Episode 32: Attachment Bonds with Jim Farm

01/17/21 • 58 min

Have you ever wondered what is one of the greatest influences on your ability to trust yourself and others? In episode 32, we talk to Jim Farm about different attachment styles that form when we are young, and how they continue to influence every relationship that we have in our adulthood. Jim describes the four attachment styles: avoidant, anxious, disorganized, and secure. These styles continue throughout our life, unless we intentionally change them.

Jim explains how an insecure attachment can inhibit our ability to be vulnerable. This impacts our relationship with others and even things, which can lead to addiction. He also shares that trauma has an impact on our attachment bonds. Towards the end, Jim shares that no matter what attachment style we developed when we were young, we can learn how to be safe and accessible individuals in our adult life. Listen to this episode to learn more!

Key Takeaways

A little about Jim and his work
What attachment is for him
What attachment styles are for him
How to develop attachment styles for him
His idea on the importance of understanding attachment styles for adults
Attachment styles concerning addiction and trauma for him
His bits of advice on unlearning insecure attachment
Who he thinks are the safe people to go to
Jim encourages the listeners to understand their relationship drivers

Book

The Seven Desires of Every Heart by Debra Laaser - https://www.amazon.com/Seven-Desires-Every-Heart-ebook/dp/B001P0XPMO

Links

Jim Farm on LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/jimfarmfaithfulandtrue/
Faithful & True website - https://faithfulandtrue.com/

Bio:

Jim is the clinical director at Faithful & True. Jim has extensive counseling experience with individuals, couples and families in multiple community and ministry settings. He provides counseling to men struggling with sexual purity issues, couples moving toward relational healing and growth, and facilitates small groups at our Men of Valor Intensive Workshops. Jim received his Master of Divinity and a Master of Arts in Marriage & Family Therapy from Bethel Seminary.

Key Takeaways

A little about Jim and his work
What attachment is for him
What attachment styles are for him
How to develop attachment styles for him
His idea on the importance of understanding attachment styles for adults
Attachment styles concerning addiction and trauma for him
His bits of advice on unlearning insecure attachment
Who he thinks are the safe people to go to
Jim encourages the listeners to understand their relationship drivers

Book

The Seven Desires of Every Heart by Debra Laaser - https://www.amazon.com/Seven-Desires-Every-Heart-ebook/dp/B001P0XPMO

Links

Jim Farm on LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/jimfarmfaithfulandtrue/
Faithful & True website - https://faithfulandtrue.com/

Bio:

Previous Episode

Episode 31: Creating Our Body Image with Dr. Katherine Iscoe

Body image is the picture we create in our mind about ourselves. It can be positive or negative, constant or ever-changing. Our parents, culture, friends, and even our thoughts contribute to how we form our body image. Are there things you would like to change about the way you look? And if those things changed, how would that impact your life? These are some of the questions we talk about in this episode with Dr. Katherine Iscoe, a leading expert in cultivating positive body image.
In this episode, we talk about the everyday struggles for men and women and how key factors and beliefs influence our self-view. Dr. Katherine also talks about how we can generate resilience in the face of stress and how to look for the much-needed ways to care for ourselves during challenging times. If you want to learn the first steps towards changing your view of your self-image, listen to this episode!
Key Takeaways

Dr. Katherine on how prevailing negative body image is
How negative body image affects one’s life for her
Her idea of gender differences in negative body image
Dr. Katherine on the impact of the brain on negative body image
How do family and social media affect negative body image for her
Her idea of gaining control over thoughts: its process and next steps
She talks about self-care versus self-obsession
Embracing body change for her
What she thinks about doing things for yourself versus doing things for others
She advises on how to change confidently
Her theory of body confidence
How to apply the step approach in the pandemic for her
How she turns stress into strength
Her advice on the importance of helping and being helped
Managing energy for her

Book

Body Confidence: The Scientific Approach on How to Shine from Within - https://www.amazon.com/Body-Confidence-Scientific-Approach-Within/dp/0646598635
Untamed by Glennon Doyle - https://untamedbook.com/

