Blessings in Disguise With Andrew T. Shaw

01/09/23 • 28 min

The impact of losing a loved one differs for each person. Death, with its brutal certainty, carries a mysterious beauty for some people. It may be a blessing in disguise sometimes. Though the blessings may be hard to see at first, embracing them allows us to cherish life and the memory of those we have lost. Acknowledging the pain, hurt, and loneliness that follows grief is essential because you are not alone in your journey.

Join this conversation with your host Marie Betcher as coach Andrew T. Shaw joins her. In 2019, just after Christmas, Andrew suffered the heartbreaking loss of his father. Amidst his grief, he continues to find solace in counting the blessings bestowed upon him during the final week in Hospice. Each person's end-of-life journey is unique, yet many powerful parallels exist. Andrew documented those experiences in a book, “Cheers, Dad," that can be found as an audiobook in Audible and also on Amazon. By sharing the blessings experienced in those last days and embracing their significance in this episode, Andrew will motivate you to discover strength and comfort to navigate this difficult period.

Tune in!

Key Highlights from the Episode;

[00:00] Introduction to the show and quick bio of the quest; Andrew T. Shaw

[03:13] Andrew’s backstory and what he does in his space to make the world better

[05:21] Name of Andrew’s book and how you can get your copy

[07:54] The six months of Andrew’s dad in hospice care

[08:46] The unmatched benefits of starting hospice care sooner

[10:11] How hospice helps one get rid of the fear of death

[12:52] Andrew’s double tragedy of an injured mum while dad was in hospice

[16:23] The availability of nurses in the six months of his dad’s hospice care

[17:25] Things Andrew had to fix and adjust while going through hospice

[18:55] Experiences of his dad’s last week before passing on

[24:29] One of the greatest moments of communication he had with his dad

[27:33] The hard question to ask your loved one

[27:55] Wrap-up and end of the show

Notable Quotes

● It’s always a blessing when hospice is started earlier. [08:46]

● Most people are never into the reality of death. Hospice aims to remove that fear and get you mentally ready. [10:11]

● As hard as it can be, you must gain the courage to ask your loved one how they would want a celebration of their life well lived to look like. [27:35]

Resources Mentioned

Marie’s other podcast, Hospice Encounters: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/hospice-encounters/id1622451693
Andrew’s Audiobook: https://www.audible.com/pd/Cheers-Dad-Audiobook/B0BKR4JBPD
CHEERS, DAD: Blessings from his last week in Hospice by Andrew T. Shaw: https://amzn.to/3CBiTmd

Share An Encounter?

If you would like to share an encounter with hospice, please email me at [email protected]

Do you want to Support this podcast with a coffee? You can do so here: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/hospice.

Marie's Contact: [email protected] www.hospiceexplained.com http://buymeacoffee.com/hospice [email protected] Leave a Voicemail: 206-705-3080

Blessings in Disguise With Andrew T. Shaw

Tune in!

Key Highlights from the Episode;

[00:00] Introduction to the show and quick bio of the quest; Andrew T. Shaw

[03:13] Andrew’s backstory and what he does in his space to make the world better

[05:21] Name of Andrew’s book and how you can get your copy

[07:54] The six months of Andrew’s dad in hospice care

[08:46] The unmatched benefits of starting hospice care sooner

[10:11] How hospice helps one get rid of the fear of death

[12:52] Andrew’s double tragedy of an injured mum while dad was in hospice

[16:23] The availability of nurses in the six months of his dad’s hospice care

[17:25] Things Andrew had to fix and adjust while going through hospice

[18:55] Experiences of his dad’s last week before passing on

[24:29] One of the greatest moments of communication he had with his dad

[27:33] The hard question to ask your loved one

[27:55] Wrap-up and end of the show

Notable Quotes

● It’s always a blessing when hospice is started earlier. [08:46]

● Most people are never into the reality of death. Hospice aims to remove that fear and get you mentally ready. [10:11]

● As hard as it can be, you must gain the courage to ask your loved one how they would want a celebration of their life well lived to look like. [27:35]

Resources Mentioned

Marie’s other podcast, Hospice Encounters: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/hospice-encounters/id1622451693
Andrew’s Audiobook: https://www.audible.com/pd/Cheers-Dad-Audiobook/B0BKR4JBPD
CHEERS, DAD: Blessings from his last week in Hospice by Andrew T. Shaw: https://amzn.to/3CBiTmd

Share An Encounter?

If you would like to share an encounter with hospice, please email me at [email protected]

Do you want to Support this podcast with a coffee? You can do so here: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/hospice.

