Grief and Loss: Navigating the Holiday Blues with Lynette Jackson | EP. 40

12/05/22 • 53 min

Have you ever tried to cover your emptiness on the inside? How can we indeed cope with grief and loss during the holidays?

The holidays bring joy for many, but they can be challenging for those impacted by mental illness, grief, and loss. We can never control many things in this world, such as life, death, and how people will treat us. And with those things, we can all feel the pain of every single thing that is giving us hurtful memories. And some of us tend to suppress our emotions and be hard on ourselves. We often refuse to give ourselves permission to grieve, cry, and experience the necessary process of grieving to heal.

Thus, we must learn to properly take care of our mental health, especially during moments such as holidays – gatherings where we are prone to distressing memories of heartaches from the people we love. Let us never compromise our worth and be mindful of how we practice self-compassion and self-love.

So, in this episode, we seek to help people find peace to permit themselves to feel a certain way to heal from those things hurting them. And also to encourage people to speak out loud in the marketplace. Join us as we discover other learnings about mental health and how we can help eradicate the stigma behind it.

Today, we're joined by Lynette Jackson, a Marketing Consultant, Owner of Roar Media Group, Mental Health Advocate, and founder and CEO of Roar Media Group. This multi-marketing company has worked with multi-million-dollar churches, small businesses, and grassroots ministries. Lynette has also founded Vision Publishing Group, a publishing company that develops the visions of new authors. She is the author of "Hollow... when everything that means anything is taken away" and is a member of the Speaks 2 Inspire speaker's team.

Lynette's book, Hollow, is an eye-opening, heartfelt book sharing the personal accounts of Lynette, a woman who has battled depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and opioid and alcohol addiction to cope with losing everything that meant anything to her.

"The verbal was worse than the physical because it seemed like the physical you could remember getting hit and falling on the ground, but it healed. However, it was the words from the verbal abuse that seemed to stay and linger longer." – Lynette Jackson

Show Highlights:

(00:00:00) Episode disclaimer, highlight, and introduction

(00:01:37) Welcoming today's guest, Lynette Jackson

(00:03:09) Mental health advocate: Who is Lynette Jackson?

(00:05:32) Strong people also struggle.

(00:06:17) How Lynette cope with losing the things that were most important to her

(00:08:46) The chocolate easter bunny: Pretty but empty

(00:10:39) Lynette struggles to look good but feels empty

(00:12:30) Verbal abuse was worse than the physical

(00:14:18) Figure out what's making you empty

(00:15:40) Being filled with the love of God

(00:17:33) Understanding the grief process: The Five stages of grief

(00:22:01) No one can rush you to the grieving process: We can't minimize grief

(00:26:08) Everyone grieves in their way

(00:28:10) How do we find a source of support?

(00:30:13) Know that you're not alone

(00:31:11) permit yourself to get help

(00:33:24) The importance of self-compassion

(00:34:05) The feelings wheel: There were feeling outside being happy and mad

(00:35:35) Never let other people tell you what you do and don't feel

(00:37:05) Suicide Attempt: An option to end the pain

(00:37:45) If you need that support for your mental health, reach out to the National Suicide

Prevention Lifeline by calling 9-8-8 now. For local and national resources, go to

http://www.speaks2inspire.com/resources. Join the Unlearn The Lies About Mental Health

Facebook group: https://bit.ly/UTLcommunity.

(00:38:20) The worst thing we can do is discount someone's feelings.

(00:39:47) Don't just listen: Listen to understand.

(00:41:00) Three Processes of helping people: Feel, Felt, and Found

(00:42:55) Set realistic expectations for yourself.

(00:44:03) Remember all the beautiful memories you have with a long gone loved one.

(00:46:17) Take care of yourself and honor what you need to heal

(00:47:53) What is mental health for Lynette?

(00:49:32) Hollow: When Everything That Means Anything Is Taken Away

(00:51:45) Connect with Lynette Jackson

Key Takeaways:

"Sometimes it's difficult to see that, those of us who are strong also struggle." – Abraham Sculley

"I felt people, friends, family, life lost interest in m...

Have you ever tried to cover your emptiness on the inside? How can we indeed cope with grief and loss during the holidays?

Show Highlights:

(00:00:00) Episode disclaimer, highlight, and introduction

(00:01:37) Welcoming today's guest, Lynette Jackson

(00:03:09) Mental health advocate: Who is Lynette Jackson?

(00:05:32) Strong people also struggle.