Link

Dr. Katherine Iscoe’s LinkedIn - http://au.linkedin.com/in/dr-katherine-iscoe-23601719
Dr. Katherine Iscoe’s website - www.drkatherine.com
Dr. Katherine Iscoe’s instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dr_katherine/?hl=n

Bio:
Dr Katherine Iscoe is a “Mindset Mentor”, and self-proclaimed shoe addict, with a mission to activate a person’s dormant potential through education, inspiration & a touch of tough love.
She is also a proud published author, an experienced and passionate speaker and the co-founder of the technology company MyFiziq Limited - an ASX-listed company with a multi-million-dollar market capitalisation.
Her unique approach to catalysing change, often described as an “educational and humorous roller coaster ride”, is informed by extensive research, personal experiences and academic qualifications including Bachelor of Arts in Health Sciences (Summa Cum Laude), Master of Science in Exercise Physiology and Health Sciences, a Doctorate in Exercise Physiology and Biotechnology and a Post-graduate Certificate in Counselling.
Most recently, Katherine has launched a series of new programs for individuals and teams, as well as mentoring for ambitious people wanting to make that next significant step towards their dream goals, while continuing to nurture a community that aims to bring together people from all walks of life, who inspire, support and nudge each other to accomplish great things.

Next Episode

Episode 33: Our Integrative Health with Shannon Myers

Societies over time have held different beliefs about how to look at the self and how to approach health and healing. In our westernized society, we frequently isolate the body and our physical nature when we look at health. However, in doing so, we ignore the interrelated nature of our mental, emotional, and spiritual parts and their combined impact on our health.

In this episode, we talk with Shannon Myers, an integrated medicine provider. She explains that our whole being is interconnected, and through seeing ourselves this way, we gain a better picture of what it means to be healthy and alive. Through this lens, Shannon shares what can cause both physical and mental illness, how we can approach healing, and what resources are available to us. Give this episode a listen to hear how interconnected we are as humans!

Key Takeaways

A little bit about Shannon and what keeps her occupied
The interconnectedness of the body and emotional wellbeing
On trauma: what causes it, its effects on health, and the healing modalities
On burnout: what it is, its effects on the body, and prevention
The importance of creating boundaries for her
Her approach as an integrative counselor in healing trauma and burnout
What qualifies as trauma-informed care for her
Resources she recommends on trauma-informed care
Her thoughts on being kind to yourself

Links

Shannon Myers on Linkedin - https://www.linkedin.com/in/shannon-myers-crc-cmhimp-18396648/
Psychology Today - https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl
Somatic Experiencing Training - https://traumahealing.org/
IMMH - https://www.immh.org/
IFM - https://www.ifm.org/functional-medicine/
Mindful - https://www.mindful.org/what-is-mindfulness/
Headspace app - https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.getsomeheadspace.android&hl=en&gl=US
Wake Up - https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=org.wakingup.android&hl=en&gl=US
Crisis Text Line - 741741

Bio

Shannon R. Myers, MS, CRC, CMHIMIP, is a Certified Rehabilitation Counselor, Certified Mental Health Integrative Medicine Provider, Research Fellow at The Harkin Institute, Adjunct Professor at Drake University in the Master of Counseling program, and is the Founder of Shannon Myers Consulting LLC and The Integrative Counselor, a niche, root-cause, private virtual Integrative Medicine Practice serving individuals, systems, and organizations across the U.S. Shannon is Trauma-Informed and an expert at systems change, collaboration, health outcomes, to advance Trauma-Informed, integrative, evidence-based, culturally appropriate, and innovative practices that are personalized, yet scalable; to create needed systemic change to address the bi-directional, root-cause nature of physical and mental health symptoms, disability, and prevention from the individual to the population levels.

Handles for social media:

Instagram: @The.Integrative.Counselor

Facebook: @TheIntegrativeCounselor

Twitter: @RootsCounselor