15 Amie Lands | Child Loss, Cancer and Life’s Trauma
10/17/22 • 39 min
Today I speak with Amie where she shares how her life started with the loss of connection to her father due to mental illness and the challenging relationship with her alcoholic mother.
Amie then became pregnant for the first time, but her daughter Ruthie died after 33 days.
At 36 years, Amie was diagnosed with neck cancer which was successfully treated. She then shares how they moved across the States and their truck caught fire with many of their belongings including Ruthie’s memories gone.
Dealing with all those extreme situations, Amie learned and practiced one thing:
‘I live in this moment. I try not to think too much ahead of what's to come next or what so many call future tripping. I don't put myself in what could happen and so I really truly live today. I have a calendar and plan ahead, but I really just try and be in this moment.’
About this week’s guest
Amie Lands is the author of Navigating the Unknown, Our Only Time, Perfectly Imperfect Family, and the Tending to Your Heart series. She is a cancer survivor, founder of The Ruthie Lou Foundation, and a Certified Grief Recovery Specialist®. Since her daughter’s brief life, Amie’s passion is offering hope and providing support to bereaved families. Amie lives in South Carolina, United States with her husband and their two sons.
Amie’s website: www.amielandsauthor.com
Instagram: @amielandsauthor
Topics discussed in this episode
- Early loss of her father through mental illness
- Early child loss and pregnancy after loss
- A neck cancer diagnosis at the age of 36
- Moving across the States and a fire that destroyed many personal belongings
- How to love somebody that isn’t part of your life
- Learning to ask for help
Resources mentioned in this episode
- The Me You Can’t See (show on mental illness, Apple TV)
Links
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Today I speak with Amie where she shares how her life started with the loss of connection to her father due to mental illness and the challenging relationship with her alcoholic mother.
Amie then became pregnant for the first time, but her daughter Ruthie died after 33 days.
At 36 years, Amie was diagnosed with neck cancer which was successfully treated. She then shares how they moved across the States and their truck caught fire with many of their belongings including Ruthie’s memories gone.
Dealing with all those extreme situations, Amie learned and practiced one thing:
‘I live in this moment. I try not to think too much ahead of what's to come next or what so many call future tripping. I don't put myself in what could happen and so I really truly live today. I have a calendar and plan ahead, but I really just try and be in this moment.’
About this week’s guest
Amie Lands is the author of Navigating the Unknown, Our Only Time, Perfectly Imperfect Family, and the Tending to Your Heart series. She is a cancer survivor, founder of The Ruthie Lou Foundation, and a Certified Grief Recovery Specialist®. Since her daughter’s brief life, Amie’s passion is offering hope and providing support to bereaved families. Amie lives in South Carolina, United States with her husband and their two sons.
Amie’s website: www.amielandsauthor.com
Instagram: @amielandsauthor
Topics discussed in this episode
- Early loss of her father through mental illness
- Early child loss and pregnancy after loss
- A neck cancer diagnosis at the age of 36
- Moving across the States and a fire that destroyed many personal belongings
- How to love somebody that isn’t part of your life
- Learning to ask for help
Resources mentioned in this episode
- The Me You Can’t See (show on mental illness, Apple TV)
Links
--> For more information, please visit Nathalie’s website.
--> Subscribe to the newsletter to receive updates on future episodes here
--> Join the podcast’s Instagram page.
Thanks for listening to HOW TO DEAL WITH GRIEF AND TRAUMA. If you’d like to be updated on future episodes, pl
Find support:
Support the show:
- Become a supporter of the show! Starting at $3/month
- Join Facebook Group - Grief and Trauma Support Network
- Download the FREE grief resource eBook
- Book a Discovery Call
- Leave a review
Follow on socials:
Previous Episode
14 Simone Surgeoner | Loss of Significant Men
Today Simone and I talk about losing the most significant men in her life. She dealt with the loss of her life partner through cancer, the sudden death of her father, and the dissolution of two marriages. After all these losses she investigated into the masculine, and she found an appreciation for the male aspect in her life and in herself.