(00:06:17) How Lynette cope with losing the things that were most important to her

(00:08:46) The chocolate easter bunny: Pretty but empty

(00:10:39) Lynette struggles to look good but feels empty

(00:12:30) Verbal abuse was worse than the physical

(00:14:18) Figure out what's making you empty

(00:15:40) Being filled with the love of God

(00:17:33) Understanding the grief process: The Five stages of grief

(00:22:01) No one can rush you to the grieving process: We can't minimize grief

(00:26:08) Everyone grieves in their way

(00:28:10) How do we find a source of support?

(00:30:13) Know that you're not alone

(00:31:11) permit yourself to get help

(00:33:24) The importance of self-compassion

(00:34:05) The feelings wheel: There were feeling outside being happy and mad

(00:35:35) Never let other people tell you what you do and don't feel

(00:37:05) Suicide Attempt: An option to end the pain

(00:37:45) If you need that support for your mental health, reach out to the National Suicide

Prevention Lifeline by calling 9-8-8 now. For local and national resources, go to

http://www.speaks2inspire.com/resources. Join the Unlearn The Lies About Mental Health

Facebook group: https://bit.ly/UTLcommunity.

(00:38:20) The worst thing we can do is discount someone's feelings.

(00:39:47) Don't just listen: Listen to understand.

(00:41:00) Three Processes of helping people: Feel, Felt, and Found

(00:42:55) Set realistic expectations for yourself.

(00:44:03) Remember all the beautiful memories you have with a long gone loved one.

(00:46:17) Take care of yourself and honor what you need to heal

(00:47:53) What is mental health for Lynette?

(00:49:32) Hollow: When Everything That Means Anything Is Taken Away

(00:51:45) Connect with Lynette Jackson

Key Takeaways:

"Sometimes it's difficult to see that, those of us who are strong also struggle." – Abraham Sculley

"I felt people, friends, family, life lost interest in m...

Previous Episode

Normalize Mental Health Conversations | EP. 39

Anxiety has been the number one mental health concern that is widely encountered nowadays. It has many different symptoms, ranging from hyperarousal to behavioral issues, which indicates a significant global health burden. However, when in this state, it can sometimes be challenging to speak up freely. There are misconceptions about mental health that we can visibly see around us.

People often view mental health issues as nothing more than temporary hormonal swings, and a person acts out in an effort to get attention. Thus, we must realize that mental health is not a destination but a process. It's about how you drive, not where you're going.

So, in this episode, we aim to help people realize the value of normalizing the conversation about mental health and raising awareness on how to be someone capable of supporting another. Join us as we learn about the importance of self-care, validation statements, and empowering conversations in a person's mental health.

Today, we're joined by Francesca Reicherter, the Founder and President of Inspiring My Generation, a 501(c)3 supporting mental health awareness and suicide prevention. Inspired by her mental health journey, Francesca works to make resources and information accessible. In 2021, Francesca published "You Are Not Alone: The Workbook" as a guide to help the reader build a coping toolbox. In 2022, Francesca published "I AM," an interactive workbook to help readers make the tools needed to advocate for their mental health.

Dedicated to ending the stigma, Francesca hosts Normalize the Conversation, a podcast series amplifying the voices of mental health professionals, advocates, and anyone interested in sharing their stories. Francesca's mission is to make preventative resources available, eliminate barriers, and normalize the conversation so that no one else has to lose themselves or someone else to suicide.

Show Highlights:

(00:00:00) Episode disclaimer, highlight, and introduction

(00:02:44) "Mental health is not a destination, but a process. It's about how you drive, not where you're going.": What does it mean for me?

(00:03:09) Welcoming today's guest, Francesca Reicherter

(00:05:41) How did Francesca rise beyond being exposed to painful circumstances to becoming a dependable mental health advocate?

(00:10:45) Recognizing anxiety: The fear of not being good enough

(00:12:37) The importance of having a support system

(00:13:53) Nobody is ready to lose the person they care about the most.

(00:17:50) The inability to cope with emotional pains: How did Fran attempt suicide on Christmas eve?

(00:21:30) Do not ignore your mental health: Being unable to manage your discomfort is not a good position to be able to take care of others.

(00:24:37) Being weak is part of the human experience: Strong people still encounter weakening situations.

(00:26:13) Being quiet versus reaching out: What do you think was one of the most significant barriers to having self-awareness?

(00:29:21) Internal and external self-care: How can we prioritize our mental health nowadays?

(00:32:31) The power of setting healthy boundaries

(00:34:52) The goal of creating coping tool boxes workbooks: How does it help people to develop their mental health routine?

(00:39:28) How do we bridge the communication gap?

(00:41:13) The labels people give us don't define us.

(00:44:30) What does mental health mean to Francesca?

(00:45:26) Sign up and be part of the upcoming workshops: Introduction to Youth Advocacy & Introduction to mentoring.

