Too Smart For This

Welcome back to TSFT ladies! Today we're diving into the popular concept of LUCKY GIRL SYNDROME!
2:00 Feeling “lucky” even without wealth
3:13 What does Lucky Girl Syndrome (LGS) look like?
3:33 Using LGS as a means of introducing positive thinking into your life
3:57 If you believe you’re lucky, you will be
4:12 Manifestation is imperative
7:13 Using vision boards and The Law of Assumption to create your own luck
9:14 Altering your mindset to mirror what you’re trying to manifest/attract
11:19 The more positive energy you throw into the universe, the more positive energy it gives you back
12:48 Setbacks can bring about new and positive possibilities
14:06 Everything works out in the way it’s supposed to
14:50 #1 Create the subconscious belief that you’re a lucky person
14:54 #2 Utilize the Law of Attraction to manifest your dream life
15:05 #3 Trust the process – everything is happening FOR you, not TO you
15:26 Utilizing daily affirmations to ground yourself
15:58 You are your greatest asset – start each day by checking in and reminding yourself what you want
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With March coming to an end, it’s time to check in on how much progress you’ve made in your professional/personal goals! In today’s solo episode, Alexis dives into the strategies that allow her to both reflect on the past quarter, and make the most of the next.
Show Notes:
1:09 Planning goals in quarters allows you a flexibility that annual plans don’t offer
1:30 Think of each season as a quarter
2:25 Personal Q1 recap
3:27 Comparison is the thief of joy
3:45 Perfection is paralyzing
5:05 Ask yourself questions, check in with yourself, rather than being self-critical
5:55 Reframe your shortcomings – they aren’t setbacks but valuable information
6:11 Grant yourself grace
6:54 “Spring Reset” should come from a place of positivity rather than negativity
8:04 5 Steps to ensure a successful Spring Reset
8:06 #1 Spring cleaning; decluttering
9:22 Prioritize when it comes to cleaning out your closet
10:43 Reflect on these past few months: What went well? What didn’t?
11:38 #2 Intentionally journal: How are you feeling now? How have you been feeling? How do you want to feel in the future?
12:00 Acting vs feeling – how to go about cultivating the emotions you want
12:34 #3 Set minimum, viable goals that you’re more likely to accomplish
13:02 The world is not happening TO you, you create your own destiny
13:57 Spring as a time for “good enough” goals
16:36 #4 Create a quarterly vision board
18:01 #5 Social media detox – mute, unfollow, remove what doesn’t benefit you
22:06 PR product giveaway!
Shop Too Collective with discount code PODCAST15 here: toocollective.com
Subscribe to our Newsletter & Get Daily Affirmation Texts: toocollective.norby.live
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This show is part of the Spreaker Prime Network, if you are interested in advertising on this podcast, contact us at https://www.spreaker.com/show/5806440/advertisement
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This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit alexisbarber.substack.com/subscribe

They say going to grad school in your 20s is a cop-out. Maybe it is: the shield of academic prestige has certainly been a comfort, but today I can say that the whirlwind of personal growth my master’s degree has prompted has left me with no choice but to surrender. Yeah, it’s that bad, but that’s (unfortunately for my nervous system, fortunately for the stories my home friends get to hear) ultimately, good.

The year my frontal lobe developed I was in business school, surrounded by people largely my senior. I’ve met exactly 3 people younger than me and even then, only by weeks. I’ve faced friendship breakups, racial confrontations, career crises, an election and political unrest at a school and in a city central to massive political debates, and I entertained every type of toxic situationship you could imagine. I give thanks to God alone for getting me through this because, girl. Why???

Ok, welllll....I guess I asked for it! Becoming single for the first time in the midst of jumping into a brand new social scene full of overachievers, confronting my biggest academic insecurity (that I was bad at math: NOW PROVEN FALSE!!!), and thinking I could run two businesses while I learned what business really was-ok like let’s be very serious-WAY too tall of an order, even for the delusional.

The thing is, even though 25 was insane, I was comforted by the lessons from year 24, when I learned to stop settling and to say no to the things that weren’t serving me. In addition to ending my relationship, removed my birth control against the advice of my doctors, prompting a bodily transformation that has been critical to my mental and physical health. I left my (literally cannot express enough how great it was) amazing job at YouTube to pursue my own dreams and further my education.

In each realm of my life, I saw what I needed, and I stopped pretending I didn’t need it. I don’t know why, but I guess the frustration with being under-satisfied was so great that it prompted my welcoming of the unknown. Could the labels and the “you should be grateful”s really be fulfillment? Could I survive without feeling disconnected to my body, unchallenged in my job, or unseen in a relationship?

25 was the year to answer those questions.

Yes. I could. And I did.

