5: The Case For Parenting In Community

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02/10/22 • 30 min

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When was the last time you asked for help, or accepted it when offered? As parents it's easy to feel like we're all furiously rowing in our own boats, doesn’t it? That we're required to be independent. That having people see us when we’re struggling is a sign of weakness. But the truth is, we need those connections — and that help — from other people. Today we visit a place, and time, when a community of parents felt a shared responsibility to one another. And we talk with Mia Birdsong, author of the book How We Show Up: Reclaiming Family, Friendship, and Community, on how to build meaningful connections with other parents — and remind you why it’s necessary.

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4: I'm Giving My Kids The Childhood I Wanted. But I Struggle To Relate To It

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"I look at them and they're in a different world. I don't know how to describe it other than, 'I don't know what this is, and I don't know what comes next.'"

Esau McCaulley always knew he wanted to be a father. But he's now working through some unexpected, complicated feelings around being able to give his four children a carefree life. Esau describes how he grew up poor in Alabama and sometimes struggles with relating to his children's comfortable upbringing outside of Chicago. We talk with Esau about this tension: about how to be in your children’s world, when you feel outside of it.

Esau, a contributing opinion writer for The New York Times, first wrote about this conflict in a recent essay: "I Grew Up Poor: How Am I Supposed To Raise My Middle Class Kids?"

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6: A Lesson In Not Overthinking It

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Aubrey, a mother of three children with cognitive differences, has a habit of lying in bed at night and ruminating over the mistakes she feels that she’d made throughout the day. “Especially when you become a parent, your flaws take center stage,” she says. Although she’s been working on strategies to take better care of herself, she’s searching for a way to be kinder to herself when the chaos of her busy days feels like it’s too much. For an episode of Twenty Percent Happier that we’re sharing, Aubrey meets with Matthew Hepburn, a meditation teacher, to learn how to replace her nightly routine with a new practice: one that can help her ease up on herself when she feels like she’s falling short.

You can find more episodes of Twenty Percent Happier exclusively in the Ten Percent Happier app. https://www.tenpercent.com/twenty

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