(00:49:03) Where to find Francesca to connect and learn from her

(00:49:45) If you need that support for your mental health, reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline by calling 9-8-8 now. For local and national resources, go to http://www.speaks2inspire.com/resources. Join the Unlearn The Lies About Mental Health Facebook group: https://bit.ly/UTLcommunity.

Key Takeaways:

"I think the more we normalize the conversation about mental health, the more we're able to take care of our mental health to put ourselves in the best position possible so that we can be overall healthy and we're taking care of our well-being." - Abraham Sculley

"I wanted to talk about my feelings, but I was acting like a baby to other people. So, all those praises they throw were to invalidate instead of giving you space to feel." – Francesca Reicherter

"I put myself in a situation I wasn't ready to be in. I didn't know how to take care of myself, which was not a good position to be able to take care of others. I learned now how important it is to put that mask on yourself first, or at least be putting it on yourself as you're trying to put it on someone else, and not just comp...

Next Episode

Planting Seeds: Mental Health in Schools l EP. 41

How can we be more effective at enhancing and becoming more conscious of our mental health? How can we come together to ensure everyone has the best mental health possible, regardless of how it manifests itself?

According to the World Health Organization, Half of all mental health conditions start by the age of 14. Mental health issues such as anxiety, depression, and substance abuse are common among young people. Advocating for young people's mental health is crucial since it can significantly impact their well-being, academic and social functioning, and long-term outcomes.

Mental health is an essential aspect of overall health and well-being, and individuals need access to resources and support to help them manage their mental health. However, mental health education is not always a formal part of traditional education. Thus, educational institutions and organizations must recognize the importance of mental health education and take steps to integrate it into their curriculums.

In this episode, we want to help individuals recognize the significance of reinforcing discussions about a particular issue most people are uncomfortable with mental health. And also to spread awareness on how to be compassionate, empathetic, and kind to people experiencing mental health challenges. Join us as we learn about the importance of mental health education in improving the lives of teenage students' lives, assisting teachers in incorporating discussions about mental health into their classes, and providing resources and support for students struggling with mental health issues.

Today, we're joined by Seth Nilsen, the student organization "Mental Health Mankato" founder in college who founded CultureChange after Mental Health Mankato was awarded "Student Organization of the Year" in 2020 by Minnesota State University, Mankato.

CultureChange began by advising university student leaders on how to successfully advocate for legislative advancements and sending volunteer teachers to teach their mental health curriculum (K–12). The Mankato Clinic Foundation sponsored their curriculum.

Seth has developed the curriculum to align with the National Health Education Standards and has designed the lessons to be activity-based. Through CultureChange, he has also been able to advise university mental health policy. Thus, CultureChange has formally passed and implemented a bill at Minnesota State University-Mankato and is working with multiple other schools to adopt similar bills.

"The best thing about teaching mental health is that it teaches kids compassion and empathy. Nothing is more important than learning the importance of being kind at a young age. And there's no better way to learn how to be kind than to practice supporting people and understanding them who may be facing challenges that you are not facing." Seth Nilsen

Show Highlights:

(00:00:00) Episode disclaimer, highlight, and introduction

(00:02:05) Half of all mental health illnesses appear before age 14.

(00:03:29) Welcoming today's guest, Seth Nilsen

(00:04:30) A mental health advocate: Who is Seth Nilsen?

(00:06:08) What makes Seth passionate about being a mental health advocate?

(00:08:04) Being motivated by the inspiring journeys of people overcoming their mental health battles

(00:09:15) Mental health hasn't been a part of traditional education.

(00:10:43) How can we help and encourage students dealing with mental health challenges?

(00:13:21) A careful teaching method: destigmatizing mental health through mindful conversations.

(00:15:14) Self-awareness: Empowering students with self-awareness about mental health

(00:16:02) Why is teaching mental health education in the K–12 curriculum crucial?

(00:17:15) The Individual Stress Response Tracking Chart

(00:18:34) You don't have to be an expert to be able to help.

(00:21:15) Learning the importance of kindness through mental health education

(00:23:14) This episode is powered by Speaks to Inspire, the mental health solution for young adults suffering in silence. Speaks 2 Inspire works with colleges and universities to create and implement safe, comprehensive programs for campuses nationwide.

(00:24:00) The School Mental Health Framework: What does it entail?

(00:27:15) What does mental health mean to Seth Nilsen?

(00:28:00) Find ways to live your happiest life.

(00:29:59) CultureChange: School Mental Health Framework (Curriculum, Screening Tool Recommendations, Policy Recommendations)

(00:32:16) Where to find Seth to connect and learn from him?

(00:34:02) We can end the mental health crisis through proper education.

(00:35:12) What is dual programming?

(00:37:37) If you need that support for your mental health, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline by calling 9-8-8 now. For local and nati...