What's Up with Bro Hugs?!
12/05/19 • 32 min
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What is a "bro hug"?
Urban Dictionary describes it as follows:
"A manly hug between two dudes who are cool with each other"... Isn't that just a regular hug? Aren't all hugs between people who are cool with each other?
"A manly and heterosexual hug between two bros"... What constitutes a "manly" hug? Can two gay bros not have a bro hug?
"An epic hug between brofriends"... What is a brofriend?? Aren't two males who are friends just simply friends?
Urban Dictionary also goes on to say there are a few ways to mess up a bro hug:
"Not being rigid or forceful enough." "Using both arms to hug (that's gay, bro)." REALLY? "Holding it too long (timing is everything, bro)." I don't know about you, but I love long embraces.
Since when did hugging become a thing that is only okay to do if you're a woman or a gay man? Hugging is one of the most intimate and human things we can do. It's one of the simplest and most meaningful ways to show love, intimacy and affection and to show someone that you're there for them, that you care, that they matter and that they're good enough.
It's not a gender or sexually-oriented thing, it's an every person thing! Hugs have so much power, they have the power to change someone's day, week, month, year or even life.
Join me as I discuss what hugs mean to me, why I love them so much, and how we need to make it okay for two heterosexual men to hug without feeling like they're any less of a man than they are.
To join our community and be part of the conversation:
Behind The Mask-ulinity Private Facebook Group
To connect with me directly:
E-Mail Me: [email protected] or Instagram Me
What is a "bro hug"?
Urban Dictionary describes it as follows:
"A manly hug between two dudes who are cool with each other"... Isn't that just a regular hug? Aren't all hugs between people who are cool with each other?
"A manly and heterosexual hug between two bros"... What constitutes a "manly" hug? Can two gay bros not have a bro hug?
"An epic hug between brofriends"... What is a brofriend?? Aren't two males who are friends just simply friends?
Urban Dictionary also goes on to say there are a few ways to mess up a bro hug:
"Not being rigid or forceful enough." "Using both arms to hug (that's gay, bro)." REALLY? "Holding it too long (timing is everything, bro)." I don't know about you, but I love long embraces.
Since when did hugging become a thing that is only okay to do if you're a woman or a gay man? Hugging is one of the most intimate and human things we can do. It's one of the simplest and most meaningful ways to show love, intimacy and affection and to show someone that you're there for them, that you care, that they matter and that they're good enough.
It's not a gender or sexually-oriented thing, it's an every person thing! Hugs have so much power, they have the power to change someone's day, week, month, year or even life.
Join me as I discuss what hugs mean to me, why I love them so much, and how we need to make it okay for two heterosexual men to hug without feeling like they're any less of a man than they are.
Previous Episode
10 Rules For Being A Man with Zack Henson
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Behind The Mask-ulinity Private Facebook Group
To connect with me directly:
E-Mail Me: [email protected] or Instagram Me
What are some of the rules for being a man?
You have to be the provider, going out and working long hours to provide for your family. You have to be the protector, keeping you and your family safe at all costs even if that means getting physically violent. You don't cry. You don't talk about your feelings. You don't get emotional. You don't wear the color pink. You don't ask for directions. You "man up".
Among many, many others.
While none of these standards of being a man are bad, in and of themselves, they can be damaging when young men are led to believe that this is the ONLY way to be man. They can be damaging when young men are forced to buy into these standards instead of learning how to truly express themselves. They can be damaging when men fear being labeled as "unmanly" if they don't adhere to them hence trying to live up to expectations they will never reach and be someone they never wanted to be.
Forcing anyone, man, woman or child, to be someone they're not while hiding their true selves is one of the most damaging things we can do to them. Forcing someone to live up to the your own standards or the standards of society can cause much heartache and resentment.
Join me in this vulnerably deep conversation with Zack Henson as he shares his own personal rules of being the best man that he can possibly be. These rules aren't meant to be imposed on anyone else through force, they are simply guidelines for Zack that he shares openly in the hopes that maybe it will get other men to shoot perspectives and look at their own lives and expectations a little closer. His 10 rules begin around the 35:00 minute mark.
Zack is an ICF Certified Coach, a fitness competitor, a graphic designer, a podcaster and an ordained minister. He's gone through his own struggles with masculinity and manhood while trying to figure out what exactly it means to be a man and how he can exemplify that every day.
You can connect with Zack directly on his website and check out his podcast as well, both at The Khaos Kreed.
This is a deep conversation you don't want to miss!
Next Episode
Mental Health, Addiction & Physical Touch with Kevin Bergen, MFT
To join our community and be part of the conversation:
Behind The Mask-ulinity Private Facebook Group
To connect with me directly:
E-Mail Me: [email protected] or Instagram Me
MENtal Health. It's a topic that has been on the rise lately, and for very good reason. For us men, it's normal to hit the gym and aim to get those chiseled pecs and washboard abs that we see all these Marvel superheroes have and that ladies love. We go to the gym and see dudes trying to benchpress a sedan, squat a minivan and curl a refrigerator.
But, how many men are willing to put that same effort, sweat, pain and sacrifice into their mental health as well? Not nearly as many.
Mental health, when it comes to men, carries with it a certain stigma. For men, going to a therapist or a coach or seeking any help at all for anything, is seen as a sign of weakness. When we're told from the time we come out of the womb that we have to man up and be tough and never be weak, we can see why so many of us struggle when it comes to opening up and reaching out a hand for help.
Join me as I sit down for a deep and highly crucial conversation with marriage and family therapist Kevin Bergen as we discuss the importance of caring for our mental health just as much as we care for our physical health, because it is that important!
We dive into addiction and how and why it forms in some of us and not in others, and what we can do to combat it. We talk about how important intimacy, affection and physical touch is, especially between men. (No, it doesn't make you gay to be intimate with another man)
Check out Kevin and all the great work he's doing on Instagram, on Linked In and at these websites GuyStuffCenter.com, BergenPhotography.com
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