How to: Navigate Dating After Divorce with Dr. Susan Trotter

08/02/24 • 21 min

8 Listeners

In this episode, we sit down with Dr. Susan Trotter, a renowned relationship, dating, and divorce coach, to explore the often daunting world of dating after divorce. Dr. Trotter offers valuable insights into regaining confidence and embracing the possibilities that come with a fresh start. She emphasizes the importance of self-discovery and healing before jumping into the dating scene, encouraging listeners to take time to understand their needs and desires. By focusing on personal growth and cultivating self-compassion, individuals can build a strong foundation of confidence, making them more open to meaningful connections. Dr. Trotter also shares practical advice on where to meet potential partners, from online dating platforms to community events, and stresses the importance of approaching each interaction with an open mind and heart.

Dr. Trotter highlights the benefits of viewing dating as a journey of self-exploration and opportunity rather than a task to be completed. She encourages listeners to let go of preconceived notions about what dating "should" be and instead remain open to new experiences and people. This mindset allows for a more enjoyable and authentic dating process, free from unnecessary pressure and expectations. Additionally, Dr. Trotter discusses strategies for tackling the dating process with a positive attitude, including setting realistic goals, being honest about intentions, and maintaining clear boundaries. By following these guidelines, individuals can navigate the dating landscape post-divorce with confidence, resilience, and a renewed sense of excitement about the future.

Learn more about Dr. Susan Trotter: https://www.freshstartsregistry.com/resourceguide/susan-trotter

Learn more about Dr. Susan Trotter: https://www.freshstartsregistry.com/resourceguide/susan-trotter

Previous Episode

How to: Tell Your Kids About Your Divorce with Therapist Oona Metz

8 Recommendations

In this insightful episode, we tackle one of the most challenging conversations a parent can face during a divorce: telling your children. Therapist Oona Metz joins us to share expert advice on how to approach this delicate subject with honesty and sensitivity. Oona emphasizes the importance of being both vulnerable and resilient, modeling these qualities for your children. She explains that while every parent wants to protect their kids, it is crucial to communicate honestly about family changes, providing a balance between acknowledging sadness and reassuring them that the family will navigate through this together. Oona advises that the timing of the conversation should be considered carefully, with older children being told sooner due to their ability to sense household tension, while much younger children should be informed closer to any major changes, like a parent moving out.

Oona also stresses the importance of using a calm, unified approach when delivering the news. Ideally, both parents should work together to create a set of agreed-upon statements to guide the conversation, ensuring consistency and avoiding potential conflicts in front of the children. For parents who must deliver the news alone, Oona reassures that it is better to have one thoughtful, composed parent communicate the message than two parents who disagree. The first conversation should be kept brief and focus on the decision to separate, using the term "separation" initially to introduce the concept of divorce gently. While avoiding intricate details about the reasons for the separation, it’s crucial to offer a simple explanation like “We haven’t been getting along” and reassure your children that efforts were made to resolve issues. Emphasize that while some aspects of their lives might change, your love and commitment to them remain constant. Finally, encourage your children to express their feelings and assure them that they can approach you with any questions or concerns as everyone adjusts to the new family dynamics.

Learn more about Oona Metz: https://www.freshstartsregistry.com/resourceguide/oona-metz-licsw

Next Episode

How to: Managing ADHD and Staying Organized During Divorce

5 Recommendations

In this episode of Divorce Happens, we dive into the challenges of managing ADHD and executive functioning during the transitional period of divorce. Whether you’re staying in the marital home or preparing to downsize, the process can feel overwhelming—especially for those with ADHD or neurodiverse tendencies. We explore practical strategies to tackle decision paralysis, streamline the decluttering process, and organize important documents. From leveraging tools like virtual body doubling to finding support for downsizing or tackling paperwork, this episode provides actionable tips to make the divorce transition less chaotic.

Key takeaways include the importance of breaking tasks into manageable steps, seeking support from professionals or friends, and using accountability methods like body doubling. We also discuss how organizing your space can provide mental clarity during a difficult time and why investing in help for executive functioning challenges is invaluable. This episode is a must-listen for anyone navigating divorce with ADHD or struggling to stay on top of it all.

Questions answered on this episode of Divorce Happens:

Managing ADHD During Divorce: How to Stay Organized and Simplify Your Life

How does ADHD impact the divorce process?
What is decision paralysis, and how can you overcome it during life transitions?
What strategies help with decluttering and organizing in a neurodiverse-friendly way?
How can professional organizers or virtual support provide relief during a chaotic time?