The Anxious Love Coach

If you've ever experienced dread around making love due to the "ick," pain, anxiety, shame, or being too tired, this episode is for you! I'm excited to introduce a dear friend and mentor of mine, who is also a trained Tao Tantric Priestess, Integrative Nutrition Coach, and Yoga Teacher. Her name is Shayna Hiller. In this episode, we will discuss the causes of dread around sex, as well as what you can do to start looking forward to sex especially if it's gotten stale in the bedroom. You're not alone; No, you're not broken, and no, you're not necessarily with the wrong partner if you're not feeling turned on by their mere presence!

Register for the Sex Anxiety Clinic: https://www.anxiouslovecoach.com/sexanxietyclinic

To apply for Shayna's retreat and/or training: www.embodiedwisdomretreat.com or Shayna's website www.shaynahiller.com

Next ALC Patreon community call: Saturday, March 2nd at 9am PST/12pm EST: www.patreon.com/anxiouslovecoach.com

Who we are:

Natalie Kennedy @Anxiouslovecoach

Shayna Hiller @Shaynahiller

Time Stamps:

6:52 Shayna’s long-term celibacy in her twenties

12:43 Clearing sexual trauma through the tantric arts

19:51 Inspiring your partner to be their best selves

26:34 Deciding that you don’t like sex, when the reality is that you dislike the sex you are having

30:21 How stress leads to anxiety in the bedroom

37:10 Normalizing the ebbs and flows in your relationship and your sex life

38:30 Scheduling sex

46:15 What to do when you dread having sex with your healthy, loving partner

1:05:00 Sex Anxiety Masterclass on March 14th 2pm PST

1:11:12 You are wired for pleasure

1:14:43 Shayna’s Embodied Wisdom Retreat

Two things are true: 1) I am unqualified to speak on ERP and OCD and 2) I am sharing my thoughts about ERP for those that still want to hear them even though I am unqualified.

What is ERP (Exposure & Response Prevention)? How helpful is it for those with relationship anxiety? What are its strengths and limitations? In this episode, I'll share my thoughts on this treatment.

Join me for Both Feet In - Abridged: https://www.anxiouslovecoach.com/both-feet-in-abridged

If you need immediate support, write me a Wisio. I'll make you a 7-10 minute custom video response. Here: https://wisio.com/anxiouslovecoach

We will be bumping up to 2 calls a month on Patreon when we hit 250 patrons — one for Q&A and one for meditation practice! Our next call is Sunday, February 11th at 8am PST/11am EST.

https://patreon.com/anxiouslovecoach

Who we are: Natalie Kennedy @Anxiouslovecoach

Time Stamps:

5:04 What is ERP (exposure response therapy)?

9:34 The dangers of disassociating

13:00 What is polarity work?

20:00 Compassionate self-inquiry

In the past I've touched on this as an incompatibility, but as usual — I think it's more nuanced than that, and there are a few things you might do to try to get on the same page before you either hang up your desires or call it quits.

Both Feet In Self-study only: FLASH SALE UNTIL 8/31 - 5 days left! Register here

Upgrade to join the next BFI class series (6 week group) - Claim your spot here

Next Patreon community call: September 13th at 9am PST - Become a patron here for $5-9/month to get access to Q&As with me monthly, exclusive posts, be part of intimate group discussions, get discounts, and get first access to things. Cancel anytime.

Today's episode was unscripted, and I shared some hard thoughts and feelings I've been having about the podcast, and where I'd like to take this podcast moving forward. I also shared some perspective shifts women in relationships with men could make, that would enable them to have more harmony with the good men in their lives. I have a workshop coming up next Sunday called Yin Language: a 2-hour dissection for women on how to communicate with men in ways they understand. Sorry I waited to the last minute to tell you. I've been feeling hesitant to speak about it on the podcast lately and I shared why in this episode. You can join 125+ women for the workshop, and the recording will be sent out to all registrants afterwards whether you attended live or not. Register for Yin Language here. Other mentions: Next Patreon community call December 14th 9am PST - click here to join Btw Wisio (my "pick my brain" service) is hosting a sale. Ask me anything and get 10% off using the code "THANKS24" Amazon book list with Queen's Code

Books mentioned in this episode:

The Queen's Code by Alison Armstrong

The Empowered Wife by Laura Doyle

Magnetic Femininity by Ali Douzet

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Are you feeling an intense urge to break up right before Thanksgiving or winter break? You're not alone. It's actually very common! In this episode, I outline some common reasons behind holiday break-up urges and what you can do instead.

Patreon: patreon.com/anxiouslovecoach

Get a personalized video response: wisio.com/anxiouslovecoach

Email me to get on the waiting list for early bird BFI rate at [email protected]

Who we are: Natalie Kennedy @Anxiouslovecoach

Time Stamps:

3:00 Breaking up and coming back to my partner during the holidays

7:40 How the holidays can bring up difficult feelings about your relationship

13:00 Wanting control over your life

19:40 What to do when you have breakup urges during the holidays

28:04 Earlybird discount for the upcoming Both Feet In coaching program