Professionally and socially, at least, I thrived. I got a book deal, worked with dream brands, grew my social following, and travelled to several countries. I flirted, partied, and failed almost hourly. It was an awe-inspiring year full of fabulous outfits (you already know) and utter social chaos (one day I’ll share the tea - it could be an HBO series so I might save it for that!)

At 25 I lived. I really lived. I had successes. I made mistakes. I built a new bond with myself I didn’t know was possible. And I learned probably more than I ever have.

And in today’s episode, I’m sharing what I learned into 7 key lessons. Real ones, you’ve probably heard a bunch of them on the show over the last few months, but today I’m really distilling it.

I hope that by hearing me go through this, you’re either comforted that you aren’t alone, or somehow more prepared via perspective for when you encounter these battles on your own journey. It’s a process, and I’m just going through it with you.

It was my birthday last Saturday, and I felt more grateful for life than I ever have. Nothing was perfect, except I could see the good in everything, even the bad.

26, for me, will be about feeling gratitude and fully recieving the love and abundance that’s all around. It’s sooooo easy to latch on to pessimism. And I’ve been there - until somewhere along the line (at 24) I saw that it wasn’t good enough, and I loved myself enough to want more.

I love myself enough now to believe I deserve more. And today’s podcast dives into why.

Preorder the Too Smart For This Journal: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/761193/too-smart-for-this-by-alexis-barber/ Get custom embroidered robes for a perfect holiday gift: https://toocollective.com/collections/all/products/too-classic-robe Subscribe to the Too Smart For This Substack: https://alexisbarber.substack.com/ Shop Too Collective: https://toocollective.com/ Follow Too Collective on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/toocollecti... Follow Alexis on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alexisbarbe... Follow Alexis on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@alexisbarber_...

This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit alexisbarber.substack.com/subscribe

It’s 2023 baddies, and we’re kicking off the year with a confidence-building series from the girls who simply GET IT. If you’re in need of a reminder that being you isn’t just good enough, its all you’ve got, today’s episode with Unikue will get you there. Alexis and Uniekue jump into their shared experience of always being seen as “intimidating,” going to predominately white Boarding schools, and how they’ve taken control of their narrative with TikTok. Uniekue shares how to grow on TikTok by being yourself, and teases upcoming projects. To keep up with Unikue, check out: Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@uniekue?lang=en Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/uniekue/?hl=en YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@uniekue Shop Too Collective with discount code PODCAST15 here: toocollective.com Get daily affirmation texts that remind you you’re THAT GIRL: toocollective.norby.live Subscribe to our Newsletter: toocollective.norby.live Follow Too Collective on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/toocollective/?hl=en Follow Alexis on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alexisbarber/?hl=en Follow Alexis on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@alexisbarber_?lang=en Subscribe to Alexis on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC7-YnRrflV9g6nLMWUkwDtA
This show is part of the Spreaker Prime Network, if you are interested in advertising on this podcast, contact us at https://www.spreaker.com/show/5806440/advertisement
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This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit alexisbarber.substack.com/subscribe

“Girl Gangs” have long been a staple of the female experience – a way for women to lean on each other as we navigate life, love, and everything in between. Unfortunately, creating and maintaining these strong friendships can be difficult post-grad, as the demands of adulthood can crowd our vision. If you’re in need of some tips and advice on cultivating bonds with women that’ll last a lifetime, this week’s episode of Too Smart for This is for you!
Show Notes:
3:46 Why are female friendships important?
3:53 There’s a lived experience that only other women will understand
4:50 Importance of nurturing female friendships in a world that prioritizes romantic love
5:00 Why are female friends hard to make and maintain?
5:08 Patriarchy encourages competition between women
6:40 Recognizing and unlearning a patriarchal mindset
7:09 Personal experience with female friends
8:10 Struggling to find belonging/security in homogenous environments
9:31 Navigating self-segregated environments in Academia
11:34 Being your most authentic self is the foundation for any relationship
11:57 Avoid people who project their insecurities onto you
12:12 Strong, lasting relationships require vulnerability
13:01 Finding comfort in self-awareness
13:48 Authenticity and confidence create the foundation for great female friendships
14:12 Viewing interpersonal relationships as a reflection of ourselves
17:28 Taking each friend at face value – always assuming the best intentions
18:16 Analyze your feelings/emotions in the presence of certain friends
19:11 Set expectations with new friends
20:40 Categorizing friends
22:26 How to make friends after college
22:40 #1 Connect with people through your network
23:12 #2 Bumble BFF
23:19 #3 Join clubs/activities that fit your interest
25:04 Everything you’ve ever wanted is on the other side of fear!
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This show is part of the Spreaker Prime Network, if you are interested in advertising on this podcast, contact us at https://www.spreaker.com/show/5806440/advertisement
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
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This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit alexisbarber.substack.com/subscribe