Caring for Aging Parents

03/24/22 • 33 min

This week, Rayna Neises, your host, speaks with Mike and Kim Barnes. While balancing their lives as spouses and parents with their successful TV/journalism careers, they have also been caring for their aging parents. It is through these experiences that they have found a passion to help others who are on this caring journey. People want to be part of a community, and Mike and Kim are dedicating their time to helping provide that opportunity. They share the following insights:

(6:26) Each person is different, and every person’s needs are different.
(8:32) Figure out how to prioritize and not let things slip through the cracks.
(9:06) Being open with your children allows them to see what they will face as they get older and eventually care for you. In addition, it builds empathy.
(10:28) Caregiving is an additional job that you have to make room for.
(11:22) You are on an emotional roller-coaster and you cannot take everything personally.
(16:00) Check to see if in the big scheme of things, does this matter?
(20:15) Having a community to be a sounding board, to vent to, or ask questions helps.
(30:37) When discussing Power of Attorney or a will with your parents, explain that it is a gift to loved ones.
(35:01) To find interviews with experts on a variety of topics, visit Mike and Kim’s website at www.parentingagingparents.com. To join their support group, click the button on the home page and request to join their Facebook group. You can also subscribe to receive their weekly newsletter.

(6:26) Each person is different, and every person’s needs are different.
(8:32) Figure out how to prioritize and not let things slip through the cracks.
(9:06) Being open with your children allows them to see what they will face as they get older and eventually care for you. In addition, it builds empathy.
(10:28) Caregiving is an additional job that you have to make room for.
(11:22) You are on an emotional roller-coaster and you cannot take everything personally.
(16:00) Check to see if in the big scheme of things, does this matter?
(20:15) Having a community to be a sounding board, to vent to, or ask questions helps.
(30:37) When discussing Power of Attorney or a will with your parents, explain that it is a gift to loved ones.
(35:01) To find interviews with experts on a variety of topics, visit Mike and Kim’s website at www.parentingagingparents.com. To join their support group, click the button on the home page and request to join their Facebook group. You can also subscribe to receive their weekly newsletter.

Previous Episode

Tips for Care Teams and Being an Advocate

This week, Rayna Neises, your host, talks with Erin Galyean. Erin is an author, speaker, and sales trainer. From her professional experience, combined with losing her father and sister, she has become a patient advocate and wants to share her knowledge with others so they can do the same. Erin provides the following insights:

Without a caregiving team, you are robbing others of the opportunity to help, serve, love, and bring their gifts and talents to the table.
Distance caregiving is just as important.
Offer to serve in the role of VP of Communications or Meal Train Coordinator.
Do not be afraid to ask questions. Write them down and make them open-ended.
Ask if conversations with doctors can be recorded.
Everyone needs a notebook!
Create a strong morning routine that includes self-care.
Get in touch with Erin at www.badassadvocate.com and find her books, ‘Badass Advocate: Becoming the Champion Your Seriously Ill Loved One Deserves” and “My Badass Advocate Journal” on Amazon or Barnes and Noble.

Next Episode

Things to Know About Support Groups

Rayna Neises, ACC, host, discusses support groups, what might be keeping you from being a part, what to expect and various kinds of groups.

[1:48] What could be holding you back from joining a support group:
- [2:10] Feeling that you will be put on the spot and must share your story
- [3:00] Feeling uncertain regarding what you would share about your loved one and concerned that others will be critical
- [4:00] Thought that you would feel depressed or sad hearing other’s stories
- [5:19] Not knowing what to expect
[6:00] When choosing a support group, it is important to find a good fit.
[6:32] Groups should have a structure they follow.
[8:16] Why attend?
- [9:16] Reduce isolation
- [10:00] Relieve stress
- [10:35] Gain education
- [11:26] Become more balanced
- [14:15] Friendships
[15:09] Different kinds of groups
- Peer-Peer or Mutual
- Association Groups
- In-Person
- Online
- Facebook
[16:17] Try out the group to be sure it is a good fit. If it is not, do not be afraid to leave it and try a different one.
[16:43] Visit aseasonofcaring.com and find out more about Rayna’s free monthly support group or Nourish for Caregiver's faith-based weekly support group.
[17:17] In June, join her book study via her Facebook group to find support through her book, No Regrets: Hope for Your Caregiving Season.

A Season of Caring Podcast - Caring for Aging Parents

Transcript

Mike Barnes00:00:02.500

Having that community, I know it helps. I know that there are people out there who don't have that. So if we can provide that, if we can give you a sounding board, whether it's someplace to vent or someplace to ask questions, or just someplace to, to look around, to try and get some ideas, that's gonna help you a little bit mm-hmm then. Oh my gosh. That's a huge win for anyone.

Rayna Neises00:00:20.913

That is my