Ep. 53 Coping Skills to Manage Anxiety & Other Difficult Emotions in Midlife: Naming (Part 1)
09/16/23 • 36 min
Stop Trying to Feel Better and Get Better at Feeling? This pithy statement, credited to Whitney Johnson, sums up this episode. Did you know the average feeling moves through us in 90 seconds? EXCEPT, most of us disrupt this natural process by avoiding, minimizing, maximizing or soothing our emotional reactions because at about the 30 second mark feelings kinda SUCK. So, instead of tending and befriending our feelings we blame or unclaim them and do something to lessen their intensity. You know-- blame someone, eat chips, smoke a joint or two or three or binge on Netflix. In this two parter, MJ will share with you the simple method her and 50 middle school students came up with to Name, Tame and Aim our emotions. They called it potty training their emotions which helped them not to crap all over the place! In this episode, MJ and a regular listener do Step #1:Naming our Feelings. Potty training our emotions takes a bit of knowledge and bravery and a willingness to slow down and be curious when our body gives us the signal that a feeling needs to be peed out! It is impossible to have healthy self-awareness without a process to regulate and understand what information our emotions are giving us-this is a foundational to Mental Wellness! Check out the show notes where MJ shares her one pagers to help you visualize this Mental Wellness Tool!!!!!!
https://mjmurrayvachon.com/podcast-6/
https://mjmurrayvachon.com/podcast-7/
Creating Midlife Calm is a podcast designed to guide you through the challenges of midlife, tackling issues like anxiety, low self-esteem, feeling unworthy, procrastination, and isolation, while offering strategies for improving relationships, family support, emotional wellbeing, mental wellness, and parenting, with a focus on mindfulness, stress management, coping skills, and personal growth to stop rumination, overthinking, and increase confidence through self-care, emotional healing, and mental health support.
****
About the Host:
MJ Murray Vachon LCSW is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with more than 48,000 hours of therapy sessions and 31 years of experience teaching her Mental Wellness curriculum, Inner Challenge. Four years ago she overcame her fear of technology to create a podcast that integrated her vast clinical experience and practical wisdom of cultivating mental wellness using the latest information from neuroscience. MJ was Social Worker of the Year in 2011 for Region 2/IN.
Creating Midlife Calm is a podcast designed to guide you through the challenges of midlife, tackling issues like anxiety, low self-esteem, feeling unworthy, procrastination, and isolation, while offering strategies for improving relationships, family support, emotional wellbeing, mental wellness, and parenting, with a focus on mindfulness, stress management, coping skills, and personal growth to stop rumination, overthinking, and increase confidence through self-care, emotional healing, and mental health support.
Stop Trying to Feel Better and Get Better at Feeling? This pithy statement, credited to Whitney Johnson, sums up this episode. Did you know the average feeling moves through us in 90 seconds? EXCEPT, most of us disrupt this natural process by avoiding, minimizing, maximizing or soothing our emotional reactions because at about the 30 second mark feelings kinda SUCK. So, instead of tending and befriending our feelings we blame or unclaim them and do something to lessen their intensity. You know-- blame someone, eat chips, smoke a joint or two or three or binge on Netflix. In this two parter, MJ will share with you the simple method her and 50 middle school students came up with to Name, Tame and Aim our emotions. They called it potty training their emotions which helped them not to crap all over the place! In this episode, MJ and a regular listener do Step #1:Naming our Feelings. Potty training our emotions takes a bit of knowledge and bravery and a willingness to slow down and be curious when our body gives us the signal that a feeling needs to be peed out! It is impossible to have healthy self-awareness without a process to regulate and understand what information our emotions are giving us-this is a foundational to Mental Wellness! Check out the show notes where MJ shares her one pagers to help you visualize this Mental Wellness Tool!!!!!!
https://mjmurrayvachon.com/podcast-6/
https://mjmurrayvachon.com/podcast-7/
Creating Midlife Calm is a podcast designed to guide you through the challenges of midlife, tackling issues like anxiety, low self-esteem, feeling unworthy, procrastination, and isolation, while offering strategies for improving relationships, family support, emotional wellbeing, mental wellness, and parenting, with a focus on mindfulness, stress management, coping skills, and personal growth to stop rumination, overthinking, and increase confidence through self-care, emotional healing, and mental health support.
****
About the Host:
MJ Murray Vachon LCSW is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with more than 48,000 hours of therapy sessions and 31 years of experience teaching her Mental Wellness curriculum, Inner Challenge. Four years ago she overcame her fear of technology to create a podcast that integrated her vast clinical experience and practical wisdom of cultivating mental wellness using the latest information from neuroscience. MJ was Social Worker of the Year in 2011 for Region 2/IN.
Creating Midlife Calm is a podcast designed to guide you through the challenges of midlife, tackling issues like anxiety, low self-esteem, feeling unworthy, procrastination, and isolation, while offering strategies for improving relationships, family support, emotional wellbeing, mental wellness, and parenting, with a focus on mindfulness, stress management, coping skills, and personal growth to stop rumination, overthinking, and increase confidence through self-care, emotional healing, and mental health support.
