Lieabetes
Explicit content warning
04/03/25 • 40 min
Buckle up, besties—this episode is a ride. 🎢 First up, we need to talk about 1923 and how Spencer is STILL trying to get back to the ranch. Like, sir... we know it’s the early 1900s, but even a homing pigeon would’ve made it by now. 🦅⏳
Then, we dive into the chaos that is Lori Vallow’s latest interview, where she fully doubled down on her delusions. The audacity? Unmatched. The detachment from reality? Astronomical. 🚀🤯
Cort shares some true crime level drama from her own neighborhood, and somehow, she wasn’t the first one to call the cops?! Who even is she anymore?! 🚔😳
We also discuss how a mom’s entire emotional state depends on how well her kids are vibing, while dudes just need their wife to be thriving and they’re good. 🤷♀️ The difference is staggering.
Then, we asked the internet: What’s the weirdest thing someone has ever casually said to you as if it were totally normal? The responses? A masterpiece of unhinged storytelling. 🎭
- A stranger once told Cort her 4-month-old was an Indigo Child. 🧐🔮 Cool cool cool, gonna go Google if we need to start a cult now.
- A guy with a needle in his arm swore he had diabetes and had to inject directly into the vein. Uh, sir... that’s not insulin, that’s LIEABETES. 🚩💉
- Someone PAID to smell a used cast. 🤢💰 Times are tough, but dang.
Oh, and let’s not forget the inspirational moment of the episode, an older colleague of ours just got a tattoo that says "Til’ You Can’t," and honestly, it’s the best motto we’ve heard in a while. (Even if she’s planning on jumping out of planes until gravity tells her otherwise. 😵✈️)
And finally, those lifestyle coaches who claim they can turn 24 hours into three days? What is this, Hogwarts? 🎩✨ Des and Cort could NEVER be coach girlies. We don’t take orders, we barely take suggestions. 💁♀️
All this and so much more—so grab your earbuds, your beverage of choice, and prepare to feel better about your own life choices. 😂🎧
#lieabetes #whatintheactual #spencerpleasegethome #momlife #wecallbs #podcastchaos #adventuresofdesandcort
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Buckle up, besties—this episode is a ride. 🎢 First up, we need to talk about 1923 and how Spencer is STILL trying to get back to the ranch. Like, sir... we know it’s the early 1900s, but even a homing pigeon would’ve made it by now. 🦅⏳
Then, we dive into the chaos that is Lori Vallow’s latest interview, where she fully doubled down on her delusions. The audacity? Unmatched. The detachment from reality? Astronomical. 🚀🤯
Cort shares some true crime level drama from her own neighborhood, and somehow, she wasn’t the first one to call the cops?! Who even is she anymore?! 🚔😳
We also discuss how a mom’s entire emotional state depends on how well her kids are vibing, while dudes just need their wife to be thriving and they’re good. 🤷♀️ The difference is staggering.
Then, we asked the internet: What’s the weirdest thing someone has ever casually said to you as if it were totally normal? The responses? A masterpiece of unhinged storytelling. 🎭
- A stranger once told Cort her 4-month-old was an Indigo Child. 🧐🔮 Cool cool cool, gonna go Google if we need to start a cult now.
- A guy with a needle in his arm swore he had diabetes and had to inject directly into the vein. Uh, sir... that’s not insulin, that’s LIEABETES. 🚩💉
- Someone PAID to smell a used cast. 🤢💰 Times are tough, but dang.
Oh, and let’s not forget the inspirational moment of the episode, an older colleague of ours just got a tattoo that says "Til’ You Can’t," and honestly, it’s the best motto we’ve heard in a while. (Even if she’s planning on jumping out of planes until gravity tells her otherwise. 😵✈️)
And finally, those lifestyle coaches who claim they can turn 24 hours into three days? What is this, Hogwarts? 🎩✨ Des and Cort could NEVER be coach girlies. We don’t take orders, we barely take suggestions. 💁♀️
All this and so much more—so grab your earbuds, your beverage of choice, and prepare to feel better about your own life choices. 😂🎧
#lieabetes #whatintheactual #spencerpleasegethome #momlife #wecallbs #podcastchaos #adventuresofdesandcort
We can't grow without your support! Do us a solid and leave a review!
Don't forget to follow and share!
Instagram: @adventures_of_des_and_cort
TikTok: @adventuresofdesandcort
Previous Episode
Yikes!
🚨 YIKES! 🚨The only word that truly captures this week’s absolute mess.
First up: battling insurance for the 4th time like it’s the Hunger Games except instead of a bow and arrow, we have a 3-hour hold time and a slowly dying will to live. 🎯📞🙃
Then, being exposed by the kids because they repeat things we probably shouldn’t have said to them. Who knew that your mom tells you she will “Donkey Punch” you wasn’t appropriate to mention to a Vice Principal?🤷♀️
We’re also launching a campaign to bring yikes back, because sometimes it’s the only response. Like Des’s algorithm serving her a lady who heals people via video (are our backs supposed to feel better or is it a scam?) and a man proudly declaring his new alpha move is... not wiping.🚽💀 Adn these people have so many followers! MAKE IT MAKE SENSE.
Meanwhile, Cort keeps Des’s algorithm feral by sending the most unhinged reels. Oh, and we have a new talent: panicking so hard we try plugging the female end of a cord into the wall. 🔌🤦♀️
And SO MUCH MORE. Buckle up. 🎧🍸
#yikes #sendhelp #whatislife #girlmath #podcastchaos #unhinged #adventuresofdesandcort
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Next Episode
Old Man Energy
Old Man Energy has officially entered the chat... and it’s wearing readers 👓, yelling “HUHHH?” at full volume, and making sure we stretch before walking briskly 🧍♀️➡️🧍♀️💨.
We’re recapping our Bingo event 🎉 (shoutout to all the Besties that showed up 💕), plus another event where Des won a prize 🏆 but immediately went into full panic mode at the idea of attention 😳. She tried to pawn the prize off on Cort (❌ denied), then smoothly talked our boss into claiming it 🫣.
Meanwhile, Cort discovered she has full-blown Grandpa Energy🧓... couldn’t hear anything 🔊❌, told Des to “just claim the prize already,” and was dropping “huh?!” every 5 minutes like it was her job 🤷♀️.
We had digital dinosaur moments🦕: calling over a random teen thinking it was Des’s son (it was not 🙈), and wrestling with a photo booth like it required a NASA login 🚀📸.
We also learned:
Des had a full-on 4th grade crush on her bus driver 🚌 and swears he was singing Toni Braxton 🎶 just for her.
Cort has never done a full cartwheel 🤸♀️ and has no plans to start now. At this age, cartwheels require prep, prayers 🙏, and a chiropractor on speed dial ☎️.
Plug in, press play ▶️, and join us for the chaos. It’s giving joint pain, awkward moments, and nostalgic crushes 🦴💘.
So grab your heating pad🔥, turn up the volume📢, and come laugh with us until it hurts (in a good way) 😂.
#oldmanenergy #tonibraxtonfantasy #digitaldinos #podcaslaughs #adventuresofdesandcort #bestiesocialclub #jointpainandpunchlines
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