S4E3: Logic vs. Emotion with Dr. Alice Shikina
07/22/22 • 60 min
In this episode, Bryce and Misbah talk to Alice Shikina. She’s a negotiation coach & mediator. She is very comfortable in high conflict situations. She keep your logical/reasoning mind engaged, while keeping your emotions as calm as possible. Her calm and gentle, yet firm demeanor truly pulls parties toward a mutually agreeable solution.
She has several years of experience mediating landlord/tenant disputes and neighborly disputes, divorcing couples to get to a resolution around their children, money and property. Finally, family disputes can be about taking care of aging parents, strained relationships between adult siblings or children. She mediates both litigated cases, such as probate, conservatorship and unlawful detainers as well as conflicts which are not in litigation. She help parties get beyond the emotional blocks and move them to a place where they can come to agreement.
We talk about mediation/negotiation, how to stay neutral, managing emotion during mediation, and much more.
Show Notes:
- (00:00): What is mediation or negotiation?
- (04:37): Staying neutral in a mediation
- (11:35): Amygdala: Definition and function
- (16:40): Managing emotion during a mediation
- (22:06): Therapy vs. mediation
- (28:00): Asking the right questions in a mediation
- (35:28): Don’t ask “WHY” questions
- (40:16): Encouraging people to think
- (43:06): Win-win negotiation
- (46:14): How to deal with the third-party in a mediation
- (50:13): Managing mediation while dealing with your personal problem
- (58:49): Advantages of active listening
How to connect with Alice:
Website: https://www.shikinamediation.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shikinamediation/
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/aliceshikina/
Connect with Bryce Smith:
Instagram: https://geni.us/zuts
Linktree: https://geni.us/UInt
Invictus Mindset Podcast w/ Bryce Smith
Listen on Apple Podcasts: https://geni.us/Azjc4L6
Watch on YouTube: https://geni.us/Awr9
Connect with Misbah Haque:
Instagram: https://geni.us/2m65mE
Website: https://geni.us/cgCJ
YouTube: https://geni.us/7P7yde
YT Channel for Clips: https://geni.us/vEyn
FREE Tools:
Podcast Launch Checklist: https://geni.us/7IKCfRU
Podcast Content Planner: https://geni.us/AgmBZV
Podcast Promotion Planner: https://geni.us/S4YVZB
Services:
Podcast Launch In A Day: https://geni.us/AUb3CKx
Done-For-You Podcast Production: https://geni.us/EkmoLS
Inside The Mind with Misbah Haque
Apple Podcasts: https://geni.us/1ZrQ23y
Spotify: https://geni.us/UwEcT9D
Pod Mahal
YouTube: https://geni.us/68vah
Apple Podcasts: https://geni.us/eEB3Y
Spotify: https://geni.us/cx4fgY
Instagram: https://geni.us/erBq5AI
In this episode, Bryce and Misbah talk to Alice Shikina. She’s a negotiation coach & mediator. She is very comfortable in high conflict situations. She keep your logical/reasoning mind engaged, while keeping your emotions as calm as possible. Her calm and gentle, yet firm demeanor truly pulls parties toward a mutually agreeable solution.
She has several years of experience mediating landlord/tenant disputes and neighborly disputes, divorcing couples to get to a resolution around their children, money and property. Finally, family disputes can be about taking care of aging parents, strained relationships between adult siblings or children. She mediates both litigated cases, such as probate, conservatorship and unlawful detainers as well as conflicts which are not in litigation. She help parties get beyond the emotional blocks and move them to a place where they can come to agreement.
We talk about mediation/negotiation, how to stay neutral, managing emotion during mediation, and much more.
Show Notes:
- (00:00): What is mediation or negotiation?
- (04:37): Staying neutral in a mediation
- (11:35): Amygdala: Definition and function
- (16:40): Managing emotion during a mediation
- (22:06): Therapy vs. mediation
- (28:00): Asking the right questions in a mediation
- (35:28): Don’t ask “WHY” questions
- (40:16): Encouraging people to think
- (43:06): Win-win negotiation
- (46:14): How to deal with the third-party in a mediation
- (50:13): Managing mediation while dealing with your personal problem
- (58:49): Advantages of active listening
How to connect with Alice:
Website: https://www.shikinamediation.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shikinamediation/
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/aliceshikina/
Connect with Bryce Smith:
Instagram: https://geni.us/zuts
Linktree: https://geni.us/UInt
Invictus Mindset Podcast w/ Bryce Smith
Listen on Apple Podcasts: https://geni.us/Azjc4L6
Watch on YouTube: https://geni.us/Awr9
Connect with Misbah Haque:
Instagram: https://geni.us/2m65mE
Website: https://geni.us/cgCJ
YouTube: https://geni.us/7P7yde
YT Channel for Clips: https://geni.us/vEyn
FREE Tools:
Podcast Launch Checklist: https://geni.us/7IKCfRU
Podcast Content Planner: https://geni.us/AgmBZV
Podcast Promotion Planner: https://geni.us/S4YVZB
Services:
Podcast Launch In A Day: https://geni.us/AUb3CKx
Done-For-You Podcast Production: https://geni.us/EkmoLS
Inside The Mind with Misbah Haque
Apple Podcasts: https://geni.us/1ZrQ23y
Spotify: https://geni.us/UwEcT9D
Pod Mahal
YouTube: https://geni.us/68vah
Apple Podcasts: https://geni.us/eEB3Y
Spotify: https://geni.us/cx4fgY
Instagram: https://geni.us/erBq5AI
Previous Episode
S4E2: Assume Positive Intent
Show Notes:
- (01:50): Advantages and disadvantages of social media
- (09:45): API: Assume Positive Intent
- (17:01): Character vs. reputation
- (26:25): Ask better questions
- (32:57): Understanding complexity
- (37:25): How does failure affect your life?
