The 2 Brain Biases That Work Against Love

03/24/22 • 34 min

074 We all are born with 2 particular “biases” of our brains that make lasting love difficult...that is, until we understand them and learn to overcome them!

These innate biases are simply ways our human brains (highly sensitive or not) naturally function that lead to perceiving the world–and our partner –in certain predictable ways.

If you ever feel resentful, disappointed in, frustrated with, or hurt by your partner...if the same issues are coming up in this relationship that came up in past ones, if you feel less respect, attraction or admiration of your husband than you wish– or you generally just aren’t as happy as you’d like to be in your marriage, I can guarantee that’s at least in part because of these 2 biases.

When we do not understand these biases and how they operate hand in hand, we live our lives at their effect–meaning they rule our experience of love. For the worse...

It’s almost like they cast a painful spell on us (what I call Real but not True syndrome) ... leaving us feeling very real painful feelings and wreaking havoc in our marriages. Interestingly, these feelings aren’t based on truth. They are based on your brain’s biased, subjective, distorted way of seeing things.

Today, I give you the understanding you need to see how these 2 innate biases are negatively affecting your own marriage, and share how you can rise above them by consciously choosing to not fall under their spell–so you can feel so much more of all the good stuff in your marriage, and have a love that lasts for the long haul.

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074 We all are born with 2 particular “biases” of our brains that make lasting love difficult...that is, until we understand them and learn to overcome them!

These innate biases are simply ways our human brains (highly sensitive or not) naturally function that lead to perceiving the world–and our partner –in certain predictable ways.

When we do not understand these biases and how they operate hand in hand, we live our lives at their effect–meaning they rule our experience of love. For the worse...

ENJOYING THE SHOW?

Get the HSHM Podcast Map, so you can quickly identify the episodes most helpful for your unique relationship, by supporting the podcast (for as little as $3) HERE.
Don’t miss an episode! Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Stitcher.
Leave a review in Apple Podcasts--we are SO grateful!

SHOW NOTES
Set Up Your Consult Here
Get More Free Support, Courses and Coaching HERE.

Previous Episode

Can You Become Less Sensitive?

073 Can highly sensitive people become less sensitive? Many HSPs wonder this! And many experts say no.

I have a slightly different take, one that will bring you hope, clarity, and motivation. In this episode I share what I know is possible to change and what isn’t when it comes to being sensitive–especially when it comes to emotional sensitivity.
I break down for you the 5 most common approaches to handling emotions that actually lead to what many of us consider the bad part of being sensitive–in other words, ways of handling our deep feelings that don’t work so well in our relationships, especially.
And I share with you what you need to know, and what you need to be focusing on to not only avoid being “sensitive'' in the worst sense of the word, but also to experience your sensitivity as the special gift it is–one that brings the heights of love and joy into your own life and relationships.
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Get the HSHM Podcast Map, so you can quickly identify the episodes most helpful for your unique relationship, by supporting the podcast (for as little as $3) HERE.
Don’t miss an episode! Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Stitcher.
Leave a review in Apple Podcasts--we are SO grateful!

SHOW NOTES
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Next Episode

Celebrating Vs Overlooking Growth

075 You’ve been listening to this podcast (or other ones on relationships), reading books, learning about how to have the kind of marriage you want. You're trying out new approaches. But you aren't seeing as much change as you wish...and you feel frustrated, or discouraged, or at the least, not as hopeful about things as you want to feel. Maybe you even feel like you want to quit bothering with all the effort.

If so, you are very likely making 1 simple little error: not recognizing, let alone celebrating, your successes!

This oh-so-common error comes from the wiring of our human brain (yet again!) and it seriously undermines our capacity to grow and change things in ourselves and in our marriage.

Luckily there’s a simple (and joyful) fix. One that leads to gaining deep and rapid improvement in your marriage.

In this episode I lay it all out for you and help you start seeing your success and celebrating your growth, so you can create the marriage you really want with your partner, and have fun –and a rich sense of meaning– along the way.

Don’t miss this one.
ENJOYING THE SHOW?

Get the HSHM Podcast Map, so you can quickly identify the episodes most helpful for your unique relationship, by supporting the podcast (for as little as $3) HERE.
Don’t miss an episode! Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Stitcher.
Leave a review in Apple Podcasts--we are SO grateful!

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