#148 - Improve Your “Family System” by Creating “Fair Play” at Home with Eve Rodsky

Explicit content warning

05/07/20 • 61 min

May is mental health awareness month and I’m focused on shows that can help you create a better life and support your well-being.

This [COVID-19] Mother’s Day, women are still providing $10.8 trillion dollars a year of invisible, unpaid labor.

My guest this week Eve Rodsky says it’s unsustainable and she used her Harvard degree in organizational management to develop a structure for families to redistribute all it takes to make families work. Fair Play is a bestselling book and card game Eve developed over 7 years of working with families so that collaborative conversations and planning can take place to benefit every family member.

I want to share with other women and families a way forward to improve the “family system”. I’m sharing this as a beginner, someone who has read Eve Rodsky’s Fair Play and who is scared to bring it up, but I’m doing it as my Mother’s Day gift to myself.

I’ll be honest, I’m not looking forward to spending more time on my family operations, but after recording this podcast, I can see how my efforts in approaching my family with a “systems function” viewpoint will help us all learn and grow together.

After talking with Eve (and a surprise special guest) on this podcast, I’m more hopeful and confident than ever.

Have a listen and follow my updates on weekly Instagram lives Mondays at 2 p.m. ET. I’m committing to sharing updates weekly for four weeks, though I am certain it will take much more time to adapt to Fair Play at home.

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Other Reading

The coronavirus pandemic is creating a ‘double double shift’ for women. Employers must help - Op-Ed by Sharon Salzberg in Fortune
Body Kindness COVID-19 Resources
All COVID-19 themed Body Kindness podcasts

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About Eve Eve Rodsky is working to change society one marriage at a time with a new 21st century solution to an age-old problem: women shouldering the brunt of childrearing and domestic life responsibilities regardless of whether they work outside the home.

In her New York Times bestselling book Fair Play: A Game-Changing Solution for When You Have Too Much to Do (and More Life to Live), she uses her Harvard Law School training and years of organizational management experience to create a gamified life-management system to help couples rebalance all of the work it takes to run a home and allow them to reimagine their relationship, time and purpose.

Eve Rodsky received her B.A. in economics and anthropology from the University of Michigan, and her J.D. from Harvard Law School. After working in foundation management at J.P. Morgan, she founded the Philanthropy Advisory Group to advise high-net worth families and charitable foundations on best practices for harmonious operations, governance and disposition of funds. In her work with hundreds of families over a decade, she realized that her expertise in family mediation, strategy, and organizational management could be applied to a problem closer to home – a system for couples seeking balance, efficiency, and peace in their home. Rodsky was born and raised by a single mom in New York City and now lives in Los Angeles with her husband Seth and their three children.

everodsky.com | Fair Play book | Instagram | Facebook | Twitter

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Get the Body Kindness book It's available wherever books and audiobooks are sold. Read reviews on Amazon and pick up your copy today! Order signed copies and bul...

May is mental health awareness month and I’m focused on shows that can help you create a better life and support your well-being.

This [COVID-19] Mother’s Day, women are still providing $10.8 trillion dollars a year of invisible, unpaid labor.

After talking with Eve (and a surprise special guest) on this podcast, I’m more hopeful and confident than ever.

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Previous Episode

#147 - Compassion through Crisis, Stories of Hope & Gratitude for Healthcare Workers

My three guests today speak from the heart about their experiences during COVID-19 as patient advocate (Lara Loverro) and healthcare workers (Shannon Hughes and Katy Gaston). We discuss the meaning of compassion “to suffer together” and how the personal and collective traumas we’re experiencing challenge us to reframe our value, how and why we practice Body Kindness for resilience and personal growth.

Here’s a glimpse of what what we discussed:

Human kindness and how altruism and compassion give people the biological drive to help.
Gratitude to healthcare workers, Shannon Hayes a physician assistant and dietitian and Katy Gatson, a clinical registered dietitian specializing in respiratory issues.
How we can best show our gratitude and support to healthcare workers and advocate for our needs as families and communities.
The story behind the healthcare workers counter-protests throughout the U.S.

