21. Embracing life post-separation: the power of radical acceptance

02/22/24 • 27 min

Emerging from the fog of separation, I found myself anchored by an unexpected philosophy: radical acceptance.
This episode peels back the layers of this transformative practice, revealing how acknowledging our painful realities can liberate us from the energy spent on the impossible task of changing others—especially a former partner.
As we navigate through Marsha Linehan's ten steps of radical acceptance, I share insights on how to discern what is within our power to change, and what we must learn to accept. This is not about approving of the situation, but rather recognising it for what it is, thus allowing us to channel our efforts toward healing and personal growth.
But acceptance is just the beginning. By practicing radical acceptance, we not only come to terms with the things we cannot change, but also find the courage to rebuild our sense of self and embrace the joy of life post-separation - with each step towards acceptance, we're actually stepping into a world of newfound empowerment and joy.

I'm a specialist Separation, Divorce & Co-Parenting Coach based in Melbourne, Australia.
I support women to strategically navigate ongoing control and other forms of abuse after separation, and to optimise their outcome for themselves and their children.
Part of my specialist coaching includes helping women to optimise their court outcomes, particularly parenting arrangements. If you are navigating the court system with a controlling former partner, or suspect that you might in the future, I can help.

To learn more about what I do, and how to work with me, visit:
https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au
For more information about post-separation abuse: https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au/thank-you
For more information about separation planning (including a checklist):
https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au/separationplanning
Follow me on Instagram: @danielleblackcoaching
MORE SUPPORT (within Australia):
1800RESPECT: 1800 737 732

Lifeline: 13 11 14

13 YARN on 13 92 76 (24/7 crisis support phone line for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples)

Lifeline: 13 11 14

13 YARN on 13 92 76 (24/7 crisis support phone line for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples)

Previous Episode

20. Empty promises: the abusers go-to lie to maintain control

The latest episode peels back the curtain on the raw and heartfelt journey to reclaim autonomy and safety for those entangled in a web of control and broken promises.
In this episode I confront the painful truth that abusers rarely change without significant self-work.
As a survivor and advocate, I understand all to well what you are dealing with when you are trying to decide whether to stay or go and I've become intimately familiar with the need to craft a careful and strategic plan when considering separation from a controlling partner.
The episode extends an invitation for a free discovery call with me for personalised guidance. This is more than just a discussion; it's an invitation to begin a transformative journey, supported every step of the way.

Lifeline: 13 11 14

13 YARN on 13 92 76 (24/7 crisis support phone line for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples)

Next Episode

22. Firm foundations after separation: the importance of emotion regulation

When you're caught in the throes of divorce and tasked with co-parenting, emotions can run high—especially when communication with an ex feels like navigating a minefield. This episode is a heartfelt guide to managing those complex feelings and finding peace amidst chaos. I open up about my own struggles and breakthroughs, sharing the strategies that have helped me maintain emotional balance, whether it's through journaling or a therapeutic session of EMDR.
Facing your ex in a co-parenting dialogue can be daunting, and for some, the urge to retreat is palpable. During this episode, I tackle why avoidance can sabotage not just personal healing but also the practicalities of legal matters.
Lastly, I take you on a journey through the landscape of 'felt safety.'
Understanding how our perceptions can trigger a stress response even in the absence of real danger is crucial for anyone who's experienced control or abuse in a relationship. This episode doesn't just offer a perspective; it aims to be a companion in the search for improved emotional wellbeing and healthier relationships.

Lifeline: 13 11 14

13 YARN on 13 92 76 (24/7 crisis support phone line for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples)

The Post-Separation Abuse Podcast - 21. Embracing life post-separation: the power of radical acceptance

Transcript

Speaker 100:00:34.902

Hello and welcome to another episode of the post-separation abuse podcast . I'd just like to take a moment before we dive into today's topic to say thank you to all of the people who have been rating and reviewing the podcast , and also for my current clients , who have had a lot of positive things to say about the podcast and who are tuning in regularly and even inspiring some