Anna Cusack on Reframing The Postpartum Period, The Power of Letting Go and Mothering as Activism
10/10/23 • 50 min
Hi mama. In this episode, I’m joined by Anna Cusack, a Doula, Speaker, Author and Podcaster who supports women by providing emotional support, advice, resources and organisational assistance through pregnancy decision-making, birth mapping, postpartum planning, birth debriefing and guidance throughout the early stages of parenting.
In this conversation, we discuss Anna’s experience of becoming a mother, both in the initial fourth trimester period, and in the months that followed this. We reflect on how the postpartum period is in many ways a lifelong stage, and Anna speaks to her own experience of feeling relatively prepared for the initial fourth trimester period, compared to the later months where she found herself unprepared for the intensity of the period that followed. This was further heightened for Anna by this period of time coinciding with the pandemic.
We also discussed:
· The power of letting go and surrender, how this relates to so many facets of mothering, & Anna’s own experience of this in relation to both her fertility journey prior to conceiving, and her experience of going into labour with her first child.
· The need to slow down in motherhood and how Anna’s awareness of her own tendencies to pull against this meant that she resolutely committed to taking rest seriously in her early stages of motherhood, setting boundaries around her activity.
· Reframing the value of motherhood in society and how mothering is activism in itself in the sense that how we consciously choose to raise our children affects not only their lives & how they navigate the world but also shapes the world in which we all live – & also the balance of holding this whilst also honouring the stage of life you are in and what you have the capacity for.
· Gender differences in children with regard to privilege, and Anna’s feelings around the implications of this in terms of how to raise her children to be responsible adults.
· Our shared experience of how motherhood can bring with it an increased sense of confidence with regard to living life authentically, in alignment and with integrity.
... and much much more. I hope you love listening to it as much as I loved having it.
Here is where you can find out more about me (Yara), how to work with me and some resources:
*** Waitlist for The Rebirth, Group Coaching for Mamas *** This is my signature 3 months online group coaching container for mothers which covers family of origin, inner child work, nervous system basics, anger, boundaries and much more.
Free Values Aligned Living Workbook
Find out more about Anna in these places:
You can purchase Anna’s book “Mama, You’re Not Broken: Unmasking the Unspoken Emotions of Modern Motherhood”
Looking for support for anger while you mother? To access my Why Am I So Angry Workshop click HERE
Hi mama. In this episode, I’m joined by Anna Cusack, a Doula, Speaker, Author and Podcaster who supports women by providing emotional support, advice, resources and organisational assistance through pregnancy decision-making, birth mapping, postpartum planning, birth debriefing and guidance throughout the early stages of parenting.
In this conversation, we discuss Anna’s experience of becoming a mother, both in the initial fourth trimester period, and in the months that followed this. We reflect on how the postpartum period is in many ways a lifelong stage, and Anna speaks to her own experience of feeling relatively prepared for the initial fourth trimester period, compared to the later months where she found herself unprepared for the intensity of the period that followed. This was further heightened for Anna by this period of time coinciding with the pandemic.
We also discussed:
· The power of letting go and surrender, how this relates to so many facets of mothering, & Anna’s own experience of this in relation to both her fertility journey prior to conceiving, and her experience of going into labour with her first child.
· The need to slow down in motherhood and how Anna’s awareness of her own tendencies to pull against this meant that she resolutely committed to taking rest seriously in her early stages of motherhood, setting boundaries around her activity.
· Reframing the value of motherhood in society and how mothering is activism in itself in the sense that how we consciously choose to raise our children affects not only their lives & how they navigate the world but also shapes the world in which we all live – & also the balance of holding this whilst also honouring the stage of life you are in and what you have the capacity for.
· Gender differences in children with regard to privilege, and Anna’s feelings around the implications of this in terms of how to raise her children to be responsible adults.
· Our shared experience of how motherhood can bring with it an increased sense of confidence with regard to living life authentically, in alignment and with integrity.
... and much much more. I hope you love listening to it as much as I loved having it.
Here is where you can find out more about me (Yara), how to work with me and some resources:
*** Waitlist for The Rebirth, Group Coaching for Mamas *** This is my signature 3 months online group coaching container for mothers which covers family of origin, inner child work, nervous system basics, anger, boundaries and much more.
