The Stuck Stops Here

According to an open, quantitative online research study conducted by the authors for our book, The Fatherless Daughter Project: Understanding Our Losses and Reclaiming Our Lives (Avery, June, 2016), out of approximately 2,000 female respondents between the ages of approximately 15 and 80, of diverse backgrounds, 50% of females identified as fatherless. These women cited a range of reasons that they became fatherless, including parents’ divorce or separation (28%), emotional absence (26%), death (19%), desertion (13%), addiction (13%), abuse (12%), never having met their father (6%) and incarceration (4%). As I evolved into a young adult, these repressed emotions rose to the surface. This lack of understanding of my current emotional reaction to fear of abandonment -- became an over-reaction to everything -- and I always felt guilty, isolated, misunderstood, and out of control. This is where the obvious divide comes for women who have experienced father loss. Life experiences can be post-traumatic triggers that unearth pain hidden since she was a child. Often faced with assuming responsibility at a young age, she grows up more quickly than her peers and develops qualities of self-reliance, leadership and perseverance. The flip side of these positive attributes is that the fatherless daughter can take on far too much herself. Because of taking care of my mother, I developed the tendency to carry burdens for others. I become over-stressed and psychologically taxed. While I developed powerful coping mechanisms, I always put myself last, leading to isolation, loneliness and depression.
Article- How growing up without a dad affects women
Article - What it's like to be a fatherless daughter
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For years (actually decades!) Carol didn’t know what she wanted to do. She had been working in the corporate world for over 20 years, most recently in a leadership role at a Fortune 5 company.
Although she worked hard and was consistently recognized and promoted, she somehow knew that she was meant to do something different. she felt stuck in a life that didn’t fit.
In early 2018, she left her corporate job and made the leap into the unknown. After doing months of intense inner work with her coach, Michael Sandler, and reconnecting to her higher wisdom, she discovered that she could combine her life and business experience with her soul-aligned interests. She knew she had a talent for building thriving, productive teams and helping people to see their unique strengths and gifts, but it took a while for her Soul-aligned purpose to emerge
She became the creator and Co-founder of The Divine Breadcrumb, a global online community and podcast, which showcases amazing people shining their light around the world. She started writing a blog to share her own story. These are things she couldn’t have imagined a few years ago. But as often is the case, the Universe had an even bigger plan for her than she had for herself.

She is now a certified Inspire Nation coach, focusing on awareness, empowerment & transition. She helps her clients to clear old patterns & beliefs, connect to their heart intelligence, re-wire the mind and discover meaning and purpose. It’s when we do this inner work that we can move forward towards our goals with confidence.
Her Soul knew what she would be doing long before she did, and she is grateful that she followed the Divine map that was laid out before her.
She loves traveling, exploring new cultures, being in nature and helping people on their own paths. She holds a B.A. in Communications from Hofstra University. She lives in Massachusetts with her rambunctious and hilarious rescue cats, Petey and Emmett.

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Part of my healing journey is fulfilling a recently discovered life purpose by reaching out to those in need of healing from emotional abuse by toxic parents and transgenerational dysfunction. If you are sheltering in place, perhaps some of you would like to use this time of no distractions to acquire new healing strategies. If you are like how I used to be...a chaotic emotional fire fighter addicted to busyness and outcomes...this quiet time may feel like torture. If you are craving an emotionally healthier life and experiencing a spiritual awakening y...I truly hope these mini-podcasts resonate. I try to cover a lot of ground in a direct way so you can heal in place and fill your still. Today I want to talk about Toxic Family Systems. A family system is like a game of pool. When you shoot the cue ball into the balls it scatters them in different directions but they all don’t scatter the same way. Think about your ancestors and your family history. What kind of environment were your parents raised in? Are you able to see why they developed unhealthy behaviors and perhaps personality disorders? Does recognizing toxic family patterns help you to have compassion for them and for you? I didn’t say forgive. I said compassion...meaning empathize with them in order to reduce your own anger. If you have more awareness, that may lead to less hostility – towards yourself and them.

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