Bad Planning

I just can't y'all. 30 minutes from now you won't need a description, suck it up.

Hi Matt......................
First of all, fuck you. Second of all welcome to the penultimate episode of OCTOOKY!! In today's episode, Quill and Audrey shoot the spooky shit and talk about everything under the full moon, including gossip, machetes, and punchable offenses. Honestly, it's a great social commentary and you should be so lucky to get advice from flawless queens like us. We have never made a mistake and our faces are distinctly un-punchable.
Cameos include kind of a lot of things:

• the positive correlation between those who don't like horror and those who haven't done inner work #cognitivebehavioraltherapy #ifyoudon'tlikehorrormoviesyoudon'tseeme
• throwing shade at an unnamed ex #matt #hisnameismatt
• the real scary thing about scary movies in a theater being getting shot #america #usa #patriotism
• traumabonding through horror movies <3
• getting caught behind slow walkers in a hot corn maze in california #iwillhackyourachillestendonwithamachete #trywalkingnowbitch
• getting deep into haunted house fantasies #single #touchstarved #bicep
• gossipping being a valid, challenging storytelling exercise
• us boycotting going into the basement in the horror movie
• us being WHET for Haunting of Hill House
• us being FUCKING DRY for Midnight Mass
• a deep analysis of punchable faces #facepunchability #punchableoffense

Anyway...
Matt.........watch your back because I will find you and kill you. You do have a punchable face. Like so bad.
Love,
Bad Planning <3
email us or end up like Matt #knifeemoji

Hi Clarice, welcome to the LAST episode of Season 1 of the Bad Planning Podcast!! What a momentous occasion. Today we truly talk about everything under the sun so we hope you weren’t looking for any discernible plotline.

Cameos include:

• Chrysanthemum Jones and Lavender Puffles
• Us jumping right into Buzzsprout stats with no definition of what Buzzsprout even is
• Us suffering from colossal narcissism
• Anaphase, metaphase, and bananaphase
• Two souls combining in the time-space continuum
• Being offended by getting ghosted while actively ghosting

Bye everyone! We love you and will see you on Groundhog’s Day <3

Hi Tess, today Quill and Audrey are making up for the overwhelming dissatisfaction of the final episode of #2W1C by bringing you an even scarier, devastatingly bleak cross section of the dating pool in today’s network of doomscroll-y realness: dating apps.

There are so many cameos in this episode that there’s a varsity and JV team. Here they are:

Varsity Cameos

• Advice for a 5’8” man who just wants his prostate examined. It’s called having 6ft tall energy, Ryan.
• A man whose entire budget for emotional intelligence is actually tied up in stocks and bonds. Diversify your portfolio, Matt.
• A discourse king who wants you know where he stands on TERFS, SWERFS, and Nazis in Valhalla. #highkeystan
• A a dumb guy who claims to have dumb brain. It’s giving weaponized incompetence. How did you even figure out Tinder then, Andrew?
• Quill almost ragequitting the podcast over a very specific list of Tinder no-nos. Whatever you do, do NOT claim to be a jack of all trades.

JV Cameos (maybe try a little harder to not suck)

• A peek into the NYC gay clubs over halloween, from the perspective of an e-girl, non-Zelda elf
• An accidental, impromptu review of Barbarian. In conclusion: it’s not a hot date horror movie, especially on edibles
• Billie looking kind of delicious in a cooking way. Hey king!
• Hating Arizona and Florida slowly becoming a brand pillar of this podcast. Absolutely couldn’t apologize less. #spf100
• People listening to this podcast and not taking 7 seconds to leave a fucking review, am I right?

Are you into screaming, demon horse meat sacks? Well Gweniffer, you’re in luck! On the second edition of both Two Witches One CauldronTM and Dumb Bitches 101, Quill & Audrey educate each other on some more spooky lore. Love it.
Quill tackles the devil of the sea with a big ol' D, The Nuckelavee, while Audrey revisits the tired, screaming wenches from Ireland’s historic crevices, the Banshees.

Cameos include the Nuckelavee's glistening 6-pack, keening girlies getting PAID, and ad space Audrey’s banshee commercial.

If you have any inquiries about the informational integrity of this episode, please call 1-800-BANSHEE. If you don’t get that this is a joke, then you’re clearly not our target audience. Loser.
We had a lot of sources and about 89% of them were Wikipedia. We are not famous enough to cite our sources so if you have a problem with it, Florida, then leave that fucking review. xoxo