Sex, Drugs, and Jesus

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INTRODUCTION:

You have not one but two beautiful chocolate men in this episode! My guest today is J. Maceo and he is one half of the duo that hosts the starlit podcast: A Cosmic Journey With Demi And J along with the ever fabulous Demi Wylde. J is an accomplished singer-songwriter and ex-preacher based in Los Angeles California -my favorite city. J has lived a full life and from that life he has plenty of spiritual and metaphysical insight that can help you out along your journey. In this episode we get an impromptu live music performance from J as he sings to us while he strums his guitar. J has a sound that is somehow both new and nostalgic and in a single song he’ll take you from the Texas church pews of his youth with gospel buzzing in the air to the inner recesses of his heart, twisting like California canyons and thick with true tales of breakups and breakthroughs. There isn’t anything more I need to say here. I enjoyed the fuck out of this interview and I hope you do to!

INCLUDED IN THIS EPISODE (But not limited to):

· Live music performance from J. Maceo!

· Addiction and Sobriety

· Trauma Bonding

· Running Meditation Explanation

· Hypnotherapy

· Baptist Bullshit

· Gratitude

· A Positive Affirmation I Learned From Louise Hay

· J’s Five C’s to Help You Raise Your Vibration:

Consciousness

Conversation

Company

Carry

Creativity

CONNECT WITH J:

Website - https://linktr.ee/J.Maceo

Podcast - https://www.acosmicjourneypod.com/

FaceBook - https://www.facebook.com/J.MaceoMusic/

Twitter – https://twitter.com/j_maceomusic

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/j.maceomusic/

Music on Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/artist/2n8UGW8EvO0wxiwqseTu1D

Music on Apple - https://music.apple.com/us/artist/j-maceo/1532580255

TRANSCRIPT:

[00:00:00] You're listening to the sex drugs and Jesus podcast, where we discuss whatever the fuck we want to. And yes, we can put sex and drugs and Jesus all in the same bed and still be all right. At the end of the day, my name is Davanon and I'll be interviewing guests from every corner of this world. As we dig into topics that are too risky for the morning show, as we strive to help you understand what's really going on in your.

[00:00:24] There was nothing on the table and we've got a lot to talk about. So let's dive right into this episode.

[00:00:34]

[00:00:34] De'Vannon: All right, Jay, thank you so much for coming on this X drags and Jesus' podcast today, we show sexy chocolate. So it's so much fun. Is he another, um, ball black man, or they, um, say it in one of my favorite movies? White chicks.

[00:00:56] J. Maceo: Well, it's funny you say that because what I was thinking of, I was [00:01:00] looking at everything you'r

Thanks for listening!!! Please follow us on YouTube + TikTok @SexDrugsAndJesusPodcast

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Unsleeving Self-Inflicted Harm and How to Solve It, with Michelle Mitchell

You may be familiar with the term self-harm, but what does it really mean? Is it strictly physical or does it include self destructive thoughts too? Is it something that happens on a regular basis or something spontaneous? In polite company, we shy away from discussing self-harm because we feel like it’s too sensitive, or not politically correct.

If we can’t even talk about self-harm, how could we possibly help a friend or loved one who’s struggling with it?

Today, we’re tackling the taboo topic of self-harm head on. Our guest is the marvelous Michelle Mitchell, founder of the youth harm prevention charity Youth Excel, where she helps young folks go from self-destructive to self-confident. She’s also a bestselling author, speaker and educator, to name a few of her amazing accomplishments studying the subject of self-harm.

In this episode, you’ll gain a better understanding of what self-harm really is, how to spot it, and how to prevent it. Because we could all use a little intervention from time to time. Ready to get schooled on the significant topic of self-harm? You’ve come to the right place.

Self-Harm Explained

Before we could get into remedies for self-harm, I wanted to get to the bottom of its causes. What in the world drives someone to hurt themselves? Michelle clarifies that the self-harm we typically see is different than a suicide attempt.

Instead, it’s a stress response. Like picking up a glass of whisky or reaching for a cigarette after a tough day, it’s a common coping response when emotions are flying high. We all gotta find a way to deal with life’s bullshit, and for some, self-harm is a quick fix.

Though many of us consider self-harm to be physical damage to the body, Michelle clarifies that self-harm can include any kind of self destructive behavior: unsafe sex, binge-drinking, even spreading hate speech on social media. These behaviors offer a rousing jolt of adrenaline followed by numbness or intense shame.

These negative feelings bring the self-harmer lower, leading to a cycle of more self-harm to cope with more discomfort.

