Things Musicians Don't Talk About

Becca catches up with her former teacher, Paul Denegri, from his stay in an old farmhouse. The humblest of the humble, Paul takes us through his journey to where he is now: revisiting his unexpected appointment as Head of Brass at Wells Cathedral School; his feelings of imposter syndrome and disillusionment with the freelance musician lifestyle; and staying true to his identity. Paul's trademark openness and warmth is so refreshing in the world of classical music and music education, where prestige and resilience is so often touted as the pinnacle of success.

Thank you Paul for being the reason a lot of us from Wells fostered our passion for music and have ended up where we are now.

Paul's website: paul denegri

Paul on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pauldenegripandonltd/

Paul's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pauldenegri/

Click here for transcript

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Things Musicians Don't Talk About is now generously supported by the Royal Society of Musicians!

The Royal Society of Musicians is Britain’s oldest music charity and our aims remain as relevant today as they were in the earliest years – to provide vital financial assistance, advice and guidance to those professionally active in the world of music but who are unable to work due to accident, illness, stress or anxiety. Being a charity run by musicians for musicians, we are uniquely placed to fully understand the challenges faced within the profession.

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Editor: Rebecca Toal

Music: Katy Ehrlich

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This episode we are sharing the space with BBC Radio 3 presenter and flautist, Hannah French. Recorded in a North London office space, we listened as Hannah explained to us her journey to a diagnosis of Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, a collagen deficiency which affects the soft tissue and has impacted her ability to walk, play the flute and live life as she once knew it. She took us through the reality of living with EDS, and the process of moving away from flute performance and into her current job as a presenter at BBC Radio 3. We talked about the power that radio now has in her life, creating a space to tell stories and shape a listeners' experience and the process of creating the amazing documentary for Radio 3, The Silence of My Pain in 2020.

Thank you to Hannah for her honesty about her pain experience and for your wonderful presence and infectious humour!

Hannah's documentary, The Silence of My Pain, will be played again this Friday, 9th September on BBC Radio 3 at 10pm

Click here for transcripts

Wanna jump around? Timestamps:

0:00: Intro

2:25: Welcome to Hannah

4:00 What is EDS?

8:00: Discovering Hannah's EDS and playing the flute

14:25: Moving into academia and research

15:35: Accommodating people with disabilities in music

19:00: Acceptance of disability and illness

20:15: Pastoral welfare of students; working at the Royal Academy of Music as a lecturer and tutor

23:30: Loss of identity as a flautist

26:00: Moving into radio and working for the BBC

28:18: The liberation of radio

29:15: Does Hannah feel envious when presenting/watching performances?

31:45: The psychological impact of pain

36:30: Managing difficult emotions, anxiety and coping mechanisms

39:00: Working with and not against pain

41:50: Making the documentary, The Silence of My Pain

45:30: The importance of silence in Hannah's life

46:45: Fascination and flow

53:22: Unapologetic visibility

55:15: Starting conversations about pain and disability

56:35: Removing shame and presenting an honest depiction of pain

1:01:30: Wins of the week!

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Welcome back! Today Hattie and Rebecca speak with concert pianist Clare Hammond about her experience with generalised anxiety disorder, post-natal depression and how these experiences have lead Clare to performances in schools and prisons. They speak about managing a mental illness as a musician, how it might feel to inhabit a prolonged period of darkness, how and whether to communicate struggle with audiences and Clare's work within prisons.
Find Clare's article for Classical Music UK about music in prisons here
Find Changing Tunes for music in prisons here
Clare's website

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More about Clare
Acclaimed as a “pianist of extraordinary gifts” (Gramophone) and “immense power” (The Times), Clare Hammond is recognised for the virtuosity and authority of her performances. In 2016, she won the Royal Philharmonic Society's 'Young Artist Award' in recognition of outstanding achievement and in 2020 she was engaged to perform at the International Piano Series (Southbank Centre).

