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Your ADHD Besties - 27. "My ADHD makes me feel so broken and I can't stop negative thinking!" 😭

27. "My ADHD makes me feel so broken and I can't stop negative thinking!" 😭

10/10/24 • 52 min

1 Listener

Your ADHD Besties

Hi ADHD besties! This is our LAST episode of SEASON 1! After this ep, we are taking a teeny tiny break and will be back with our usual episode the Thursday after next... PLUS we have some very exciting news! 👀
This week we're overstimulated by kids parties and raising boys (boy parents will agree that it's a never ending bucks party!) 🙃
Dilemma:
A gorgeous neurotypical listener asks how he can support his ADHD girlfriend, especially with her negative self talk and internalised ableism. 👩‍❤️‍👨
We discuss:
- How cycles of negative self talk are conditioned in childhood and can become increasingly savage and disollusioning.
- How a partner/friend can help their negative partner by reflecting their thoughts back to them, and helping them get some perspective.
- Grace shares the biggest shifts in her journey with negative self talk and why taking ownership helped hugely.
- Creating space between our thoughts and ourselves and recognising unconscious thought patterns.
- The neurobiology of the brain and why we get stuck in negative thought patterns.
- We look at the concept of 'clickbait thoughts' and question whether thoughts are helpful, instead of whether they're true.
RECS:
- Grace has another questionable rec that Tara is convinced that she came up with 5 minutes prior to recording
- Tara recommends the book 'The Happiness Trap' by Russ Harris
Ireggy Seggy:
This week we're playing 'Good words, Bad words': is it an auditory stim or does it make you feel like peeling your ears off? 🫣
Don't RSD loves!
Tara & Grace xx

----------------------------
🦋 WANT MORE ADHD BESTIES? JOIN OUR PATRE0N COMMUNITY for subscriber-only episodes every week, bestie chat groups, live Q&As, downloadables and so much more!
Find us on socials (so it's not just our husbands commenting 👨‍🦲👨‍🦱)
🌈 IG @adhdbestiespodcast
🌈 TikTok @adhdbestiespodcast
❗️ SUBMIT your Divergent Dilemma for us to read on the podcast: https://adhdbesties.com/dilemmas/ (you can stay anon if you like!)
Music by Vocalista
Keywords: ADHD women’s podcast, ADHD for women, ADHD in women, ADHD support for women, ADHD empowerment, ADHD tips for women, ADHD self-care, ADHD strategies for women, neurodivergent women’s experiences, ADHD mental health for women, ADHD personal stories, ADHD late diagnosis, ADHD focus tips, ADHD executive functioning, ADHD and RSD (Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria), ADHD coping strategies, ADHD and motherhood, ADHD treatment for women, women’s ADHD podcast, ADHD medication for women, ADHD wellness for women, ADHD community for women, women with ADHD support, ADHD resources for women, ADHD and anxiety in women, ADHD podcast for neurodivergent women.

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Hi ADHD besties! This is our LAST episode of SEASON 1! After this ep, we are taking a teeny tiny break and will be back with our usual episode the Thursday after next... PLUS we have some very exciting news! 👀
This week we're overstimulated by kids parties and raising boys (boy parents will agree that it's a never ending bucks party!) 🙃
Dilemma:
A gorgeous neurotypical listener asks how he can support his ADHD girlfriend, especially with her negative self talk and internalised ableism. 👩‍❤️‍👨
We discuss:
- How cycles of negative self talk are conditioned in childhood and can become increasingly savage and disollusioning.
- How a partner/friend can help their negative partner by reflecting their thoughts back to them, and helping them get some perspective.
- Grace shares the biggest shifts in her journey with negative self talk and why taking ownership helped hugely.
- Creating space between our thoughts and ourselves and recognising unconscious thought patterns.
- The neurobiology of the brain and why we get stuck in negative thought patterns.
- We look at the concept of 'clickbait thoughts' and question whether thoughts are helpful, instead of whether they're true.
RECS:
- Grace has another questionable rec that Tara is convinced that she came up with 5 minutes prior to recording
- Tara recommends the book 'The Happiness Trap' by Russ Harris
Ireggy Seggy:
This week we're playing 'Good words, Bad words': is it an auditory stim or does it make you feel like peeling your ears off? 🫣
Don't RSD loves!
Tara & Grace xx

----------------------------
🦋 WANT MORE ADHD BESTIES? JOIN OUR PATRE0N COMMUNITY for subscriber-only episodes every week, bestie chat groups, live Q&As, downloadables and so much more!
Find us on socials (so it's not just our husbands commenting 👨‍🦲👨‍🦱)
🌈 IG @adhdbestiespodcast
🌈 TikTok @adhdbestiespodcast
❗️ SUBMIT your Divergent Dilemma for us to read on the podcast: https://adhdbesties.com/dilemmas/ (you can stay anon if you like!)
Music by Vocalista
Keywords: ADHD women’s podcast, ADHD for women, ADHD in women, ADHD support for women, ADHD empowerment, ADHD tips for women, ADHD self-care, ADHD strategies for women, neurodivergent women’s experiences, ADHD mental health for women, ADHD personal stories, ADHD late diagnosis, ADHD focus tips, ADHD executive functioning, ADHD and RSD (Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria), ADHD coping strategies, ADHD and motherhood, ADHD treatment for women, women’s ADHD podcast, ADHD medication for women, ADHD wellness for women, ADHD community for women, women with ADHD support, ADHD resources for women, ADHD and anxiety in women, ADHD podcast for neurodivergent women.

