Anxiety and New Years Resolutions - Ep. 112

01/03/19 • 21 min

So...New Years Resolutions. The very thought often brings about an eye roll, anxious feelings, perhaps apathy, just to name a few. If you're like many, you don't even bother with them because you feel like the don't work anyway so what's the point. For others, the start of each new year is an opportunity to try again with a renewed sense of confidence. Either way, you're not alone.

On this second podcast episode of 2019 (as you'll hear in the podcast I actually call it the 1st episode), I thought I'd take a few minutes and catch you all up on what's been happening with the show, the direction it's headed, and some other projects I'm working on...just in case you're interested in hearing some updates.

If you are..Great, then listen right from the beginning and you'll be all set.

However, if getting those news and notes isn't really your thing, that's cool too...just forward to the 6:50 mark of the podcast where I dive in to the New Years' Resolutions, Anxiety, and setting yourself up for success as much as possible with the goals you make for yourself.

We'll dive into things like:

The worry of not accomplishing goals can stop you from even bother to set any in the first place.
Extreme thinking, an "all or nothing" mindset, and catastrophizing can lead to self-shame with your goals.
Deciding to make resolutions, or goals, is not a one shot deal, you can have as many do-overs you need.
- I share a bit more of using this "do-over" mentality to your advantage, not your detriment.
Being vigilant about imposter syndrome, and old unhealthy, toxic mindsets that no longer serve you.
Consider adding a goal of continuing something you're already doing, it's a great way to set yourself for a win with your goals.
Make your goals, S.M.A.R.T.
The 3 words, 1 simple phrase, you'll want to add it to every single goal.

Remember, whether you decide to set some resolutions or goals, or not...you deserve to put your healing first in 2019. Anxiety has no place in your life, so make this the year that you take your power back from Anxiety...and empower yourself for a change.

-Matthew Pappas, CLC, MPNLP

All conversation and information exchanged during participation on the Beyond Your Past Podcast, on BeyondYourPast.com, and BeyondYourPastRadio.com is intended for educational and informational purposes only. Nothing on these podcasts or posted on the above mentioned websites are supplements for or supersedes the relationship and direction of your medical or mental health providers.

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If you are..Great, then listen right from the beginning and you'll be all set.

We'll dive into things like:

The worry of not accomplishing goals can stop you from even bother to set any in the first place.
Extreme thinking, an "all or nothing" mindset, and catastrophizing can lead to self-shame with your goals.
Deciding to make resolutions, or goals, is not a one shot deal, you can have as many do-overs you need.
- I share a bit more of using this "do-over" mentality to your advantage, not your detriment.
Being vigilant about imposter syndrome, and old unhealthy, toxic mindsets that no longer serve you.
Consider adding a goal of continuing something you're already doing, it's a great way to set yourself for a win with your goals.
Make your goals, S.M.A.R.T.
The 3 words, 1 simple phrase, you'll want to add it to every single goal.

-Matthew Pappas, CLC, MPNLP

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Previous Episode

Parenting as a Survivor of Childhood Trauma, and Healing Your Past, with Jeremy Schneider, MFT - Ep. 111

My guest on this episode of the podcast, Jeremy Schneider, MFT shares his experience as a survivor of trauma, and his work with individuals and families helped inspire him to write "Fatherhood in 40-minute Snapshots".

Jeremy G. Schneider is a marriage and family therapist whose career spans more than 15 years of working with individuals and families, focusing on parenting, relationships and mental health. For his work, he has been a featured in The New York Times, TODAY, and CNN and has been a speaker on panels in New York, Philadelphia, Dallas, and Liverpool, England. Jeremy lives and works in New York City with his wife, Gem, and his son and daughter, Lucas and Dorit.