- (46:22): How to figure out what you want in life
Quotes:
“You are not defined by your job title, you're not defined by your function, you're defined as a human.” - Bryce ‘
“We're human beings, we're exploring, we're navigating on this floating rock inside some sort of universe.” - Bryce
“API: Assume Positive Intent.” - Bryce
“Wonder leads to better conversation.” - Bryce
“Deal with failure and stick it all the way through.” -Misbah
“There are takers and givers in the world.” - Bryce
“Don't allow your memories to be bigger than your dreams.” - Bryce
“We can adapt so easily to different lifestyles.” - Misbah
“Try a lot of things.” - Misbah
“Know when to quit certain thoughts or a certain mindset.” - Misbah
Connect with Bryce Smith:
Instagram: https://geni.us/zuts
Linktree: https://geni.us/UInt
Invictus Mindset Podcast w/ Bryce Smith
Listen on Apple Podcasts: https://geni.us/Azjc4L6
Watch on YouTube: https://geni.us/Awr9
Connect with Misbah Haque:
Instagram: https://geni.us/2m65mE
Website: https://geni.us/cgCJ
YouTube: https://geni.us/7P7yde
YT Channel for Clips: https://geni.us/vEyn
FREE Tools:
Podcast Launch Checklist: https://geni.us/7IKCfRU
Podcast Content Planner: https://geni.us/AgmBZV
Podcast Promotion Planner: https://geni.us/S4YVZB
Services:
Podcast Launch In A Day: https://geni.us/AUb3CKx
Done-For-You Podcast Production: https://geni.us/EkmoLS
Inside The Mind with Misbah Haque
Apple Podcasts: https://geni.us/1ZrQ23y
Spotify: https://geni.us/UwEcT9D
Pod Mahal
YouTube: https://geni.us/68vah
Apple Podcasts: https://geni.us/eEB3Y
Spotify: https://geni.us/cx4fgY
Instagram: https://geni.us/erBq5AI
Human Evolution Project
Apple Podcasts: https://geni.us/aTviv6
Spotify: https://geni.us/2X1WL
Next Episode
S4E4: Be Gently Disruptive
Show Notes:
- (01:24): Finding connection through podcasting
- ( 11:30): “Iron never lies”
- (16:24): Introvert vs. extrovert: Differences and misconceptions
- (25:35): Build positive attachment
- (34:58): How to develop a positive perception
- (43:06): Doing disruptive change
- (48:35): Rubber band theory: Be gently disruptive
Resources mentioned:
Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain
#298 – Susan Cain: The Power of Introverts and Loneliness - Lex Fridman Podcast
S3E7: What Drives Content Consumption and Buying Behaviors? w/ Jackie Bebenroth
The Art of Noticing: 131 Ways to Spark Creativity, Find Inspiration, and Discover Joy in the Everyday
Iron and the soul by Henry Rollins
Connect with Bryce Smith:
Instagram: https://geni.us/zuts
Linktree: https://geni.us/UInt
Invictus Mindset Podcast w/ Bryce Smith
Listen on Apple Podcasts: https://geni.us/Azjc4L6
Watch on YouTube: https://geni.us/Awr9
Connect with Misbah Haque:
Instagram: https://geni.us/2m65mE
Website: https://geni.us/cgCJ
YouTube: https://geni.us/7P7yde
YT Channel for Clips: https://geni.us/vEyn
FREE Tools:
Podcast Launch Checklist: https://geni.us/7IKCfRU
Podcast Content Planner: https://geni.us/AgmBZV
Podcast Promotion Planner: https://geni.us/S4YVZB
Services:
Podcast Launch In A Day: https://geni.us/AUb3CKx
Done-For-You Podcast Production: https://geni.us/EkmoLS
Inside The Mind with Misbah Haque
Apple Podcasts: https://geni.us/1ZrQ23y
Spotify: https://geni.us/UwEcT9D
Pod Mahal
YouTube: https://geni.us/68vah
Apple Podcasts: https://geni.us/eEB3Y
Spotify: https://geni.us/cx4fgY
Instagram: https://geni.us/erBq5AI
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