Adventures of Des and Cort

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Get ready for It’s a Bop! 🎶 In this episode, we dive into the real hot topics: election drama and the surprising bops that came from Trump soundbites (who knew?!), why weight seems to bounce back faster than we can recover from the flu, and dudes hitting new lows with their thirst traps. 👀 Des recounts a manic shopping spree that somehow ended in a new car (it’s a mood, okay?), and Cort’s tales from parents weekend at University of Idaho remind us why parents and college campuses are a wild mix (yes, she felt her age.) 😂 Add in our collective rant on aggressive drivers, and you’ve got an episode that’s a true jam! 🎧

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Buckle up, besties—this episode is a ride. 🎢 First up, we need to talk about 1923 and how Spencer is STILL trying to get back to the ranch. Like, sir... we know it’s the early 1900s, but even a homing pigeon would’ve made it by now. 🦅⏳

Then, we dive into the chaos that is Lori Vallow’s latest interview, where she fully doubled down on her delusions. The audacity? Unmatched. The detachment from reality? Astronomical. 🚀🤯

Cort shares some true crime level drama from her own neighborhood, and somehow, she wasn’t the first one to call the cops?! Who even is she anymore?! 🚔😳

We also discuss how a mom’s entire emotional state depends on how well her kids are vibing, while dudes just need their wife to be thriving and they’re good. 🤷‍♀️ The difference is staggering.

Then, we asked the internet: What’s the weirdest thing someone has ever casually said to you as if it were totally normal? The responses? A masterpiece of unhinged storytelling. 🎭

• A stranger once told Cort her 4-month-old was an Indigo Child. 🧐🔮 Cool cool cool, gonna go Google if we need to start a cult now.
• A guy with a needle in his arm swore he had diabetes and had to inject directly into the vein. Uh, sir... that’s not insulin, that’s LIEABETES. 🚩💉
• Someone PAID to smell a used cast. 🤢💰 Times are tough, but dang.

Oh, and let’s not forget the inspirational moment of the episode, an older colleague of ours just got a tattoo that says "Til’ You Can’t," and honestly, it’s the best motto we’ve heard in a while. (Even if she’s planning on jumping out of planes until gravity tells her otherwise. 😵✈️)

And finally, those lifestyle coaches who claim they can turn 24 hours into three days? What is this, Hogwarts? 🎩✨ Des and Cort could NEVER be coach girlies. We don’t take orders, we barely take suggestions. 💁‍♀️

All this and so much more—so grab your earbuds, your beverage of choice, and prepare to feel better about your own life choices. 😂🎧

#lieabetes #whatintheactual #spencerpleasegethome #momlife #wecallbs #podcastchaos #adventuresofdesandcort

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Buckle up, b*tches...this week’s episode is a wild ride through salty confessions, defiant energy, and our refusal to be compliant with... well, pretty much anything. Salty, Defiant, and Extremely Noncompliant is exactly what you'd expect from us...chaotic, hilarious, and slightly concerning.
🔥 Hot Flash Alert: Dating in your 30s, 40s, and 50s sounds like an extreme sport, and based on our single friends' horror stories... we’re glad we’re not playing.
🥂 FUPAs & Fizz: That time we snuck mini champagne bottles into the movie theater by strategically placing them where no one questions a little extra fluff. TSA could never.
🐈 Cort’s Energy Shift: Once a golden retriever, now full-on cat mode...aloof, selectively social, and only affectionate on her own terms. Des called it, and we have no choice but to agree.
🌞 New Year, Who Dis? We’re throwing out the January start date...let’s embrace the astrological new year in March, when the sun actually shines and motivation isn’t buried under 12 layers of seasonal depression.
🎬 First Jobs, Big Yikes: Cort’s teenage self was out here renting out adult films and dishing unsolicited advice at the local porn shop (trauma? maybe.). Meanwhile, Des was at McDonald’s, touching fryers, ignoring coupons, and just generally doing whatever the hell she wanted. Corporate queen.
💨 To Fart or Not to Fart? A shocking investigation into whether we’re the type of couples that *let it rip* in front of our men or hold it in until our intestines scream. Spoiler: Cort’s living free, Des is holding on for dear life.
All this and more unhinged nonsense that probably shouldn’t be recorded but definitely is. Hit play, you won’t regret it. 🤭🎧

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This week, we handed over the mic to none other than Dee—Des’s mom, the headbutt queen, and unofficial boss of everything. 💁‍♀️ From hilarious stories of Des growing up, to Dee’s first impression of Cortnie, this episode is equal parts roast and toast. 🔥🍞

We’re talking:

Dee’s unique punishment methods (spoiler: headbutts were involved) 🤕

What we’re thankful for this year (besides wine, obviously) 🍷

A sprinkle of Thanksgiving 🦃

And, of course, life advice from Dee, because Mama always knows best💡

Whether you’re peeling potatoes or hiding from your family this holiday season, tune in for laughs, wisdom, and a whole lotta sass. 👏

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In this episode of Adventures of Des and Cort, we’re unwrapping a whole lot of laughs (and life lessons). 🎙️ First up, we’re diving into the hero complex—because some dudes just can’t resist swooping in like they’re auditioning for a Marvel movie. 🦸‍♂️

Next, we’re dropping some serious wisdom: Don’t judge a piece of candy by its wrapper. 🍬 You never know what sweet (or sour) surprises lie beneath the surface! And since we’re rocking the empty nest life, we’ve taken up some new hobbies like guitar, dance, and—naturally—golf. Who says you can’t teach old dogs new tricks? 🎸💃⛳️

Meanwhile, we’re sending out thoughts and prayers to the astronauts stuck in space, and wondering if Raygun, the Olympic break dancer, could moonwalk them back to Earth. 🕺🚀 Plus, we’re talking Olympic canoeing—because nothing says "high stakes" like paddling for gold. 🛶

And let’s not forget that heart-stopping moment when you think you’ve lost something important. Cue the panic! 😱

Get ready for an episode packed with humor, insight, and the kind of girlfriend chats that feel like home. 🎉 #AdventuresOfDesAndCort #HeroComplex #CandyWisdom #EmptyNestHobbies #OlympicCanoeing #LostAndFoundPanic

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Hope you liked it!

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