During our chat on the podcast, Jeremy and I dive into some aspects of parenting as a survivor of childhood trauma:

At 9 years old, he realized that not only did he have things he needed to work on in his own life due to a traumatic childhood, but that he wanted to be a therapist when he grew up.
During grad school he came to a greater understanding of both himself and his family, and that if he was going to help others he also had to learn how to help himself.
One of the most challenging things about coming to terms with a traumatic childhood is not only, "this is what happened to us and we had to deal with those events as a child", but also now as adults, "we are the ones who have to do the work to heal".
- How facing your past allows you to be much more free than if you continually run from it.
How the trauma he experienced as a child still causes him to struggle at times today, but even with that ongoing struggle the realization that life is so much better now than ever before because he continues to put in the hard work of healing.
- Understanding that just because you will struggle as an adult, doesn't mean that we should just not even bother to try to heal.
He shares about his inspiration for writing "Fatherhood in 40-minute Snapshots" and how the experience of writing has changed him, and his perspective on life and parenting.

My chat with Jeremy Schneider was such a great experience and I'm honored to have the opportunity to share some of his story with you here on the podcast. I hope you'll consider checking out his current book, as well as his memoir due out in mid 2019.

Be sure and follow Jeremy on Twitter and Facebook, and on his website, JGS.net. You can pick up your copy of Fatherhood in 40-minute Snapshots, on Amazon.

-Matthew Pappas, CLC, MPNLP

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Next Episode

Experiencing the Freedom of Trauma Recovery in Your Own Way, with Michele Rosenthal

My guest on this episode of the podcast, the incredible Michele Rosenthal is here to share some of her expertise in the area of PTSD and trauma recovery, including how her journey started and some of the experiences she's had a long the way that have helped to come to a point of being able to not only share her story but work with others to help them facilitate what their healing experience will be.

Michele Rosenthal's story, and her work, has been featured on NBC, CBS, The Washington Post, Women's World, Psychology Today, and many other outlets. She is a Trauma Recovery Strategist who began her healing journey in 1998 and has taken her recovery and made it her own by creating a healing intention and taking control of her life so that she could experience complete freedom.

As she outlines on her website: I learned about the importance of hope and belief – from inside myself and from those working with me. I also learned about the critical elements of self-empowerment, vision, meaning and identity. Plus, how we can harness those core strengths and apply them to healing trauma.

By the time I completed my trauma recovery transformation I’d learned a lot about what it takes to release the past, connect to the present, and build a new future. I’d also developed a really deep desire to do something with all that knowledge. Since then I have made it my focus to inspire, guide and assist survivors to overcome depression, worry, and fear as they rebuild their lives after trauma and adversity.

During my chat with Michele we cover:

4:45 - What does it mean to fully heal from trauma and what does that look like; how do we begin to facilitate that?
10:05 - We discuss the layers that make up Shame and Blame in trauma recovery. How do you get to a point of being able to share our story, and work through the fear that doing so creates. (as you'll hear, fear manifests itself in many ways during this process)
14:45 - We continue chatting about Fear in regards to moving forward in healing. How does fear hold you back? The problems with trying to control healing, so it moves at the pace you feel it should..and why that doesn't always work out. What being obsessed with healing can do to us and for us.
18:28 - Choosing your identity coming out of trauma, and how to continue that development. Creating and mastering the resources you need to sustain the changes you work so hard to implement.
24:40 - What is a Healing Rampage, and what did that look like for Michele. The process of clawing your way through everything that trauma has dumped on you, and giving 100% of yourself to the determination to be free. We also discuss what showing up for yourself means, and how healing is not just a once a week therapy session.We also touch on the benefits and necessity of working with a trauma informed therapist.
31:32 - Michele and I discuss some of the benefits of Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) in healing from trauma and overcoming anxiety. The process of creating new neural pathways using the science of how the brain works. Using the language of the brain and how it works to your benefit to speed up healing and experience empowerment in such a more efficient way that feels natural and good to you as an individual.
38:38 - We wrap up by sharing more about the importance of creating and developing the tools that work for you, to sustain you once you've begun your healing journey and once you begin to reach the goals you've set for yourself, so you can handle what life throws at you and the struggles that will ultimately show up.

Don't just take my word for it though by reading the highlights.... Go ahead click play right here in this post or find us on you

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