Also In this episode, I explain how habitual self-harm is not unlike being addicted to certain drugs. The high is euphoria, and the low is painful beyond belief. Even though you think you’ll only do it once or one more time, you find yourself seeking out the exact thing that made you feel so bad the day before–and the cycle continues.

Michelle reminds us that self-harm is not a diagnosable mental health disorder, but is often tied to disorders like depression or anxiety. Like other mental health issues, childhood trauma can make someone more susceptible to developing a self-harm problem. Self-harm is also more prevalent for those in the LGBTQ+ community.

I get it. I repressed my sexuality after being told by my church that I would burn in Hell for not being straight. It’s not hard to understand why so many gay youths want to cope with rejection and turn to self-harm as a solution

So What Can We Do About it?

If you’re worried that someone in your life is committing self-harm, Michelle says there are some surefire ways to spot it. Unexplained body marks and long sleeves that are rarely removed are serious signs that self-harm could be going on. Michelle says if someone is constantly doing laundry, they might be really focused on having clean clothes....or they may be trying to hide self-harm evidence, like blo

Thanks for listening!!! Please follow us on YouTube + TikTok @SexDrugsAndJesusPodcast

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When Passionate Parenting Isn’t Enough, with Paul Podolsky

When Paul Podolsky and his wife adopted an infant girl, Sonya, from Russia, they expected to have an innocent, loving child on their hands. Like any excited parents, they poured lots of affection onto their new kid, with the intent to help her grow up happy, healthy, and well adjusted. Everything seemed perfect.

But signs that things were awry quickly began to appear. Sonya wouldn’t drink any liquids put in front of her, and would then gorge herself sick with food. When they got her into preschool, she began strategically waiting for nap time and then stealing from all the other kids. Then she started exposing herself to strangers and defecating in public places.

As she got older, the lying and misbehaving got worse and worse. She became extremely manipulative, pitting Paul and his wife, Marina, against each other. She even hid her brother’s inhaler, putting his life at risk.

How did she become so inclined towards chaos? That’s the subject of Paul’s book: Raising a Thief, and the central topic of this interview.

How Do Parents End up Raising a Criminal?

The answer lies in early childhood. In Sonya’s case, her birth mother severely neglected her, letting her cry all day with very little food or attention. Authorities eventually took Sonya away from her home after the neighbors called the police, but she endured this parental abuse for the first few months of her life.

In our interview, Paul informs me that going through an experience like Sonya’s so early in development has some very intense effects on the brain. Sonya’s mind was fundamentally reprogrammed, making her believe she was threatened by primary caretakers, and that to survive, she had to assert her control in every situation. That’s what her bad behavior boiled down to. By breaking all the rules, she demonstrated that she could control them––not the other way around.

So what did Paul and his wife do? Try to be the perfect parents. They’d both undergone trauma in their own youths. Marina’s father was an alcoholic, and Paul’s mother had died from cancer when he was very young. They didn’t want Sonya to experience a similar situation as they did, growing up without treating the lasting effects of trauma until adulthood. They poured in every resource: emotional, physical, financial, spiritual...but nothing helped Sonya heal.

They checked her in and out of rehabilitation for years and although it felt like failure, Paul has learned that there was nothing more he could have done. In the episode Paul details how in life, there are some things you can’t control. In this case, he had to let go and hope professionals could help Sonya better than he could. Although there were periods of improvement, her temperament grew worse over time.

Thanks to professional intervention and her own self journey, Sonya started to come around. Paul recounts seeing her post a fundraiser on social media to help reduce child hunger, and he donated, prompting a phone call from her the next day to catch up. A day later, she called Marina too. I wouldn’t call Sonya’s relationship with her adoptive parents perfect, but they have had meaningful, positive interactions since she left home.

There are plenty of people out there with similar problems as Sonya, to various degrees. To help put them at ease, Paul decided to write and publish Raising a Thief. His goal is to help parents who are in a similar situation and feel frustrated, worn out, or confused. He’s been able to work with families from all over the world to

Thanks for listening!!! Please follow us on YouTube + TikTok @SexDrugsAndJesusPodcast

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Street Smarts from Veteran Los Angeles Prosecutor, Jonathan Cristall, Esq.

Most of the skills we know about life don’t come from the classroom! No one in a typical high school teaches us how to fight off online predators, or reason with a police officer who’s harassing us in the street. If we want to learn how to survive in the “real” world, we often have to teach ourselves through trial and error.

Our guest today is a father of three who worried about what might happen if his kids weren’t taught life lessons about consent or the dangers of social media. He sat down and wrote a long list of all the topics he felt he needed to teach his kids outside of the academic sphere... and then went ahead and published it. His name is Jonathan Cristall, a City of Los Angeles prosecutor, and his book is called What They Don’t Teach Teens: Life Safety Skills For Teens and the Adults Who Care for Them.

