The Friendship That Faces Comparison and Envy (Christine)
07/30/24 • 57 min
When Shasta met Christine, a fellow author and speaker, she was everything Shasta wanted to be: she had just published a book, she’d been interviewed on TV, and she had a press kit. Shasta was green with envy. We’ve all been there—a friend has more money, goes on cooler vacations, is happily in love while we just went through a breakup. We wish we had their job, body, house, or relationship. It’s inevitable to feel jealousy and envy sometimes, but how do we make sure our feelings don’t jeopardize our friendships? Today, Shasta and Christine dish on all the icky emotions they’ve experienced and share how they’ve been able to get back to a place of peace. They also reflect on how they’ve been able to be candid about their envy while keeping the friendship feeling positive. Finally, Shasta teaches how to distinguish between the different types of jealousy and envy so that we can choose the wisest response.
In this episode, Shasta and Christine answer the questions:
- What is the difference between jealousy and envy?
- How can you distinguish between unreliable and reliable jealousy?
- How do you cheer for a friend when you’re feeling envious of them?
- How can envy lead us to personal growth and empowerment?
- When you’re feeling envious, how can you shift your mindset to a more positive one?
- Should you tell your friend if you’re feeling envious of them? How can communicating about envy or insecurities deepen your relationship?
Ask Shasta your questions & connect with other listeners on our Mighty Networks community!
Join Shasta’s mailing list to be the first to know about upcoming episodes, friendship coaching, trips, and more: https://www.shastanelson.com/mailing-list.
Resource Links:
- Learn more about the Inner Mean Girl in Christine’s book: Reform Your Inner Mean Girl: 7 Steps to Stop Bullying Yourself and Start Loving Yourself
- Christine’s other books on self-love, personal leadership, well-being, and burnout: https://christinearylo.com/books/
- Listen to Christine’s podcast
- Take the Frientimacy quizzes: Positivity Quiz, Consistency Quiz, Vulnerability Quiz
- Learn more about the Frientimacy Triangle, and jealousy and envy in friendship, in Frientimacy: How to Deepen Friendships for Lifelong Health and Happiness
- More of Shasta’s books on belongingness and human connection:
- Learn more about Shasta’s CoachingCircles
Connect with Shasta on her other platforms:
When Shasta met Christine, a fellow author and speaker, she was everything Shasta wanted to be: she had just published a book, she’d been interviewed on TV, and she had a press kit. Shasta was green with envy. We’ve all been there—a friend has more money, goes on cooler vacations, is happily in love while we just went through a breakup. We wish we had their job, body, house, or relationship. It’s inevitable to feel jealousy and envy sometimes, but how do we make sure our feelings don’t jeopardize our friendships? Today, Shasta and Christine dish on all the icky emotions they’ve experienced and share how they’ve been able to get back to a place of peace. They also reflect on how they’ve been able to be candid about their envy while keeping the friendship feeling positive. Finally, Shasta teaches how to distinguish between the different types of jealousy and envy so that we can choose the wisest response.
In this episode, Shasta and Christine answer the questions:
- What is the difference between jealousy and envy?
- How can you distinguish between unreliable and reliable jealousy?
- How do you cheer for a friend when you’re feeling envious of them?
- How can envy lead us to personal growth and empowerment?
- When you’re feeling envious, how can you shift your mindset to a more positive one?
- Should you tell your friend if you’re feeling envious of them? How can communicating about envy or insecurities deepen your relationship?
Ask Shasta your questions & connect with other listeners on our Mighty Networks community!
Join Shasta’s mailing list to be the first to know about upcoming episodes, friendship coaching, trips, and more: https://www.shastanelson.com/mailing-list.
Resource Links:
- Learn more about the Inner Mean Girl in Christine’s book: Reform Your Inner Mean Girl: 7 Steps to Stop Bullying Yourself and Start Loving Yourself
- Christine’s other books on self-love, personal leadership, well-being, and burnout: https://christinearylo.com/books/
- Listen to Christine’s podcast
- Take the Frientimacy quizzes: Positivity Quiz, Consistency Quiz, Vulnerability Quiz
- Learn more about the Frientimacy Triangle, and jealousy and envy in friendship, in Frientimacy: How to Deepen Friendships for Lifelong Health and Happiness
- More of Shasta’s books on belongingness and human connection:
- Learn more about Shasta’s CoachingCircles
Connect with Shasta on her other platforms:
Previous Episode
The Friendship That Withstood Having “Nothing in Common Anymore" (Sher)
After years of friendship, Shasta and Sher found themselves in two completely different places: Sher was a stay-at-home mom, whereas Shasta didn’t have kids and was more focused on her career. Sher was married to a pastor, while Shasta was questioning church. Sher was more conservative-leaning, and Shasta was more liberal. The question arose: “If we met today, would we have become friends?” It’s a familiar experience—someone’s no longer single, or has kids, or switches jobs, or you’re just in different life stages. And you wonder, was that the only thing holding your friendship together? In today’s episode, Shasta and Sher discuss how they saved their friendship when they realized they had nothing in common anymore, why it was worth it, and the unlikely key to their survival.
In this episode, Shasta and Sher answer the questions:
- How can you revitalize a friendship that’s lost its shared interests or commonalities?
- How can having “nothing in common” actually benefit your friendship?
- Is it worth staying friends with someone you have nothing in common with anymore? Why?
Connect with other listeners on our Mighty Networks community!
Join Shasta’s mailing list to be the first to know about upcoming episodes, friendship coaching, trips, and more: https://www.shastanelson.com/mailing-list.
Resource Links:
- David Brooks’ book on feeling seen & seeing others: How to Know a Person
- Take the Frientimacy quizzes: Positivity Quiz, Consistency Quiz, Vulnerability Quiz
- Learn more about the Frientimacy Triangle in Frientimacy: How to Deepen Friendships for Lifelong Health and Happiness
- More of Shasta’s books on belongingness and human connection:
- Learn more about Shasta’s CoachingCircles
Connect with Shasta on her other platforms:
Next Episode
I'm the Friend Who Regrets Giving Up on Us
Today’s episode features Shasta and three women who share one common, difficult experience: each has deeply regretted losing touch with a close friend. Throughout the episode, they reflect on the impact of these lost relationships, and share the importance these friends once held in their day to day lives. Shasta offers valuable advice on how to reconnect with lost friends, providing guidance for anyone navigating similar feelings of loss towards a once-meaningful friendship.
Ask Shasta your questions & connect with other listeners on our Mighty Networks community!
Join Shasta’s mailing list to be the first to know about upcoming episodes, friendship coaching, trips, and more: https://www.shastanelson.com/mailing-list.
Resource Links:
- Take the Frientimacy quizzes: Positivity Quiz, Consistency Quiz, Vulnerability Quiz
- Learn more about the Frientimacy Triangle, and jealousy and envy in friendship, in Frientimacy: How to Deepen Friendships for Lifelong Health and Happiness
- More of Shasta’s books on belongingness and human connection:
- Learn more about Shasta’s CoachingCircles
Connect with Shasta on her other platforms:
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