIP) and twitter and instagram and reddit

Having fun dorking out with Lexi & Ben? Help us get the word out by giving Dork Matters a rating and review on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your pods. We'd appreciate it!

“Jim...

Next Episode

Dorkgeons & Dragons: An Actual Play Episode

Episode Notes

Detect magic! Lexi & Ben bring back dungeon daddy deluxe, Jason Mehmel, to talk consent and safety in tabletop RPGs and to run an actual play episode of Dungeons and Dragons with your favourite dorks. Folka, Chark & Mucho are tasked to track down some missing messengers on a magicians mountain but they just may find more than they were looking for. The adventure begins!

FURTHER DORKSCUSSION:

BONUS CONTENT: