The Mel Robbins Podcast - The “Let Them Theory”: A Life Changing Mindset Hack That 15 Million People Can’t Stop Talking About

The “Let Them Theory”: A Life Changing Mindset Hack That 15 Million People Can’t Stop Talking About

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05/29/23 • 46 min

8 Listeners

The Mel Robbins Podcast

I shared the "Let Them Theory" on social media, and it went CRAZY VIRAL. 15 million views, 11,000 comments. Today, it’s your turn to learn this mindset trick.

I’ve been using this technique for a while, so I know firsthand how powerful it is.

The "Let Them Theory" is so simple, you’re going to get it immediately.

And I have some great stories and examples to share with you, because there are three very different ways you can use it.

I can bottom line this in one sentence:

When you "Let Them" do whatever it is that they want to do, it creates more control and emotional peace for you and a better relationship with the people in your life.

Xo Mel

In this episode, you’ll learn:

2:30: My overfunctioning anxiety kicked in, until this happened.
6:30: Dr. Amy Johnson gives the best metaphor that explains our need to control.
9:20: Why do we get so upset about what we can’t do a damn thing about?
10:30: These three reasons explain why we try to control.
11:20: Two reasons why your parents and partners are so controlling.
17:00: There are times like these when the “Let Them” rule does NOT apply.
19:00: How are you supposed to let go when you’re a parent?
24:30: Can you relate to this listener who’s worn down from her expectations?
28:00: Stop making up stories about why people do what they do, and just ask.
32:10: When you’re constantly rescuing people, here’s what you teach them.
35:00: Are you actually in a relationship with a real person, or a vision?
37:15: One way we try to control someone is through jealousy.
40:00: Growing apart from a good friend? Here’s how to handle it.
43:30: It’s not your responsibility to make sure everyone else is never hurt.

Disclaimer

I shared the "Let Them Theory" on social media, and it went CRAZY VIRAL. 15 million views, 11,000 comments. Today, it’s your turn to learn this mindset trick.

I’ve been using this technique for a while, so I know firsthand how powerful it is.

The "Let Them Theory" is so simple, you’re going to get it immediately.

And I have some great stories and examples to share with you, because there are three very different ways you can use it.

I can bottom line this in one sentence:

When you "Let Them" do whatever it is that they want to do, it creates more control and emotional peace for you and a better relationship with the people in your life.

Xo Mel

In this episode, you’ll learn:

2:30: My overfunctioning anxiety kicked in, until this happened.
6:30: Dr. Amy Johnson gives the best metaphor that explains our need to control.
9:20: Why do we get so upset about what we can’t do a damn thing about?
10:30: These three reasons explain why we try to control.
11:20: Two reasons why your parents and partners are so controlling.
17:00: There are times like these when the “Let Them” rule does NOT apply.
19:00: How are you supposed to let go when you’re a parent?
24:30: Can you relate to this listener who’s worn down from her expectations?
28:00: Stop making up stories about why people do what they do, and just ask.
32:10: When you’re constantly rescuing people, here’s what you teach them.
35:00: Are you actually in a relationship with a real person, or a vision?
37:15: One way we try to control someone is through jealousy.
40:00: Growing apart from a good friend? Here’s how to handle it.
43:30: It’s not your responsibility to make sure everyone else is never hurt.

Disclaimer

Previous Episode

6 Signs You’re Disconnected From Your Power and How to Get It Back: Life-Changing Advice From the Remarkable Dr. Thema Bryant

If you feel that something’s missing from your life but have no idea exactly what’s missing or where to begin looking for it, today’s episode will help you reconnect with your power and find greater meaning in your life.

Dr. Thema Bryant is the current president of the American Psychological Association. She trained at both Duke and Harvard, published multiple best-selling books, and has dedicated decades of her life to researching how we connect with each other by first connecting back to ourselves.

Her work has been so profound for me personally that, right off the bat in this conversation, I get emotional.

Dr. Thema is a national treasure. Her presence and her voice will put you at ease. And she has the unique gift of weaving together psychological strategies for healing with the deeper spiritual cornerstones of faith and trusting in "that which cannot be explained."

In this episode, you’ll learn:

-6 signs that you are disconnected from yourself

-what it means to be "psychologically wandering"

-how to handle people in your life who are chronically irritable and angry

-the surprising signs of "irritable depression"

-the three words to say to yourself before you can begin healing

-why self-care is critical if you are in a toxic workplace (you are more than your labor)

-why you need to stop talking about your significant other and your boss in therapy.

-where to find therapy when you can’t afford it.

You are so much more than a highway for other people to get where they’re going. With Dr. Thema’s wisdom and tactics, you’ll reconnect with yourself and take the wheel on your own incredible journey in life.

Xo Mel

In this episode, you’ll learn:

2:45: I got really emotional when I acknowledged how my life used to be.
6:30: 6 powerful signs that you are disconnected from yourself and what that means.
9:00: Even if you’ve never felt home with yourself, you can learn to be home with yourself.
11:00: The West African fable that gave me chills and should be required reading for everyone.
16:00: This is the first and most powerful step to your “homecoming.”
22:00: Do people with an attitude actually have depression?
25:20: What is healing, anyway?
27:00: How do we handle people in our lives who are irritable, frustrated, and angry?
30:00: It’s a big mistake if you wait for this before you start your own healing.
36:30: How to know if you need therapy or you need spirituality.
41:00: How do you heal from a lifetime of messaging that you’re not worthy?
44:00: This is how you handle working in a toxic work environment.
48:50: Look to these resources if you can’t afford therapy.

Disclaimer

Next Episode

3 Steps To Finding Your North Star: An Exciting New Approach To Designing Your Life

Welcome to an exciting new masterclass on designing the life of your dreams.

First, you’ll learn the process for identifying your own North Star, why this is important at the beginning of creating your new life, and how to use your North Star to guide you in the process of designing your life.

Next, you’ll dive deep into the 3-part framework: Emulate, Assimilate, and Innovate.

This framework is the backbone of the University of Southern California’s world-renowned Popular Music major taught at their Thornton School of Music.

It’s the creative process artists use to create songs, movies, and video games. The framework has helped launch Grammy-winning artists and touring musicians for the past decade.

I just learned about it a week ago and was so blown away that I had to share it with you.

When an artist creates a song, they begin with a blank piece of paper.

When you design your life, you are an artist with a blank canvas.

Today, you’re invited to tap into the artist within and learn how to find your North Star and use the creative process to bring your vision for your future to life.

Xo Mel

In this episode, you’ll learn:

3:00: Hear me describe the woman who recently became MY North Star.
6:40: Choosing this kind of person you want to choose as your North Star is best.
8:00: Shout out to Chris Sampson from the Thornton School of Music for these pillars.
10:15: If you skip Step One in this process, you’re making your life much harder.
14:15: Here’s how Jennifer Aniston made her way into our conversation.
18:10: We start unpacking what Step One of the process looks like, first with music.
21:00: Think of the space in between where you are and want to be as special.
22:15: Try using “want” instead of “need” when it comes to goals and see what happens.
25:20: This is what I did when I first started to dig myself out, but it took me much longer.
28:00: Here’s why this person is my North Star and why he puts a fire in my belly.
31:15: Let’s define the first two steps in this important process and how they’re different.
34:00: How do you know when you’re done and you’ve become your own North Star?
41:45: Kendall’s biggest takeaway from working through this process.
42:45: The way I sign out on all my podcasts was inspired by this woman.

Disclaimer