"Let's Talk Shit About Coming Out"
10/21/21 • 48 min
In this episode you'll hear the personal coming out stories from Dale and co-host Aiyana, and the difficulties they faced when making the decision to share their honesty. Dale grew up going to a conversion therapist after his birth family suspected he was gay after being molested from the ages of 3-15. He discusses the difficulty that came from moving in with a local pastor's family and the religious trauma attached to his sexuality.
Dale ended up marrying his high school sweetheart and had two children before coming out as gay at the age of 27. He discusses having a victim mindset because he was so focused on what he "lost" vs what he had in front of him. He had a positive support system that came into his life around the time he was struggling with coming out, but focused on the negative, leading him down a path of homelessness for 9 months. He then admitted himself into a rehab facility to hopefully undo the childhood and religious trauma attached to his sexuality.
After leaving the program, he attached himself to a man and got engaged after two weeks. He admits he struggled with looking for people to "save" him vs learning to save himself. Aiyana shares the most important relationship in life is the one with yourself. She also expressed the importance of allowing people to come back into your life if they didn't accept you the first time. We should have grace for those that might not get it after initially sharing your truth, but learning to walk away if the behavior continues.
Dale speaks about his adopted family and how his father, the local pastor, called his ex wife after speaking his truth, and encouraged her to get tested for AIDS, HIV, and other STD's. After letting them back into his life, several times, his father shared that he was unable to attend his renewal of vows with his ex husband. His father said that didn't mean he didn't love him unconditionally and Dale should be respectful of his father's position in the church. Dale stated that the fact that he couldn't attend ABSOLUTELY meant there were conditions to his love and finally chose to walk away for good. In that moment, Dale chose himself in hopes of living an honest and authentic life, and choosing to surround himself with people that actually cared for him unconditionally.
We should always choose to love ourselves first. If we don't, how can we truly show love to others. They end the episode with a "polished perspective" in hopes that people, regardless of being gay or straight, can allow others to walk in truth. We don't know what our neighbor is going through so learn not to judge just because they seem "different". Just because you don't understand, doesn't mean you can't learn something from that person. Be open! Be love! Be light!
This episode has a shit ton of funny stories attached to Dale and Aiyana's coming out experiences. They highlight the importance of being able to reflect on growth, and find laughter in the trauma, otherwise you end up crying and developing a victim mindset. We have a long way to go and are grateful for how far we have come in allowing people to be true to themselves.
We hope you enjoy!
Dale Perrault - Host
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dale_perrault/
Twitter - https://twitter.com/polishingmyturd
Tik Tok - https://www.tiktok.com/@dperrault21?lang=en
LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/daleperrault/
www.PolishingMyTurd.com
Aiyana Marrero - special guest/co-host
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/aiyanamarrero/
Andres Castillo - Producer
Instagram -
https://www.instagram.com/andresthevenezuelan/
https://www.instagram.com/crushcomusic/
In this episode you'll hear the personal coming out stories from Dale and co-host Aiyana, and the difficulties they faced when making the decision to share their honesty. Dale grew up going to a conversion therapist after his birth family suspected he was gay after being molested from the ages of 3-15. He discusses the difficulty that came from moving in with a local pastor's family and the religious trauma attached to his sexuality.
Dale ended up marrying his high school sweetheart and had two children before coming out as gay at the age of 27. He discusses having a victim mindset because he was so focused on what he "lost" vs what he had in front of him. He had a positive support system that came into his life around the time he was struggling with coming out, but focused on the negative, leading him down a path of homelessness for 9 months. He then admitted himself into a rehab facility to hopefully undo the childhood and religious trauma attached to his sexuality.
After leaving the program, he attached himself to a man and got engaged after two weeks. He admits he struggled with looking for people to "save" him vs learning to save himself. Aiyana shares the most important relationship in life is the one with yourself. She also expressed the importance of allowing people to come back into your life if they didn't accept you the first time. We should have grace for those that might not get it after initially sharing your truth, but learning to walk away if the behavior continues.
