Loving Men while Dismantling the Patriarchy with Author Sonora Jha

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10/25/23 • 45 min

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What would you do if you weren’t afraid of failing? Dr. Sonora Jha., essayist, novelist, and professor of journalism at Seattle University, is the embodiment of this very question. From forsaking math and sciences growing up in Mumbai, to entering the male-dominiated field of journalism, to writing the memoir “How to Raise a Feminist Son'' and the novel “The Laughter” (which is told from a white male perspective), today’s guest has consistently defied societal expectations. True to her life story, Dr. Jha doesn't mince words. She fearlessly dives into charged topics like 'patriarchy,' 'white supremacy,' and 'the male gaze,' revealing how these forces influence both societal norms and our personal choices.

Prepare for a fascinating, honest and insightful conversation that touches on love, feminism, identity, how we tell our own stories, and so much more, including:

How discovering the freedom to fail allowed Dr. Jha to explore her passion for storytelling
The challenges of working in a male-dominated field
The harsh truths about the 'having it all' mythExploring the crossroads of white supremacy and colonization and their impact on education, culture, and our personal choices
Dr. Jha’s journey writing from the white male perspective in "The Laughter" and how it became a vehicle for truth and self-expression as a brown woman
The revelation that we're all unreliable narrators in our life stories and the complexities of human perception and storytelling
The challenges of being a woman of color in a relationship with a conservative white man, exploring the intricate dance of love and politics
Rediscovering the beauty in the institution of marriage and choosing love over fear in our daily lives and relationships

OUR GUEST: Sonora Jha, PhD, is a renowned essayist, novelist, and journalism professor at Seattle University. She's the author of 'How to Raise a Feminist Son,' 'Foreign,' and 'The Laughter.' Sonora's op-eds and essays have graced publications like the New York Times and The Establishment. With an extensive background in journalism, she's taught writing at prestigious institutions like Hugo House and Hedgebrook Writers’ Retreat and serves on the boards of Hedgebrook Writers’ Retreat, Artist Trust, and Hugo House.

Want more Dr. Jha? Find her and her books online at https://www.sonorajha.com/ and follow her on:

Instagram: @sonorajha1
Facebook: @sonorajha
Twitter: @ProfSonoraJha

Want more Hotter Than Ever? Find us online at www.hotterthaneverpod.com and sign up for our mailing list! Follow us on:

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We’d love to hear what you think about the show - tell us what stories are resonating with you. DM us on Instagram and write us a review on Apple Podcasts!

Prepare for a fascinating, honest and insightful conversation that touches on love, feminism, identity, how we tell our own stories, and so much more, including:

How discovering the freedom to fail allowed Dr. Jha to explore her passion for storytelling
The challenges of working in a male-dominated field
The harsh truths about the 'having it all' mythExploring the crossroads of white supremacy and colonization and their impact on education, culture, and our personal choices
Dr. Jha’s journey writing from the white male perspective in "The Laughter" and how it became a vehicle for truth and self-expression as a brown woman
The revelation that we're all unreliable narrators in our life stories and the complexities of human perception and storytelling
The challenges of being a woman of color in a relationship with a conservative white man, exploring the intricate dance of love and politics
Rediscovering the beauty in the institution of marriage and choosing love over fear in our daily lives and relationships

Want more Dr. Jha? Find her and her books online at https://www.sonorajha.com/ and follow her on:

Instagram: @sonorajha1
Facebook: @sonorajha
Twitter: @ProfSonoraJha

Want more Hotter Than Ever? Find us online at www.hotterthaneverpod.com and sign up for our mailing list! Follow us on:

Instagram: @hotterthaneverpod
TikTok: @hotterthaneverpod
Youtube: @hotterthaneverpod
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090728330453

Follow Hotter Than Ever wherever you listen to podcasts so you never miss an episode!

We’d love to hear what you think about the show - tell us what stories are resonating with you. DM us on Instagram and write us a review on Apple Podcasts!

Previous Episode

The Lies We Tell Ourselves That Keep Us Stuck with Life Coach Lauren Zander

“What do you think will happen first, world peace or the end of lying?”

Lauren Zander, CEO and founder of The Handel Group, was a life coach long before being a life coach was a “thing”. Forget the clichés; Lauren's trademarked coaching technique, the Handel Method, isn't about hand-holding—it's about getting sh*t done. She's taught it at prestigious institutions like MIT and Stanford Business School and counts celebrities, CEOs, and entrepreneurs among her clients.