Previous Episode

undefined - 26. "I constantly interrupt people and I feel terrible about myself"

26. "I constantly interrupt people and I feel terrible about myself"

Oh hiiii, ADHD Bestie babes! 🌟
This week, Grace (almost) becomes the neighborhood hero by saving the day from controlled burn-offs, while Tara triumphs over PMDD for the first time since she was 13.
Dilemma: Our gorgeous Kiwi listener is feeling serious RSD when it comes to interrupting people during conversations. We discuss why ADHDers do this and how to see this trait from different perspectives, including how to own it and advocate for your ADHD brain as a way to open up conversations and express empathy for someone.
Ireggy Seggy: 🐷 PIG in the middle (A.K.A The positive interrupting game). This week we play a torturous game where one person must speak slo-o-o-wly and the other must gleefully interrupt them. It's as unhinged as it sounds and Tara forgets how to geography. 🫠 🌎
REC LINKS:
Tara's Rec: The Middleditch and Schwartz completely improvised comedy specials on Netflix. Improv that is equal parts hilarious and genius!
Grace's Rec: @ktscanvases - A must-follow Instagram/art account that’s playful, sardonic, and visually stunning.
JOIN OUR ADHD BESTIES INSTAGRAM CHAT HERE

As always, we will be back in your beautiful little ND ears next THURSDAY!
Until then, DO NOT RSD (we will be so mad!!)
Ta and G ❤️‍🔥

----------------------------
🦋 WANT MORE ADHD BESTIES? JOIN OUR PATRE0N COMMUNITY for subscriber-only episodes every week, bestie chat groups, live Q&As, downloadables and so much more!
Find us on socials (so it's not just our husbands commenting 👨‍🦲👨‍🦱)
🌈 IG @adhdbestiespodcast
🌈 TikTok @adhdbestiespodcast
❗️ SUBMIT your Divergent Dilemma for us to read on the podcast: https://adhdbesties.com/dilemmas/ (you can stay anon if you like!)
Music by Vocalista
Keywords: ADHD women’s podcast, ADHD for women, ADHD in women, ADHD support for women, ADHD empowerment, ADHD tips for women, ADHD self-care, ADHD strategies for women, neurodivergent women’s experiences, ADHD mental health for women, ADHD personal stories, ADHD late diagnosis, ADHD focus tips, ADHD executive functioning, ADHD and RSD (Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria), ADHD coping strategies, ADHD and motherhood, ADHD treatment for women, women’s ADHD podcast, ADHD medication for women, ADHD wellness for women, ADHD community for women, women with ADHD support, ADHD resources for women, ADHD and anxiety in women, ADHD podcast for neurodivergent women.

Next Episode

undefined - 28. HOW TO: fall in love with your STIMS, manage sensory clashes & reframe ADHD inconsistency

28. HOW TO: fall in love with your STIMS, manage sensory clashes & reframe ADHD inconsistency

ADHD BABESSSS! We’re back for Season 2!

In today’s episode Tara is joining us from East Java 🌺, while poor Grace is joining us from germ-ville 🤧.

Grace makes a retraction and apology about her pronunciation of the word Appalachian 🏔️ and promises not to RSD (see: she will RSD about it forever).

Dilemma 1: "How do I find a hobby I like and actually stick with it?"

We discuss letting go of the idea of having to ‘achieve’ hobbies and see them through to completion and that hobbies are often for regulation itself, rather than achieving an end point. Striving for consistency and completion when your brain is interest-driven and divergent can often lead to us feeling Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) and/or feeling negative or resentful towards the hobby.

Dilemma 2: "My son and I have clashing sensory issues 😫 - HELP!!"

We discuss sensory profiles, occupational therapy, and give some suggestions on how to make sure both of your sensory needs are met. We explore sensory avoiding and sensory seeking types, and the challenge of integrating stimuli.

Ireggy Seggy: This week we asked YOU guys what burning questions you had for us. We mostly ponder extremely personal and profound questions like ‘if you were a dinosaur, what kind would you be?’ and ‘what is the best ice-cream flavour?’, in which Grace learns some things about Tara that she can’t unsee... but we also cover some more serious questions like how to speak to family and friends about your diagnosis.

REC LINKS:

Grace recommends: Using your sick leave to smoke through full seasons of TV series, particularly season 3 of the Netflix series Heartstopper, which she feels is not only queer-affirming, but also neuro-affirming and healing for Boomers, Gen-Xers and Millennials to watch as it is so different to our lived experiences growing up 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️.
Tara recommends: Hair shampoo brush things (like this) they feel amazing, but also help to keep hair cleaner for longer, and may help with hair growth 🪮💁‍♀️

We will be back in your insanely gorgeous ears next THURSDAYYY!

and until then DON’T RSD (we're watching

----------------------------
🦋 WANT MORE ADHD BESTIES? JOIN OUR PATRE0N COMMUNITY for subscriber-only episodes every week, bestie chat groups, live Q&As, downloadables and so much more!
Find us on socials (so it's not just our husbands commenting 👨‍🦲👨‍🦱)
🌈 IG @adhdbestiespodcast
🌈 TikTok @adhdbestiespodcast
❗️ SUBMIT your Divergent Dilemma for us to read on the podcast: https://adhdbesties.com/dilemmas/ (you can stay anon if you like!)
Music by Vocalista
Keywords: ADHD women’s podcast, ADHD for women, ADHD in women, ADHD support for women, ADHD empowerment, ADHD tips for women, ADHD self-care, ADHD strategies for women, neurodivergent women’s experiences, ADHD mental health for women, ADHD personal stories, ADHD late diagnosis, ADHD focus tips, ADHD executive functioning, ADHD and RSD (Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria), ADHD coping strategies, ADHD and motherhood, ADHD treatment for women, women’s ADHD podcast, ADHD medication for women, ADHD wellness for women, ADHD community for women, women with ADHD support, ADHD resources for women, ADHD and anxiety in women, ADHD podcast for neurodivergent women.

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