Struggling Doesn't Mean You're Failing - Keep Going

04/18/22 • 31 min

RealPositiveGirl - Weekly Encouragement & Mental Health

Struggling isn't failing because by not giving up on your struggle & not allowing it to hold you captive you are actually succeeding. I have 4 reasons why struggling isn't failing.
Show Notes:
Do you ever feel like you aren’t succeeding the same way others are? Or maybe you’ve been going through so much crap & problems lately that it feels like all you’re doing is struggling. When we are feeling like we aren’t succeeding and others are getting further ahead in life it can cause us to question how well we are doing. That darn comparison obsession.

When you’re going through struggles it can feel like you’re failing. It can feel like you’re never given enough time to recover. It can feel like you’re the only one going through this experience, too. Struggles can feel so isolating. You’re dealing with feeling overwhelmed, trying to come up with the best problem-solving solution & keep everything else in your life together. It’s just a lot.

Meanwhile, people are out here telling you that the other side of your struggle is the place you want to be and to keep going. Which sounds nice, but isn’t always the most helpful thing you can hear in these moments. To be honest, there really isn’t too much that can be said while you are knee-deep in the struggle that will make it magically better. Motivational phrases here and there, genuine people coming to the rescue when you need support and having the ability to take mental and physical breaks can be great helps, but it’s still just all up to you.

And I do need to mention that failing is not a terrible thing. It can feel terrible in the moment because what you wanted to happen didn’t happen and this means more time spent and effort put out in the long run, which isn’t fun. But failing isn’t the end of the world because there is so much you learn while failing. There is so much opportunity for growth and change and shifting your perspective. And if you continue to avoid failure in your life, you’ll never discover new things about who you are and what you are capable of doing because you aren’t pushing yourself beyond your perceived means. It’s worth it if you’re willing to fall down a bit.

Today I want to talk to you about how going through struggles doesn’t mean you’re failing. It can certainly feel like you’re failing because what you’re going through isn’t getting any better and sometimes more problems end up piling on top of what you’re already dealing with and again, it’s just too much.

But you’re not failing. If anything, you’re succeeding to the most because you’ve decided that not giving up isn’t an option. You’ve decided that you need to keep going and not let your struggles control you and dictate your future. But persevering and making that mental shift from “this is too hard” to “this isn’t too hard for me to get through,” is the key.

Here are 4 reasons why struggling isn’t failing:

You’re Actually Trying
It’s Just Taking Longer for Your Results
Success Doesn’t Come Without Setbacks (luck is short-lived)
You’re Growing Through this Struggle

Thank you again for listening & I hope this episode was helpful.

Come visit me on my Instagram page @sabrinajoyperozzo.

Have any questions, comments or feedback? Send me an email at [email protected] or check out my website, www.sabrinajoy.com where y

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Here are 4 reasons why struggling isn’t failing:

You’re Actually Trying
It’s Just Taking Longer for Your Results
Success Doesn’t Come Without Setbacks (luck is short-lived)
You’re Growing Through this Struggle

Thank you again for listening & I hope this episode was helpful.

Come visit me on my Instagram page @sabrinajoyperozzo.

Have any questions, comments or feedback? Send me an email at [email protected] or check out my website, www.sabrinajoy.com where y

Support the show

Previous Episode

How to Take Breaks & End Toxic Friendships & Relationships

Not all relationships last forever. Some for a season, fewer for a lifetime.
Sometimes you have to take a break to come back stronger or just end it for your better health.
Show Notes:
I didn’t really understand until I was a young adult in college that relationships, platonic or romantic, didn’t have to last forever. Even family ones.

Honestly, this was really good for me to discover because while I was in college, I needed to put some space between my father & me. There are times in our lives when we can just become overwhelmed with the differences of opinions, hurt feelings, miscommunications, all the things. And rather than continue to verbally abuse each other or sometimes physically (hopefully not), taking a break can be a better option.

However, I do want to mention that there might be times when you have already tried to take breaks from one another, maybe several times, but nothing changes. This might mean that you need to end the relationship. Sometimes you're no longer willing to pay the cost to be in that relationship.

Many relationships have an expiration date. Some are only meant to last for a season & others can last a lifetime. Relationships take work from both sides. There will not be perfect balance all the time or even often, but it needs to go back & forth between both people. When that doesn’t happen, it can become too much and you have to make the choice to endure or move forward.