Dale speaks about his adopted family and how his father, the local pastor, called his ex wife after speaking his truth, and encouraged her to get tested for AIDS, HIV, and other STD's. After letting them back into his life, several times, his father shared that he was unable to attend his renewal of vows with his ex husband. His father said that didn't mean he didn't love him unconditionally and Dale should be respectful of his father's position in the church. Dale stated that the fact that he couldn't attend ABSOLUTELY meant there were conditions to his love and finally chose to walk away for good. In that moment, Dale chose himself in hopes of living an honest and authentic life, and choosing to surround himself with people that actually cared for him unconditionally.
We should always choose to love ourselves first. If we don't, how can we truly show love to others. They end the episode with a "polished perspective" in hopes that people, regardless of being gay or straight, can allow others to walk in truth. We don't know what our neighbor is going through so learn not to judge just because they seem "different". Just because you don't understand, doesn't mean you can't learn something from that person. Be open! Be love! Be light!
This episode has a shit ton of funny stories attached to Dale and Aiyana's coming out experiences. They highlight the importance of being able to reflect on growth, and find laughter in the trauma, otherwise you end up crying and developing a victim mindset. We have a long way to go and are grateful for how far we have come in allowing people to be true to themselves.
We hope you enjoy!
Dale Perrault - Host
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dale_perrault/
Twitter - https://twitter.com/polishingmyturd
Tik Tok - https://www.tiktok.com/@dperrault21?lang=en
LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/daleperrault/
www.PolishingMyTurd.com
Aiyana Marrero - special guest/co-host
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/aiyanamarrero/
Andres Castillo - Producer
Instagram -
https://www.instagram.com/andresthevenezuelan/
https://www.instagram.com/crushcomusic/
Previous Episode
"Let's Talk Shit About Losing A Child"
1 RecommendationsIn this episode, you'll meet Shannon Conn. Shannon began a non profit organization after the passing of her daughter Kristina Conn. Kristina was diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis at 6 weeks old and lost her battle with CF on October 3, 2015. Kristina was 21 years old. She had the most amazing personality. Her laugh was contagious. She lived life each day as if it were her last. She smiled through the pain and wanted to be treated "normally" even though she was living with a terminal illness. She loved having a positive impact in her local community, giving back to homeless individuals and local families in need at Christmas, which was her FAVORITE holiday, and fundraising for CF in hopes of finding a cure.
Shannon felt compelled to keep Kristina's memory alive by giving back to anyone in need. The organization was created to have a direct impact in the families lives that are struggling. Regardless of the struggle, the Kristina Conn Foundation is here to help! You can find out more information by visiting:
https://www.mykcf.org/
Shannon opens up about what it's like to grieve the loss of a child and how she was able to pick herself up. She continued moving forward by keeping Kristina’s mission alive. This is an emotional episode with hope for what is yet to come. Enjoy!
"Polishing My Turd" Producer - Andres Castillo
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/andresthevenezuelan/
Band Insta - https://www.instagram.com/crushcomusic/
Shannon Conn - Kristina Conn Foundation
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/kristinaconnfoundation/
Website - https://www.mykcf.org/
Dale E Perrault:
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dale_perrault/
Next Episode
"Let's Talk Shit About Polishing My Turd"
In this episode you will hear Dale solo. He explains what ultimately led him to "polishing his turd". His brutal honesty is unparalleled, but needed at a time like no other. Living an authentic life is key and Dale shares his favorite quote, "Integrity is the willingness to surrender everyone and everything, for one priceless jewel, to know within, I did what was right". Hope you enjoy!
Dale Edward Sullivan, Driver, Kiefer-Perrault
Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/dale_perrault/
Email:
[email protected]
Andres Castillo, Producer
Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/andresthevenezuelan/
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