Breaking the Mold

What do you want in life and what does it take to get there? This is a question we should all ask ourselves on a consistent basis. A concept I will repeatedly visit is the space between now and where we want to be. If you have not begun to fill that space with the things you need to do to get to where you want to go, then you don't want it bad enough, plain and simple. You may talk the talk but can you walk the walk. I often hear about big dreams but never hear about plans to achieve them. Some people will go as far as to blame the world if success does not magically fall into their lap. I feel as if we live in an age of entitlement and the current generation looks at the world as if it owes them something. Some people have the big dreams but never take initiative to chase them. Then they turn around and blame their circumstances, or their luck, or their lack of resources. After the book "The Secret" went big, it left a whole population of people believing they can think their way into success. I am the first person to believe in positive thinking and manifesting your dreams, but a dream can not manifest if you don't put in the work. You can dream all you want, but sitting on the couch will not make your dreams come true. You have to break the mold. Break the mold of who you are to become the person you want to be.

We all must understand that we are the only ones responsible for the outcomes of our lives. You have to take ownership of who you become. Life does not simply happen to people. I know all to well because I once blamed the whole world for not being where I wanted to be. My late teens to early twenties were a rough time in my life, but it was only rough because I made it that way for myself. I had frequent run-ins with the law, several of which landed me in jail at a young age. I was a very smart young man with a great family but for some reason I went the complete wrong route with my life. I developed destructive behaviors and habits, probably none more toxic than intense anger. It was destructive not only to those around me but to myself. I was angry because life wasn't fair, angry because I wasn't where I wanted to be and the world was responsible. I felt I was never given a legitimate chance to succeed. The truth was I had been blessed with a sharp mind, a loving family and had all the opportunity in the world to succeed. I was simply throwing it away.

I began to feel like an outcast in my family. I wasn't a good brother or son. My family was the most important thing in my life and I loved them so much but I kept pushing them further and further away with my destructive behaviors and actions. One day things changed. I realized it was me. It was me who was pushing them away. I was responsible for where I was in life. It wasn't the world, it wasn't a lack of resources, it was me. Accepting that truth was painful but it is what I needed to wake up. We must always remember that it is our actions which produce our future, and we have complete control of them.

I began to change very quickly. Why? Because subconsciously I linked my behavior to losing my family and to not living my dreams. Unbeknownst to me I began using a powerful tool to change myself. That tool was Neuro Associative Conditioning or NAC.

NAC was devised by none other than Tony Robbins. All humans essentially have two driving forces behind any of our actions. They are simply the drive to avoid pain, or the drive to seek pleasure. The drive to avoid pain is the stronger of the two and is the key to changing our behaviors. When we consciously link our limiting behaviors to pain, we will find it much easier to change any pattern or behavior that we once struggled with.

What makes a life-long smoker quit the habit after they have tried so many times and failed? What drives someone to stop procrastinating and start moving? When we link pain to the actions that limit us, we will always be more apt to make permanent changes in our lives. If you want to lose weight, change your relationships, break your old habits, whatever it is. I suggest that you do two things. The first is to look in the mirror and realize that the answer lies inside of you. You are only where you are because of the choices and actions that you make in life. The second step is to begin to associate the patterns and behaviors holding you back in life to intense pain, only then will you truly avoid them and begin to make lasting change. I feel so strongly about this because it changed my life. I know it works because I have tried it at a time when my life was covered in darkness. At the time I didn't know about NAC, I didn't know about Tony Robbins did not mindfully make an attempt at rewiring my behaviors. It just happened. The one thing I knew is that I needed to change.

I am now in a great place in my life. I am successful, I am close with my family, and I am living out my dreams. I use NAC now to shape my life, it has lite...