Jonathan and I both know what happens when you learn your lessons the hard way. He was arrested in his teenage years, I was arrested in my twenties. Jonathan for nonviolent property offense, me for possession of meth. And we know we’re not alone, because 1 in 3 Americans are arrested in their lifetimes. Another person is put in cuffs every three seconds. There are about as many people with arrest records as there are with college degrees in the U.S! Not to mention, people of color are much more likely to be unjustly targeted by law enforcement.

With such overwhelming statistics about the American criminal justice system, we all need to know how to talk to cops. Unfortunately, Jonathan noticed that most people don’t know their basic rights when dealing with police officers. He explains the implications of this concern thoroughly in his book, and today’s episode.

Critical Insight: How To Talk with Police Officers

One significant fact most people are unaware of is their right to refuse a search. If officers have a search warrant or have probable cause due to the situation at hand, they can lawfully search without your consent. Otherwise, you have to agree...and often they get you to agree by asking you veiled questions like: “Do you have anything in your pockets I should worry about?” or “Why don't you let me see your phone?” No matter what, you don’t have to answer these questions or consent to these searches.

You might be asking yourself: won’t invoking these rights make cops more suspicious? Maybe, but it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t know that denying consent is an option. Even if cops are rough with you on the street, knowing your rights will help you defend yourself when the court date rolls around. Exasperated, overworked cops tend to be rough in the moment, so Jonathan recommends not putting up a fight with an officer in the street. Without being rude, you can peacefully exercise your right to silence and to refuse search. Later, you can hold a police officer accountable for their actions in front of a judge.

Use Your Rights for Good, not Evil

If you know your rights, Jonathan warns they should only be used for good. In our interview, Jonathan shares an example of a young man who committed sexual assault–and filmed it. Then he sent it to his friend. When the police asked to search the friend’s phone, he refused, on the bias of an unlawful search. By protecting his friend, he kept justice from being served. When invoking your rights, Jonathan insists on focusing on doing the right thing, not withholding important evidence as that may prevent someone dangerous from being brought to justice.

Life Skills, Smarts, and Sex

Thanks for listening!!! Please follow us on YouTube + TikTok @SexDrugsAndJesusPodcast

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INTRODUCTION:

Heather Hutchison is the Amazon best-selling author of Holding On by Letting Go: A Memoir, and an award-winning singer/songwriter with three albums released to date.

Blind since birth and having struggled with mental illness from a young age, she is passionate about educating people on disability and mental health through her music and writing. Heather is a frequent guest on national television and radio programs and renowned podcasts across the globe to share her message of hope to those who are struggling. In her advocacy work, she has appeared alongside numerous high-profile psychologists, clinical counsellors and other mental health professionals.

An avid traveler, she has spent time living and teaching English in Latin America. Heather lives on the west coast of Canada with her partner Jordan and their cat Maya. When she isn’t writing, playing music or traveling, she can usually be found at the beach, or curled up with a good book and a chai latte.

INCLUDED IN THIS EPISODE (But not limited to):

· Living Life With Blindness and Mental Health Struggles

· Misconceptions About Blind People

· How People Can Teach Us To Dislike Ourselves

· Wrestling With Suicidal Thinking

· Life Inside Of Psychiatric Wards

· A Lesson On Spiritual Understanding

· The Healing Found In Music & Writing

· Why Blood Is NOT Thicker Than Water

· Getting Over Addiction To Family

CONNECT WITH HEATHER:

Website, Books & Music: https://www.heather-hutchison.com/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/HHutchisonMusic

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/heatherhutchisonmusic

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/heatherhutchisonmusic/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/hlhutchison

DE’VANNON’S RECOMMENDATIONS:

· Pray Away Documentary (NETFLIX)

o https://www.netflix.com/title/81040370

o TRAILER: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tk_CqGVfxEs

o

TRANSCRIPT:

[00:00:00]

You're listening to the sex drugs and Jesus podcast, where we discuss whatever the fuck we want to. And yes, we can put sex and drugs and Jesus all in the same bed and still be all right. At the end of the day, my name is De'Vannon and I'll be interviewing guests from every corner of this world. As we dig into topics that are too risqué for the morning show, as we strive to help you understand what's really going on in your.

There is nothing off the table and we've got a lot to talk about. So let's dive right into this episode.

De'Vannon:

Thanks for listening!!! Please follow us on YouTube + TikTok @SexDrugsAndJesusPodcast