Performances during the pandemic included recitals for the Wigmore Hall and Aldeburgh Music, a live recital broadcast for BBC Radio 3 Lunchtime Concerts from St David’s Cardiff, and broadcast recordings of Moussa and Carwithen with the BBC Symphony Orchestra (Geoffrey Paterson) and BBC Concert Orchestra (Gavin Sutherland). During 2020-21, Clare was engaged to perform with the Britten Sinfonia (Ryan Wigglesworth), Sinfonia Varsovia (Jacek Kaspszyk), Royal Philharmonic Orchestra (Christoph Altstaedt) and the BBC Symphony Orchestra (Dalia Stasevska). In recent seasons, she has performed with the Royal Liverpool Philharmonic Orchestra (Vasily Petrenko), Warsaw Philharmonic Orchestra (Jacek Kaspszyk), and Philharmonia (Jamie Phillips).

Clare gave the world premiere of Uncoiling The River by Kenneth Hesketh with the BBC National Orchestra of Wales (Martyn Brabbins) and released the Complete Keyboard Works of Myslivecek with the Swedish Chamber Orchestra (Nicholas McGegan) for BIS Records in 2019. Clare’s discs for BIS have been widely praised with her latest, Variations, receiving extensive critical approval. The disc was commended for its “shimmering pianism and lightly-worn virtuosity” (BBC Music Magazine) and “artistry of the highest order” (Musical Opinion), while Crescendo (Belgium) hailed her as “one of the most exploratory pianistic personalities of our time”. Clare’s discography includes world premiere recordings of over twenty works.

Clare completed a BA at Cambridge University, where she obtained a double first in music, and undertook postgraduate study with Ronan O’Hora at the Guildhall School of Music & Drama.

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Today is all things Chineke!, Steiner education, mental health and branching out of classical music into other projects/genres!

Hattie chats to violinist Raye Harvey about her life and education. Delving into the subtle ways in which subtle racial discrimination has been transformed by the work of the Chineke! Orchestra, Raye talks about becoming involved with Europe's majority-Black and ethnically diverse orchestra and how transformational that has been. Raye speaks openly about her mental health, expressing why few musicians emerge from conservatoire unscathed. She speaks about how she sought professional support, including CBT in the past few years and about her experience with seasonal affective disorder.

More about Raye:

Raye Harvey is a Manchester based violinist and singer-songwriter who completed her undergraduate degree at the RNCM and is currently finishing a PGCEi with Music Masters. Coming from a large Indian-Caribbean family, Raye loves travel, collaboration and working in many different genres. As well as teaching, she performs extensively as an orchestral and session musician, including with the Ignition Orchestra, on the Brand New Heavies newest album and internationally with the Chineke! Orchestra. Raye is passionate about making music accessible for all and increasing diversity in Classical music. She also recently released her debut self-titled EP “Lakshmi”, and was made BBC Introducing Hereford and Worcester’s Artist of the Week.

Follow Raye!

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Raye's personal instagram

Lakshmi's instagram

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Entering our YouTube era...! And we're talking about returning to things we didn't expect to: Hattie to America and Becca to the harp.

We also have a good ol' think about child prodigies, faith and praying, and Becca obsesses further about JULY.

We've got some absolutely stellar interviews lined up for release, so stay tuned.

Thank you to forScore for advertising with us and to the Royal Society of Musicians for their ongoing support 🙏

forScore: https://forscore.co

Things Musicians Don't Talk About is supported by the Royal Society of Musicians! Follow RSM on Instagram, X and Facebook.

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Support TMDTA

Want to support us on a regular basis? Consider joining our Patreon from £1 a month: https://www.patreon.com/tmdta

Feeling generous? Help us raise funds for the podcast: https://www.gofundme.com/f/v9jgf-things-musicians-dont-talk-about

Find TMDTA on all the socials at @tmdtapodcast

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Hosts: Hattie Butterworth & Rebecca Toal

Editor: Rebecca Toal

Music: Katy Ehrlich

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.