About Lara Lara Loverro is holistic health and lifestyle coach. She works with individuals to help them reconnect with food, their bodies and their lives. She is a Certified Health Coach, Certified Intuitive Eating Counselor, Certified Eating Disorder Recovery Coach and Certified Personal Trainer. Website | Instagram | Facebook: Recovery from Disordered Eating and Diet Culture with Lara

About Shannon Shannon Hughes, MMS, RDN, PA-C is a registered dietitian and physician assistant. These days she wears two professional hats in her career. One is as a pediatric physician assistant at a large children's hospital where she specializes in Infectious Diseases. But following her passion as a Registered Dietitian she founded The Lifestyle Nutrition RD, a nutrition and weight-inclusive private practice. Here she specializes in helping individuals transform their health and well-being through a mindfulness-based approach to self care including finding freedom with food and their bodies. She believes everyone, no matter what their size, deserves compassionate care and to live their life unapologetically. Website | Instagram

About Katy Katy Gaston is a registered dietitian working as a clinical RD in a long term acute care hospital in San Francisco. She also has a private practice where she sees clients virtually with a focus on intuitive eating and healing relationships with food. Website | Instagram

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Helpful links

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Get the Body Kindness book It's available wherever books and audiobooks are sold. Read reviews on Amazon and pick up your copy today! Order signed copies and bulk discounts here!

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Donate to support the show Thanks to our generous supporters! We're working toward our goal to fund the full season. Can you donate? Please visit our Go Fund Me page.

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Get started with Body Kindness Sign up to get started for free and stay up to date on the latest offerings. In addition to my free program, I’m sending out free weekly emails of support and resources for body kindness practices and resilience during the COVID-19 pandemic. These will be created directly in response to requests from Body Kindness readers and podcast listeners. Sign up as a Body Kindness Insider here to get access.<...

Next Episode

#149 - Learn & Grow Part 13 – How to Avoid a “Weight Lecture” at the Doctors with Bernie Salazar

Bernie Salazar guests with an update on how he is changing the conversation with his primary care doctors.

He’s better at boundaries and aiming to keep the focus on medical needs, but the doctors still clearly struggle to understand what it means to provide weight inclusive medical care.

He shares his labs with me again because he still wants my “input” (read: validation) that he is justified in his full commitment to practicing Body Kindness and never dieting again.

We hope you find this conversation and links below helpful. They are some of our best resources you may need for doctors visits.

(Content Note: We recorded 12/19 but delayed the launch planned for early March due to COVID-19 chaos.)

Here’s a summary of what we discussed:

I went to this new doctor visit with more confidence. I shared what I was looking for in a Dr./Patient relationship. I was honest about where I felt I was.
I am so tired of being talked at instead of having constructive conversations with medical doctors. I realize nothing will change until I speak up.
I’m changing as a person and asking for more in my visits. I am able to communicate what I need with respect. I am looking for a partnership in regards to my health rather than someone telling me what I should or shouldn’t be doing.

You’ll also get a replay of our first conversation about Bernie’s return to doctor visits after years of avoidance due to weight stigma and shame he experienced. This remains one of our most popular episodes.

Helpful Resources

Body Kindness episodes

Episode 124: Eliminating weight stigma from medical care with Jennifer Gaudiani MD, author of Sick Enough

Episode 108: How Weight Stigma Harms Culture and Excludes Higher Weight People from IVF, Hip Replacements and More, with Fiona Willer

Episode 71: Athletes at Every Size and The Plight of the “Fit Fatty” with Ragen Chastain, Guinness World Record Holder, Speaker, and Fat Activist

Body Positivity and Fat Activism (series)

Articles and Blogs

What if Physicians Stopped Weighing Patients (MD who doesn’t weigh patients interviewed)

What to Say at the Doctor’s Office with Ragen Chastain

Everything You Know About Obesity is Wrong

Training and Education

National Association for Advancement of Fat Acceptance (NAAFA) official guidelines for healthcare pros working with fat patients (brochure). Other downloadable brochures and toolkits are available, including for fitness pro, child advocacy, school curriculum and more.

Peer-reviewed curriculum designed for teaching health professionals and university students about the Health At Every Size® model.

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Check out all the previous Learn & Grow episodes here

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Get the Body Kindness book It's available wherever books and audiobooks are sold. Read reviews on Amazon and pick up your c...