In this episode, Lauren takes the wheel as your personal life coach to expose the truths we're afraid to confront. First stop: our culture, which, let's be real, thrives on lying. But Lauren's on a mission to change that. She'll lay out why we're all so prone to being “pleasey” (especially women!), the role behavioral epigenetics plays in our life choices, and how self-sacrifice leaves us high and dry. We also discuss:

Lauren’s journey from being an environmental studies graduate to becoming a life-coaching guru
Behavioral epigenetics and why knowing your family history is like holding the treasure map to your future
Why we're trained to lie, and how it holds us back, making us feel like we're imposters
Unmasking the origin of people-pleasing, the invisible puppeteer that hijacks our desires
The concept of parallel relationships—you don't have to agree and overlap on everything
Lauren dissects the three main voices in our heads: the chicken (fear), the brat (self-sabotage), and the weather reporter (judgment and commentary). Learn how to master these voices, drop the excuses, and step into authenticity
Why doing what we know will get results feels like trying to move mountains and why big achievements aren't microwaveable
The power of transparency and authenticity in coaching. Lauren believes in laying it all out, and she's got the results to prove it

OUR GUEST: Lauren Zander is the Founder and CEO of Handel Group®, a renowned life coaching company. She's the creator of The Handel Method®, taught in over 35 world-class institutions like MIT, NYU, and Stanford Graduate School of Business. Lauren is the creator of Inner.U: Learn to Human Better®, the online coaching course that teaches the entirety of The Handel Method. With two decades of coaching experience, Lauren has empowered countless clients, including top executives from companies like Vogue and AOL. She's also authored "Maybe It’s You," a practical guide to achieving your life goals. Lauren's expertise has been featured in The New York Times, Forbes, and more.

Want more Lauren Zander? Find her coaching company online at https://www.handelgroup.com/ and follow her on:

Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/laurenzander_coach/
https://www.instagram.com/inneru.coach/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/laurenzander

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Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090728330453

Follow Hotter Than Ever wherever you listen to podcasts so you never miss an episode!

We’d love to hear what you think about the show - tell us what stories are resonating with you. DM us on Instagram and write us a review on Apple Podcasts!

Next Episode

Single Moms! Have a Sex Life! with Writer Rebecca Woolf

“I don’t believe in rules.”

Rebecca Woolf is a rule-breaker: she doesn't believe in following society's cookie-cutter definitions of motherhood. In this unapologetic episode, she takes us on a journey through her life as a mother who fully embraces her sexuality and autonomy. Just like we say at the beginning of each episode, Rebecca has not only broken the rules in her own life, but also found her path to being freer, happier, sexier, and more self-expressed.

Rebecca's path to this point is unconventional, and she's here to share every raw, honest, and sexy detail. With an award-winning personal blog, "Girl's Gone Child," her Substack “The Braid,” the column "Sex and the Single Mom" on Romper.com, and her memoir "All of This," Rebecca has shattered the rules and redefined what it means to be a single mom.

In this episode, Erin and Rebecca dive headfirst into the intricate world of motherhood, sexuality, and self-expression. Together, they unpack:

Why it feels scandalous to be a mom writing about sex in our culture and what we can do to challenge those beliefs
What it means when someone tells you you're "more than just a mom" and how it robs us of thinking of moms as multifaceted humans.
Navigating parenting as a single mom: being both mom and dad, and the complexities of bringing new partners into one’s life
Why blended families shouldn't always be the goal - there are other options beyond falling back into conventional relationships
The liberating power of creating a shame-free home

OUR GUEST: Rebecca Woolf, a personal essayist since her teens, is renowned for her award-winning blog, "Girl’s Gone Child," and essays featured in Refinery29, LitHub, Entertainment Weekly, Huffington Post, and more. She writes the column "Sex & the Single Mom" on Romper.com and “ The Braid" newsletter on Substack. Her published works include "Rockabye: From Wild to Child" and the best-selling memoir "ALL OF THIS: a memoir of death and desire." Based in Los Angeles, she shares her life with her son and three daughters.

Want more Rebecca? Find her and her writing online at https://rebeccawoolf.com/ and follow her on:

Instagram: @rebeccawooolf
Twitter: @GirlsGoneChild

Want more Hotter Than Ever? Find us online at www.hotterthaneverpod.com and sign up for our mailing list! Follow us on:

Instagram: @hotterthaneverpod
TikTok: @hotterthaneverpod
Youtube: @hotterthaneverpod
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Follow Hotter Than Ever wherever you listen to podcasts so you never miss an episode!

We’d love to hear what you think about the show - tell us what stories are resonating with you. DM us on Instagram and write us a review on Apple Podcasts!