She describes the experience of grief’s intensity in the following way:
‘The pain and intensity of it has not lessened in those moments. Yes, there are fewer and further between, but ... it's okay now because I know that it comes up like a huge wave and it feels so overwhelming in the moment, but I know that it's going to leave now so it doesn't topple me over. But I'm still always quite... It's almost like impressed with that level of grief does not abate when it comes up.’
About this week’s guest
Simone Surgeoner is a therapist and mentor who has helped thousands of people find their own authentic path in life. She enjoys nothing more than exploring the depths of what it means to be human. Using herself as her own guinea pig, Simone demonstrates beingness as arising from integrity with one’s essence. Helping people find their inner truth, through their own direct experience, is the core of Simone’s work.
Simone’s website: www.saksana.com.au
Topics discussed in this episode
- Loss of life partner
- Loss of her father
- Loss of relationships, divorce
- Loss of a lifestyle, home, relationships, values, dreams, identity, religion
- Supporting children who lost their father
- Child’s experience of grief
- Giving herself a full year of grief
Resources mentioned in this episode
Links
--> For more information, please visit Nathalie’s website.
--> Subscribe to the newsletter to receive updates on future episodes here.
--> Join the podcast’s Instagram page.
Thanks for listening to HOW TO DEAL WITH GRIEF AND TRAUMA. If you’d like to be updated on future episodes, please subscribe to my newsletter on Nathalie Himmelrich.com
If you need grief support, please contact me for a FREE 30 min discovery session.
HOW TO DEAL WITH GRIEF AND TRAUMA is produced and edited by me, Nathalie Himmelrich.
Support this
Find support:
Support the show:
- Become a supporter of the show! Starting at $3/month
- Join Facebook Group - Grief and Trauma Support Network
- Download the FREE grief resource eBook
- Book a Discovery Call
- Leave a review
Follow on socials:
Next Episode
16 Lisa Boehm | The Loss of Her Teenage Daughter
Lisa Boehm heard a knock at the door just as she had gone to bed, and it was the police coming to let her know that her teenage daughter had died in a head-on collision.
Lisa tells us how she picked up the pieces of her shattered life and how she found ways to thrive and not just survive. From getting support from other moms in her community she now offers support to grieving moms.
Lisa says:
‘I think I learned a lot from other grieving moms who were further down the path. Sometimes it was just little snippets that they would say or different things... They gave me hope and I think learning that everybody copes with grief differently, that little nugget right there was enough to carry us through.’
About this week’s guest
Lisa K. Boehm’s life changed forever when her daughter died suddenly in a car accident. She quickly discovered that our society struggles with death, loss, and grieving and has made it her mission to change that. In her book Journey to HEALING: A Mother’s Guide to Navigating Child Loss, she shares her experience with grief and how it intensified her love for her daughter. Now she focuses on gratitude and living intentionally as a way to honor her daughter’s memory. Lisa is an author, speaker, and certified grief educator who helps bereaved moms move beyond the pain to find peace and purpose.
Website: www.griefsupportformoms.com
IG @griefsupportformoms
Topics discussed in this episode
- The loss of her teenage daughter Katie
- Suicidal thoughts and anger
- Surrounding herself with other women in the community
- Journaling as a resource to deal with grief
- Differences in grieving styles among family members
- Teenager’s grief/sibling’s grief
Resources mentioned in this episode
- Instrumental and intuitive grieving styles described in the book Grieving Parents: Surviving Loss as a Couple
- Grief groups by the Compassionate Friends
Links
--> For more information, please visit Nathalie’s website.
--> Subscribe to the newsletter to receive updates on future episodes here.
--> Join the podcast’s Instagram page.
Thanks for listening to HOW TO DEAL WITH
Find support:
Support the show:
- Become a supporter of the show! Starting at $3/month
- Join Facebook Group - Grief and Trauma Support Network
- Download the FREE grief resource eBook
- Book a Discovery Call
- Leave a review
Follow on socials:
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