Free Values Aligned Living Workbook
Find out more about Anna in these places:
You can purchase Anna’s book “Mama, You’re Not Broken: Unmasking the Unspoken Emotions of Modern Motherhood”
Looking for support for anger while you mother? To access my Why Am I So Angry Workshop click HERE
Previous Episode
Dr Veronica Eyo on Embracing Change & Developing the Skill of Mothering with Compassion
Hi mama. In this episode of Life After Birth, I’m joined by Veronica Eyo, a maternal mental health therapist who helps mothers as they navigate their motherhood journey, as well as managing symptoms of perinatal mental health.
In this conversation, we discuss Veronica’s experience of becoming a mother, and how her reality differed from her pre-motherhood expectation of what it would be like, particularly in the wake of experiencing a difficult birth, which resulted in her entering motherhood carrying feelings of failure. We explore the problematic belief that women are intrinsically natural mothers, and the importance of instead seeing it as a skill to be learned and honed as you go, developing through observation, practice, and trial and error.
We also discussed:
· The importance of learning to embrace rest in motherhood and the challenges so many of us face in this, especially those with a background of marginalisation where rest simply isn’t in the makeup of our ancestors and was not always available for them.
· The importance of embracing the current season of motherhood you are in, and the challenge of having to stay flexible with your values when it comes to motherhood.
· Honouring past versions of yourself as well as truly valuing the new behaviours, activities and beliefs that come with the act of mothering, in this new season of your life.
· The challenges of parenting in a way that honours the spirit of your children and how effortful this can be, especially for those who haven’t had experience of this themselves, as there is no blueprint to follow.
I absolutely loved speaking to Veronica and I hope you enjoy listening to our conversation too.
Here is where you can find out more about me (Yara), how to work with me and some resources:
*** Waitlist for The Rebirth, Group Coaching for Mamas *** This is my signature 3 months online group coaching container for mothers which covers family of origin, inner child work, nervous system basics, anger, boundaries and much more.
Free Values Aligned Living Workbook
Find out more about Veronica in these places:
https://www.drveronicalcsw.com/
Looking for support for anger while you mother? To access my Why Am I So Angry Workshop click HERE
Next Episode
Minna Dubin on Rage, Compassion, and Challenging 'Good Mother' Assumptions
Hey there mamas and welcome back to another episode of Life After Birth.
In this episode, I’m speaking to Minna Dubin, the Author of ‘Mom Rage: The Everyday Crisis of Modern Motherhood.’ I absolutely loved this book and was so excited to invite Minna to speak with me for this episode. Minna’s writing has been featured in The New York Times, The Times, Salon, Parents, Romper, Oprah Daily, MUTHA Magazine and many other publications. As a leading feminist voice on mom rage, Minna has also appeared on MSNBC, Good Morning America, The Tamron Hall Show, NBC10 Boston and NPR. Minna is from California and lives with her husband and two children.
In this conversation, we talked about Minna’s experience of becoming a mother and what her difficulties were during this time. We talk about rage in motherhood, exploring the social elements that play a role in this and the power of treating your anger with compassion.
We also discussed:
· The intensity that can come with difficult seasons of motherhood and the importance in having faith and self-belief that you can and will make it through these challenging times. We also discuss the power of drawing on previous experiences of when you have overcome challenging times to help foster this belief.
· The need for time, space and separateness in mothering and how this is often perceived negatively in our society due to patriarchal internalised modelling that has led to the belief that a ‘good’ mother wants to be around her children and husband all the time and who doesn’t have needs of her own.
· Minna’s identity as being a bisexual Queer woman married to a cis-man, how becoming a mother intensified this experience and how she used writing to help process her second ‘coming out’ experience once she was a mother, and the part this played in her returning to herself.
The internalised belief of the “good mother - good child” association that is held in many facets of our society, and how this can manifest in relation to neurodiversity and behavioural differences in children.
And much more. I hope you feel seen and heard by listening to this conversation, and enjoy it as much as I did.
Here is where you can find out more about me (Yara), how to work with me and some resources:
*** Waitlist for The Rebirth, Group Coaching for Mamas *** This is my signature 3 months online group coaching container for mothers which covers family of origin, inner child work, nervous system basics, anger, boundaries and much more.
Free Values Aligned Living Workbook
Find out more about Minna in these places:
www.minnadubin.com
Minna on Instagram
You can purchase Minna’s book “Mom Rage: The Everyday Crisis Of Modern Motherhood” here – it’s an incredible, comprehensive and detailed exploration on the rage felt my mothers, and I hugely recommend giving it a read!
Looking for support for anger while you mother? To access my Why Am I So Angry Workshop click HERE
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