Sex Ed with DB: smart, science-backed sex education - Where did "virginity" come from?

Where did "virginity" come from?

Explicit content warning

02/21/25 • 12 min

Sex Ed with DB: smart, science-backed sex education

It’s a concept we all grew up with, and it’s certainly shaped the way Hollywood tells stories about sex, but have you ever stopped to ask where the idea of virginity even came from? In this bonus episode, DB breaks down the history of virginity as a social construct, how it’s been used to control women, and why the hymen was never a reliable “proof” of anything.

What would sex look and feel like if it wasn’t about losing something? Let’s rethink the way we talk about first-time sex!

Mentioned in this episode:

"The 40 Year Old Virgin": The Bro Comedy That Hates Women

Planned Parenthood on Virginity

CONNECT WITH US Instagram: @sexedwithdbpodcast TikTok: @sexedwithdbTwitter: @sexedwithdb Threads: @sexedwithdbpodcast YouTube: Sex Ed with DB

ROM-COM VOM SEASON 11 SPONSORS: Lion's Den, Uberlube, Magic Wand, & Arya. Get discounts on all of DB’s favorite things here!

GET IN TOUCH Email: [email protected]Subscribe to our newsletter for behind-the-scenes content and answers to your sexual health questions!

FOR SEXUAL HEALTH PROFESSIONALS Check out DB's workshop: "Building A Profitable Online Sexual Health Brand"

ABOUT THE SHOW Sex Ed with DB is your go-to podcast for smart, science-backed sex education—delivering trusted insights from top experts on sex, sexuality, and pleasure. Empowering, inclusive, and grounded in real science, it’s the sex ed you’ve always wanted.

SEASON 11 TEAM Creator, Host & Executive Producer: Danielle Bezalel (DB) Producer: Sadie Lidji Communications Lead: Cathren Cohen Logo Design: Evie Plumb (@cliterallythebest)

What would sex look and feel like if it wasn’t about losing something? Let’s rethink the way we talk about first-time sex!

Mentioned in this episode:

"The 40 Year Old Virgin": The Bro Comedy That Hates Women

Planned Parenthood on Virginity

CONNECT WITH US Instagram: @sexedwithdbpodcast TikTok: @sexedwithdbTwitter: @sexedwithdb Threads: @sexedwithdbpodcast YouTube: Sex Ed with DB

ROM-COM VOM SEASON 11 SPONSORS: Lion's Den, Uberlube, Magic Wand, & Arya. Get discounts on all of DB’s favorite things here!

GET IN TOUCH Email: [email protected]Subscribe to our newsletter for behind-the-scenes content and answers to your sexual health questions!

FOR SEXUAL HEALTH PROFESSIONALS Check out DB's workshop: "Building A Profitable Online Sexual Health Brand"

SEASON 11 TEAM Creator, Host & Executive Producer: Danielle Bezalel (DB) Producer: Sadie Lidji Communications Lead: Cathren Cohen Logo Design: Evie Plumb (@cliterallythebest)

Previous Episode

"The 40 Year Old Virgin": The Bro Comedy That Hates Women

The 40-Year-Old Virgin launched a comedy empire—but does it still hold up, or is it best left in the mid-2000s? From outdated jokes to cringeworthy gender politics, this Judd Apatow classic has a lot to answer for.

This week, comedian and Bechdel Cast co-host Caitlin Durante joins DB to break down its virginity-obsessed premise, the way it treats female pleasure as a punchline, and why so many early 2000s comedies leaned on casual misogyny and homophobia for laughs.

GUEST DETAILSCaitlin Durante is a comedian, writer, and co-host of The Bechdel Cast, a podcast that examines movies through an intersectional feminist lens. You can follow me on Instagram at @caitlindurante and check out caitlindurante.com

CONNECT WITH US Instagram: @sexedwithdbpodcast TikTok: @sexedwithdbTwitter: @sexedwithdb Threads: @sexedwithdbpodcast YouTube: Sex Ed with DB

ROM-COM VOM SEASON 11 SPONSORS: Lion's Den, Uberlube, Magic Wand, & Arya. Get discounts on all of DB’s favorite things here!

GET IN TOUCH Email: [email protected]Subscribe to our newsletter for behind-the-scenes content and answers to your sexual health questions!

FOR SEXUAL HEALTH PROFESSIONALS Check out DB's workshop: "Building A Profitable Online Sexual Health Brand"

SEASON 11 TEAM Creator, Host & Executive Producer: Danielle Bezalel (DB) Producer: Sadie Lidji Communications Lead: Cathren Cohen Logo Design: Evie Plumb (@cliterallythebest)

Next Episode

"The Wedding Planner": Girlbossing, Gaslighting, and Groom-Stealing" (Rom-Com Vom)

J.Lo and Matthew McConaughey star in one of the most early 2000s rom-coms of all time, complete with a near-death meet-cute and a love triangle that ignores all workplace ethics. But is The Wedding Planner actually romantic...? Or just a lesson in emotional cheating?

This week, comedian Liza Treyger joins DB to unpack the film’s messy gender politics, its weird obsession with wedding culture, and why Steve might be one of rom-com history’s most gaslight-y love interests.

GUEST DETAILS Named one of Variety’s “Top Ten Comics to Watch,” and a comic who 'shines where sex and politics intersect’ by The New York Times, Liza’s first ever hour-long comedy special entitled “Night Owl” is heading to Netflix and will drop globally on January 28, 2025. It comes on the heels of “Glittercheese,” a half-hour she taped for Comedy Central, as well as a half-hour she put together for Netflix’s stand-up collection “The Degenerates.” A true multi-hyphenate, in addition to working in film and television, Liza hosts the successful podcast That’s Messed Up: An SUV podcast (Exactly Right Media) which averages over half a million monthly downloads.

CONNECT WITH US Instagram: @sexedwithdbpodcast TikTok: @sexedwithdbTwitter: @sexedwithdb Threads: @sexedwithdbpodcast YouTube: Sex Ed with DB

ROM-COM VOM SEASON 11 SPONSORS: Lion's Den, Uberlube, Magic Wand, & Arya. Get discounts on all of DB’s favorite things here!

GET IN TOUCH Email: [email protected]Subscribe to our newsletter for behind-the-scenes content and answers to your sexual health questions!

FOR SEXUAL HEALTH PROFESSIONALS Check out DB's workshop: "Building A Profitable Online Sexual Health Brand"

SEASON 11 TEAM Creator, Host & Executive Producer: Danielle Bezalel (DB) Producer: Sadie Lidji Communications Lead: Cathren Cohen Logo Design: Evie Plumb (@cliterallythebest)