Housewives On Housewives

"I'm going to knock you out!" just as soon as I get myself up off the floor. Sonja is okay after her drunken fall, but Bethenny calls the paramedics to double make sure. The next morning, after Luann screams for coffee, she gives herself more space from the ladies that "attacked her the night before'."
All the ladies agree that Luann is a narcissist, but she will 1. never be aware, B. never acknowledge, C. admit to it. After a morning lounging by the pool, the ladies head out for an afternoon of culture at Wynwood Walls. Ramona notifies the ladies at the last possible moment that she's ditching them for a bigger, better deal, but it's Ramona who misses out on being gifted thousands in signed art. The ladies get ready for the most boring, slow party that we can imagine. Although, it's nice to see Mario there. Is anyone else gagging at Ramona's flirting and the way Sonja slurps up fish?

Luann is rehearsing her Christmas Cabaret. How fabulous?! Sonja shows up unexpected, uninvited, and uninterrupted. Dorinda gets to host the iconic tree lighting that no one's ever heard of. She then threatens Luann with lawyers and Sonja threatens to go manic if she's called manic. The ladies head to Miami and stay in a place fit for "Scarface." Dorinda and Sonja get drunk within minutes of arriving and harass the staff, who clearly deserve more money. Bethenny tells Luann what everyone has been saying all along - life is not a cabaret, you can't tell everyone Sonja is on pills, and it's not right to make out with Sonja's guys. Sonja finally goes down without a fight. Literally.

The ladies are headed up to Luann's "bird's nest." But first, Dorinda has some errands to run in her new hood. Bethenny meets up with Ramona and Tinsley. Tinsley fills Bethenny in on Sonja's attacking her for talking about her rough patch. Sonja and Barbara arrive to Luann's a night early, where they school Luann and then share some girl gossip. After Dorinda, Tinsley and Bethenny arrive upstate, Bethenny and Luann begin to get into Luann's cabaret behavior. Ramona still hasn't made it due to her birthday extravaganza thrown by her "best" friends.

The morning after Camille's wedding, the ladies are in Hawaii and meet up with the bride - and only the bride - for brunch. Conversation quickly turns to how crummy it was that LVP skipped the wedding. Two short hours later, the ladies realize, via a "People Magazine" article, that Camille is talking out of both sides of her mouth . Back in Beverly Hills, Kyle and Rinna get their yearly mammogram done. Thanks for the PSA, ladies! Everyone gets all slutty for Farrahween. Rinna wins best costume ever as Erika Jayne and refuses to break character. But she takes it over the top when she runs into Kim Richards and uses foul language to express Lisa Rinna's hurt over the bunny. Somehow we end with everyone getting along, but we are not expecting that to last long.

We open in a closet where Lisa Vanderpump is getting a lie detector test (dogs are allowed). Kyle, Dorit, Teddi and Rinna, along with a couple of husbands, head to Hawaii for Camille's wedding. While there, Rinna nurses a sore throat while the other ladies play. Later they gather at Camillie's house for a pre-wedding dinner, where the cheese wheel bowl makes another appearance. In between, we see very little of Denise and none of Erika or Vanderpump, and we missed them all terribly. Maurico tries pot for the first time. And congratulations to Mrs. Camille Frazier Crane Kelsey Grammer Meyer.