Marie's Contact: [email protected] www.hospiceexplained.com http://buymeacoffee.com/hospice [email protected] Leave a Voicemail: 206-705-3080

Previous Episode

Making a Difference-Helping others and Grief

EP. 48 Making a Difference-Helping Others and Grief

It is wonderful to lend a hand to our friends and coworkers when they are in need because even small gestures can mean a lot over time. Imagine if your friend is going through a tough situation where a loved one is in hospice care. With all the patient's important care, it is kind to be there for your friend. This might involve helping with things like laundry, taking care of their kids, tidying up, or just showing empathy in any small way you can think of.

When you do this, it is important to ensure your actions have a positive and lasting impact. Especially when someone is grieving, your support matters a great deal. Join this conversation with Marie as she shares more about how we can make a difference in someone’s life by helping them, even in grief.

Tune in!

Key Highlights from the Episode;

[00:30] Episode intro and what is in for you in today’s episode

[01:50] Key milestones in the podcast, courtesy of your help

[02:43] Two of the most kind reviews about the podcast

[03:30] How you can email Marie for some great hospice reads

[03:52] Ways you can support the podcast through “buy me a coffee”

[04:11] The golden benefits of helping your friends going through hospice

[05:37] How to be of help to others

[05:47] Helping a grieving friend

[06:28] Previous episodes on helping someone during grief that you can listen

[07:15] Golden takeaways from the episode

[08:29] Ending show and calls to action

Notable Quotes

As we all want to help our friends undergoing hospice care with their loved ones, it is good to do that in a way that leaves a lasting, happy impression on someone’s life. [05:37]

Resources Mentioned

Forgrief.com

https://www.lovealwaysproject.org/

Let’s Connect

Marie's Contact:

[email protected]

www.hospiceexplained.com

http://buymeacoffee.com/hospice

[email protected]

Leave a Voicemail: 206-705-3080

Next Episode

Speaking Their Name: Keys to Supporting the Bereaved with Alison Potter from Give a Mile

End-of-life, death, bereavement, and grief are undeniably sensitive topics, but they are an inherent part of the human experience. When someone loses a loved one, grief becomes an inevitable companion, and receiving the right support becomes essential for fostering a healthy outcome. Grief is an intrinsic aspect of love, representing a lifelong response that brings about profound changes in an individual. During such trying times, providing authentic support to those who are grieving becomes paramount, devoid of dismissive phrases like "I know how you feel" or superficial reassurances. Being present, choosing our words with care, and sharing cherished memories of the deceased while acknowledging them by name can offer solace and validation. This way, we provide an opportunity to honor the departed by speaking their name aloud once again. In a candid discussion, Alison Potter delves into the intricacies of grief and comfort, recounting her personal journey after losing her husband. She also sheds light on the valuable work of Give A Mile in the end-of-life space, and her business, Expected Outcome.

Alison is a palliative RN and a volunteer with Give A Mile, a registered charity in both Canada and the US. Their mission is to provide flights for people at end-of-life to connect with their loved ones for a final goodbye. Since they started, they have given away nine hundred and sixty-four (964) free flights, and their goal is to make it a thousand (1000) this year, their tenth anniversary year. Alison has been a Registered Nurse for almost 40 years, worked for over 25 years as a Palliative Care Nurse in Palliative Home Care, Palliative Consult Team in Acute Care, and was the Director of Clinical Care at Rosedale Hospice in Calgary from 2009 to 2018. Allison launched her business, Expected Outcome, in May 2022 to support and educate people on death, grief, and bereavement.

Tune in!

Key Highlights from the Episode;

[00:30] Episode intro and a quick bio of the guest; Alison potter

[00:56] Give A Mile, the Why behind it, and what they offer in the end-of-life space

[06:16] Alison’s role as an outreach coordinator and flight recipient at Give A Mile

[07:34] How to donate money or miles to Give A Mile and how they work

[09:39] Inspiring stories of recent flight applicants’ unforgeable reunion experiences

[16:09] The maximum amount Give A Mile provides and why they don’t disclose it

[17:26] Grief and how Allison supports people through her business “Expected Outcome.”

[20:57] Why sharing stories and using the name of the deceased is priceless

[25:44] Alison’s word of encouragement to those grieving for pets

[29:09] Wrap-up and end of the show

Notable Quotes

● End-of-life care can be anywhere; residential hospice, home, hospital, and long-term care center, or in an ICU where the outcome is uncertain and someone is not expected to survive. [04:04]

● Telling someone grieving that you know how they feel, they can have another baby, or time heals our wounds hurts because it doesn’t; grief is a price for love, and it’s lifelong. [19:04]

● Be there, say the right things, and talk about the disease by name, grief is already sad, and by doing this, you are not making them sadder; you are giving them an opportunity to get their loved one name out loud again. [21:48]

Let’s Connect

Alison Potter

Website: https://giveamile.org/

Website: https://expectedoutcome.ca/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alison-potter-rn-bscn-chpcn-b449064b/?

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/thealybird

Marie's Contact: [email protected] www.hospiceexplained.com http://buymeacoffee.com/hospice [email protected] Leave a Voicemail: 206-705-3080