Here are some red flags for when it might be better for you to end a relationship:

They betray your trust
They are more often negative & have a victim mentality
There seems to be drama with & around them too often
They don’t seem to listen to you or care when you need support
They don’t respect your boundaries

Sometimes trauma or abuse that happens in a relationship causes you to instill a break or an ending. These will be moments where you need to decide what is best for you & what needs to happen for you to endure as little pain as possible & no abuse. My suggestion to you is that if you are being abused, that should be an immediate end of the relationship. Trauma is tougher because being around those that were present during your trauma experience can be triggering for you. Which could lead to you taking a break from those relationships or even having to end those if it’s just too much hurt.

Today I want to share with you some tips on How to Take a Break or End Friendships & Relationships:

Really Think Through the Reasons Why You Want to Take a Break or End the Relationship.
Don’t Ghost Them, Have the Conversation Out of Respect.
Don’t Come to Someone in Anger or Reflect Their Anger in the Moment.
Don’t Play the Blame Game & Only Speak How YOU Feel.
Share Your Boundaries With Them to Know for the Future.
Make Plans to See Each Other in the Future.
Forgive Them.

Thank you again for listening & I hope this episode was helpful.

Come visit me on my Instagram page @sabrinajoyperozzo.

Have any questions, comments or feedback? Send me an email at [email protected] or check out my website, www.sabrinajoy.com where you can listen to all my episodes, send me messages & sign up for my bi-weekly newsletter

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Next Episode

It's Okay to Have Bad Days - Struggling & Surviving

Why are we all trying to hide the fact that we have bad days? Everyone experiences bad days & there shouldn't be any shame in that. Let's stop shaming others for not having their whole lives be perfect all the time. I have 4 big reasons why having a bad day is totally acceptable.
Show Notes:

When you have a bad day, it doesn’t matter what happened or who was involved, it just matters that you felt like it was not a good day. And that’s important because we need to keep an eye on how many days we feel we are struggling vs how many are going well or good enough. I’m fine if a majority of my days were good enough because I made it through without slowly slipping down into a spiral of mental chaos.

But not allowing yourself to slip down into that mental chaos, that pit of despair, anything adjacent to victim mentality is the best thing you can do. Because it’s really easy to let it happen. You can easily allow whatever bad things happened that day take over all the space in your mind & not allow you to still see the good things that happened. Ask yourself how much better your day would be if you decided to make highlighting the good things in your day (even if it’s fewer than the bad things) as important as it is to talk a lot about the bad things.

The hard & tough things stand out to us & seem more fun to share than the good things, the positive things. Having a captive audience for all the good things that happened to you today feels less likely. Another reason it’s easier to share the negatives instead of the positives is that it allows you to relate with others easier. Whereas, sharing the positives & everything going well for you can feel like bragging, self-absorbed or non-inclusive to others because they may not be having the same experiences in their life.

Just because you have a bad day doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. Or bad at what you do. It just means that things didn’t work out. And that’s ok because not everything is going to work out. I would even go so far to say that not everything is supposed to work out. We make plans & think we thought it all the way through, but we often miss things or it just wasn’t meant to be, so it doesn’t work out. But whether you come to that conclusion or not, it’s still ok to have bad days.

Let me share with you 4 reasons why it’s acceptable to have bad days:

Bad Days Give You a Chance to Check-In With Yourself (honor your feelings, figure out if something triggered you, figure out what & why something bothered you, learn to sit with your negative emotions)
You Appreciate Your Good Moments More (once you start becoming more self-aware you can push yourself to appreciate your good days when you have these)
You Learn Positive Coping Mechanisms (this would be ways to support yourself & get out of your funk when it’s time, ways to not obsess over what did or didn’t happen, do something you enjoy like taking a bath, working out, reading, puzzles, time with pets, calling a friend, cleaning, ect.)
No One is Perfect & Can Have All Good Days (but you’ll see what you can get through & that tells you more about yourself than pretending to be perfect & manage it all)

Thank you again for listening & I hope this episode was helpful.

Come visit me on my Instagram page @sabrinajoyperozzo.

Have any questions, comments or feedback? Send me an email at [email protected] or check out my website, www.sabrinajoy.c

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RealPositiveGirl - Weekly Encouragement & Mental Health - Struggling Doesn't Mean You're Failing - Keep Going

Transcript

00:00:03.740

Hello everyone. And welcome to the real positive girl podcast with me, Sabrina. This is the show that's gonna help you become your best self. And today we are talking about struggling. Doesn't mean you are failing, but before we jump into that as always, I want to invite you to come say hi to me on Instagram, I'm at Sabrina joy. Proso I also have a great email address for you to send any sort of like questions, comments, concerns, pro feedback, topic to become friends