Hindsight is Horrifying - The Evil Dead - Episode 0135

The Evil Dead - Episode 0135

10/28/19 • 90 min

#Hindsighters, the Halloween Spooktacular continues amidst movies and shows that scare, delight, and disturb. On this particular episode, Darth and Jason join Meg and Young Adam in discussing The Evil Dead, one of the most iconic Halloween films of all time.

“I’m an artisanal cheese maker and my husband binds books made of human flesh that he sells on Etsy. Our budget is $4.8 million.” That’s Darth and Jason’s fan theory as to how Dr. and Mrs. Knowby wound up with such a fabulously creepy cabin in the woods of Tennessee. It takes real money to ensure your home is properly haunted.

It’s all about the bizarrely chipper Deadites in this camptastic cult classic, where spirits possess innocent weekenders for reasons that simply aren’t clear. Regardless, The Evil Dead is still a better movie than Halloweentown.

Darth and Jason are avidly against reading aloud, especially when the book in your possession is penned in human blood. Of course, they realize that you can’t shoehorn logic into a film that includes tree rape. #ArborealDespoilment.

Speaking of which, The Evil Dead is infamous for several reasons, including its legendary practical effects. Where else are you going to see oatmeal and Alka-Seltzer explode from a once-human body? This movie provides visuals you never knew you needed until that first glorious time that you saw Bruce Campbell slathered in corn syrup. This film was not one of Darth’s favorites, but if you believe Meg and Young Adam (who appears in his own spooky podcast), The Evil Dead is “the quintessential Halloween movie.” Whether this film makes you want to laugh or cry, Darth and Jason are here to discuss it, so curl up beneath your favorite book shelf and “join us”.

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The Evil Dead: “Join Us!”

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Previous Episode

The Conjuring - Episode 0134

The Conjuring: “She’s Already Gone...and Now You’re All Gonna Die.”

What’s a violent ghost in comparison to an upside-down mortgage? In the continued exploration of what will frighten Darth to the very depths of her soul, we discuss The Conjuring, one of the highest grossing horror movies of all time.

The Conjuring takes place in a time when your diagnosis was embarrassingly published on your prescription bottle and television static still existed...

We apologize, #Hindsighters, but Darth can’t really go on with these show notes. She tried to make this movie funny, but it was simply too scary for her chicken self.

That being said, she’ll leave you with a few questions and lessons from The Conjuring:

Ron Livingston can beat the hell out of a copier, but not a ghost? What the hell?
Blindfolding the Seeker makes Hide ‘n’ Seek (and Quidditch) so much more exciting.
How do you create a friendly haunting?
Exorcisms are like horcruxes; they take a lot out of you.

The ultimate life lesson from The Conjuring, you ask? If you ever try to harm their dogs, Darth and Jason will go full Killer Whale on your ass.

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Next Episode

Sleepy Hollow - Episode 0136

Sleepy Hollow: “Their Heads Were Not Found Severed. Their Heads Were Not Found at All.”

Adam Sandler and Tim Burton both wear shoes. You heard it here first. You also heard the wildly disappointing rumor that Alf is inexplicably returning to television. Stay tuned for updates on this devastating possibility. Though Darth and Jason have ZERO proof, Michael Eisner is suspected.

Ichabod Crane is breathtakingly handsome in this haunting universe where mystery abounds and the Headless Horseman is simply a through line in a murderous inheritance scam.

Despite Tim Burton’s alterations to this famous folklore, Sleepy Hollow lives high up on the Alf to Seinfeld Scale. As a matter of fact, Darth and Jason value Sleepy Hollow over Beetlejuice. Deal with it.

There is so much to love about Sleepy Hollow. We have Miranda Richardson as a colonial Bond Villain. There is the awing presence of Professor Dumbledore, Uncle Vernon, Alfred, and Principal Rooney. Tim Burton built a town from scratch and Christina Ricci makes an appearance.

Above all, Darth Jader personally appreciates these three special aspects of the film:

Skewed preferences be damned.

The burning question about this movie remains: Did Christopher Walken or Darth Maul play the Headless Horseman better? Neither of them speak throughout the movie, but people wind up cut in half wherever Ray Park appears. Darth and Jason can’t help but admire that.

This is the final installment of our Halloween season, but don’t lost your head, #Hindsighters. More episodes to come.

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