Previous Episode
Ep.52 No-Cost Ways to Renewing Your Anxious & Weary Spirit in Midlife
Welcome to Season 3!!! One of the most underutilized tools in cultivating mental wellness is your spirit!It's with you from the minute you're born so why not figure out how to use it to feel better? Join MJ for this 20 minute episode where she shares 10 Inner Challenge Insights to help you figure out how to boost your spirit. Our contemporary culture bombards us with a barrage of superficial solutions that promise quick fixes for our spirits. Yet, deep down, we sense the emptiness these "false spirits" leave behind. Join MJ as she shares her wisdom and helps you transform your spirit from dimmer to shimmer! Check out MJ's one pager for this episode:
https://mjmurrayvachon.com/podcast-13/
Creating Midlife Calm is a podcast designed to guide you through the challenges of midlife, tackling issues like anxiety, low self-esteem, feeling unworthy, procrastination, and isolation, while offering strategies for improving relationships, family support, emotional wellbeing, mental wellness, and parenting, with a focus on mindfulness, stress management, coping skills, and personal growth to stop rumination, overthinking, and increase confidence through self-care, emotional healing, and mental health support.
****
About the Host:
MJ Murray Vachon LCSW is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with more than 48,000 hours of therapy sessions and 31 years of experience teaching her Mental Wellness curriculum, Inner Challenge. Four years ago she overcame her fear of technology to create a podcast that integrated her vast clinical experience and practical wisdom of cultivating mental wellness using the latest information from neuroscience. MJ was Social Worker of the Year in 2011 for Region 2/IN.
Creating Midlife Calm is a podcast designed to guide you through the challenges of midlife, tackling issues like anxiety, low self-esteem, feeling unworthy, procrastination, and isolation, while offering strategies for improving relationships, family support, emotional wellbeing, mental wellness, and parenting, with a focus on mindfulness, stress management, coping skills, and personal growth to stop rumination, overthinking, and increase confidence through self-care, emotional healing, and mental health support.
Next Episode
Ep. 54 Coping Skills to Manage Anxiety & Other Difficult Emotions in Midlife: Taming and Aiming (Part 2)
Want to feel better? Get better at feeling!!! In this episode MJ and her guest dive into the model MJ has created to manage feelings in a more direct and healthy way. Most of us are taught to use an external mindset to manage our feelings. You know, Blame & Unclaim--send a text complaining how awful someone is, doom scroll, eat chips or have a glass of wine or two or three... We get short term relief but nothing more. The Internal Mindset: Tend & Befriend, that MJ has created is tested and approved by junior high students. You know this age group, if it doesn't work they tell ya! The Internal Mindset uses self-awareness to help you sync up with your body and breathwork to decrease emotional intensity so you have better mental clarity--which helps you not to act in ways you regret! The hardest part of all this ---to slay the dragons of avoidance and distraction that says feelings are too uncomfortable to manage. You can do this!! Feelings are physical sensations, nothing more or nothing less! Typically they are super intense for 30-90 seconds so learn to tend and befriend them so you manage them instead of them managing you! What's your reward--better mental clarity, less rumination, and living life with lots more authenticity! The one pager in the show notes is a must!! Check it out. (Thanks to Cathy Hall, graphic artist extraordinaire. https://mjmurrayvachon.com/podcast-7/
Creating Midlife Calm is a podcast designed to guide you through the challenges of midlife, tackling issues like anxiety, low self-esteem, feeling unworthy, procrastination, and isolation, while offering strategies for improving relationships, family support, emotional wellbeing, mental wellness, and parenting, with a focus on mindfulness, stress management, coping skills, and personal growth to stop rumination, overthinking, and increase confidence through self-care, emotional healing, and mental health support.
****
About the Host:
MJ Murray Vachon LCSW is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with more than 48,000 hours of therapy sessions and 31 years of experience teaching her Mental Wellness curriculum, Inner Challenge. Four years ago she overcame her fear of technology to create a podcast that integrated her vast clinical experience and practical wisdom of cultivating mental wellness using the latest information from neuroscience. MJ was Social Worker of the Year in 2011 for Region 2/IN.
Creating Midlife Calm is a podcast designed to guide you through the challenges of midlife, tackling issues like anxiety, low self-esteem, feeling unworthy, procrastination, and isolation, while offering strategies for improving relationships, family support, emotional wellbeing, mental wellness, and parenting, with a focus on mindfulness, stress management, coping skills, and personal growth to stop rumination, overthinking, and increase confidence through self-care, emotional healing, and mental health support.
Creating Midlife Calm: Coping Skills for Stress & Anxiety in Family, Work & Relationships - Ep. 53 Coping Skills to Manage Anxiety & Other Difficult Emotions in Midlife: Naming (Part 1)
Transcript
Welcome to the podcast. Today, We're Going to talk about what I consider the second most important skill of mental wellness, emotional intelligence. After getting enough sleep, nothing helps our mental wellness more than learning to name, tame and a, our emotions. Did you know that research tells us that EQ is more of a predictor of success than IQ? Learning to identify and manage our emotions helps us increase our awareness of self a
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