Ascension Island’s tortoise troubles, Omonia’s fan-paid groceries & Lazio’s live-in falconer

01/21/25 • 53 min

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There’s an island theme in Part 1. Starting with the return of football to Ascension Island, an isolated outpost in the Atlantic Ocean. It will be the second-most remote place to host football in the world – but what is the first?! Next up is Malta, where the only team in the pyramid from the neighbouring island of Gozo has made a 100% start to the season and the top flight has adopted a Latin American-style format. Our final stop in this segment is Cyprus, where Omonia Nicosia are preparing to face their breakaway rivals Omonia 29M.

Part 2 contains a selection of great stories from across the European continent. There are shocks in France and Portugal as top-flight teams are dumped out of the cup by amateur opponents. Lazio have sacked their falconer for posting inappropriate pictures online, but he is reportedly refusing to leave their Formello training ground – where he has lived for the past 15 years! And finally, the bizarre tale of North Korea’s short-lived friendly against Kosovan club SC Gjilani – and perhaps the craziest pre-match graphic that has ever been made!

Check out our new Patreon, which will go live on 1 February 2025

Listen to Cypriot football podcast 'This is Mappa'

RUNNING ORDER:

00:00 – Intro

01:21 – Ascension Island’s tortoise troubles

11:00 – Gozitans off to flying start in Malta

18:01 – Omonia Nicosia’s breakaway rivals

28:17 – Amateur cupsets across the continent

35:45 – The bizarre tale of Lazio’s falconer

41:03 – North Korea’s short-lived friendly

49:39 – The Sweeper's revamped Patreon

Editor: Ralph Foster

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Check out our new Patreon, which will go live on 1 February 2025

Listen to Cypriot football podcast 'This is Mappa'

RUNNING ORDER:

00:00 – Intro

01:21 – Ascension Island’s tortoise troubles

11:00 – Gozitans off to flying start in Malta

18:01 – Omonia Nicosia’s breakaway rivals

28:17 – Amateur cupsets across the continent

35:45 – The bizarre tale of Lazio’s falconer

41:03 – North Korea’s short-lived friendly

49:39 – The Sweeper's revamped Patreon

Editor: Ralph Foster

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Previous Episode

Balzers’ Internet fame, the world’s newest league & The Strongest’s Chocolate Party

This episode is brought to you in association with FIFA+. Click here to get your free FIFA+ account and watch live football around the world: ⁠www.tinyurl.com/FIFAPlusSweeper⁠

The Sweeper is back for the first episode of 2025 to round up all the world football headlines from over the Christmas and New Year period. Starting in Europe, where Balzers of Liechtenstein have gone from 1,000 to 400,000 Instagram followers almost overnight – but how have they achieved their stratospheric growth? In Portugal, Nacional’s Madeiran mist has wrought havoc yet again and Oliveirense have used milk to mark the goal-lines in the absence of paint. Finally, in Italy, we take a deep dive into the wonderful world of Serie C.

In the rest of the world, there are teething problems for the world’s newest top-flight league in the world’s newest country: South Sudan. In Bolivia, national giants The Strongest have resorted to an unusual measure to raise money for children in San Pedro prison in La Paz and the relegation/promotion play-off has come to the most dramatic of conclusions. And there’s a similar story over in Indonesia, where controversy reigns supreme after PSM Makassar missed the memo that the 12th man is supposed to be the fans and fielded an extra player.

For a bonus episode on Wednesday 15 January and plenty of other extra content, join us on Patreon at patreon.com/SweeperPod.

RUNNING ORDER

00:00 – Intro

02:02 – Balzers’ instant Internet fame

07:02 – Cult clubs and countries

08:54 – Madeiran mist & mainland milk

15:40 – The wonderful world of Serie C

25:55 – A Chocolate Party and a play-off

31:45 – Favourite sounding football fixtures

36:07 – The newest league on the planet

44:42 – A 12th man – but not the fans

Editor: Ralph Foster

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Next Episode

Ferencváros' ultras in disguise, HamKam 2’s AI coach & Burkina Faso’s bus-funded leaders

1 Recommendations

This episode is brought to you in association with FIFA+. Click here to get your free FIFA+ account and watch live football around the world: ⁠www.tinyurl.com/FIFAPlusSweeper

Part 1 is all about the final round of Europa League and Champions League action. How have Brest made the play-offs with an inexperienced coach and a shoestring budget? What does Fenerbahce boss José Mourinho have against the Danish town of Herning? Does Ryan Kent love his pet crocodiles more than his own family? How did the Ferencváros ultras disguise themselves for the visit of AZ Alkmaar? And what bold move did the German TV channel RTL+ make for Eintracht Frankfurt’s clash with Roma?

Part 2 is dedicated to artificial intelligence and transport. What happened when the HamKam reserves appointed an AI coach on a one-game basis? How is Iceland’s Football Manager tactician getting on at Vesturbæjar? What happens when you ask Chat GPT to script a Sweeper episode about football in space/Narnia? And how have a club funded by a former player’s bus company shot to the top of the table in Burkina Faso? For bonus episodes and heaps of extra content, check out our Patreon page at patreon.com/SweeperPod.

RUNNING ORDER:

00:00 – Intro

00:31 – Overachieving outsiders

07:33 – Church bells & crocodiles

13:14 – Jostles & jungles

17:26 – Blunders & backstroke

23:27 – HamKam 2’s AI coach

28:12 – KV’s Football Manager tactician

29:37 – Football in space & Narnia

35:26 – Rahimo FC’s bus-funded title tilt

Editor: Ralph Foster

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.