Free Spirit Academy Podcast

BREAKING THE SPELL OF WHO WE THINK WE "SHOULD" BE.
"The idea of perfection in a body is a lie. It’s a lie that’s been sold to us since we were little, through magazines and television shows. We fell under the spell. We never had a chance. The spell is made more potent the more perceptive you are as a kid, noticing the hypocrisy and feeling the meaninglessness behind so many of the norms of this world, feeling the meaningless that comes with living in a culture that values production and profits more than it values life. So, how do we move through it? By not dreaming anymore." - Marlena Torres
In this inaugural episode of Free Spirit Academy, I introduce myself and my dear friend, nutritionist and astrologer Marlena Torres.
Marlena and I talk about learning to care for and feed the body with intention but WITHOUT being a crazy person about it...
...how astrology took Marlena from obsessive dieting to listening to her body.
...how just RELAXING is far more supportive when learning to listen to the body vs. obsessing over every little symptom or detail.
...and how knowing about your full birth chart is a purely positive thing - you won't find out that there's anything wrong with you, you'll only learn how to work WITH what's natural to you.
Books and websites mentioned:
The Raw Food Detox Diet by Natalia Rose
Diets, Women, Neptune, & The Full Moon in Taurus by Marlena Torres
Women, Food, and God by Geneen Roth
Marlena's website.
Marlena's private Facebook group.
Free Spirit Academy website.
Free Spirit Academy courses.
Free Spirit Academy Facebook group.

I was thinking recently of how many posts I almost held back because of how self-absorbed they sounded:

• I've talked about how I once couldn't bear the thought of dying without having lost weight and lived in my “dream body”.

• I've talked about how my whole world revolved around trying to fix and improve myself.

• I've talked about the years of obsession with food, healing, and becoming my “best self”. It sometimes feels nauseating to show this part of my experience. But after years of work with clients, I know I far from alone in my experience. Trauma can make our worlds incredibly small.

When life in our bodies is so continuously overwhelming, it's easy to pin all our hopes for a 'fix' on one thing.

But as long as we're trying to fix what we perceive to be wrong with us, we're not listening. We're not present in the bodies we have now. Which again, if the bodies have now feel painful to inhabit, this is totally understandable.

Often the first work I do with someone when we're talking about food struggles or a painful body image is just...gentle embodiment. Supporting them in feeling a little safer in their current body. There's a time for mirror work, even sometimes gentle affirmations, but if we're not IN our bodies, or if life feels like it's on hold until we're "fixed"...those tools have limited use.

Whatever state your body takes, whatever transformations you go through, you deserve to feel safe and worthy of love where you are.

LINKS:
Reimagining the Body 30-Day Course (use the coupon code REIMAGINE2023 for 50% off in the month of November!)
Work with Rande
Free Spirit Academy on Instagram

YOUR BODY IS ON YOUR SIDE WITH ALIYAH WASHINGTON.
If you've been listening since early on this year, you'll have heard Aliyah on episode 2, sharing her journey through anorexia and today we go much, much deeper. I actually split this episode into two parts as it got long but I didn't want to cut any of it.
As I've merged topics like eating disorder recovery with potentially extreme lifestyles and practices like colon cleansing and juicing, I've worried that folks could take things to an extreme and I've tried to be very careful about how I've approached these subjects. One of the biggest things we talked about in this conversation was how disordered eating often begins in a simple desire to just FEEL BETTER when we're in so much pain and discomfort. And because we're in so much pain and discomfort, many of us tend to reach for the most extreme version of the most extreme thing whether it's long fasts or technically perfect diets but without context or transition or embodiment. And I see this happening in the world of exploring spirituality where there are so many trying to "crush our egos" or "overcome our shadows" or we're jumping into long meditation retreats or taking ayahuasca over and over again - and again, I think that some of this stuff is a natural reaction to wanting to be out of the pain that we're in. But truly, it's gentle steps - and becoming curious about and understanding of our ego or our shadow or our painful habits - that will really begin to shift our experience sustainably and allow us to grow rather than chasing our tails and constantly starting over.
When I approached the idea of this interview I wanted to call it something like "how to be spiritual or how to cleanse without being crazy" - and I ultimately decided that as catchy as it was it was a little harsh - and I ended up calling it "your body is on your side" because Aliyah and I created a program with that same name. We created it with the idea that freedom is so much more than just being free to eat whatever you want or being a certain size or being comfortable at whatever that size is. We introduce the idea that your body is actually your best guide in navigating this human life and that there is so much beyond the surface of food and weight pain. This is a course you can take anytime at your own pace and I'll leave the link below as well as links to Aliyah's other offerings!
You'll hear us talk about...
...Holistically addressing mental, phyical, and spiritual health IN THE LONG RUN.
...Aliyah's history with anorexia that began with being a very sick child and wanting to feel better.
...How you think you

should feel on any particular diet or healing regimen vs. what you're seeing in reality.

...How we can begin making everything in our world right including our emotions, our symptoms, and any way our body reacts.
...What's going on when we feel we're eating perfectly and not getting better or losing weight.
Links:
Perception Trainers Website.
Perception Trainers YouTube Channel.
Aliyah Mystery School.
Your Body is On Your Side Course.
Free Spirit Academy website.
Free Spirit Academy courses.

What I wish I would have known when I was struggling and reading books about "mindful eating":
- Slowing down isn't a tool to make you eat less. It's a tool to notice what's happening.
- No amount of mindful eating is going to make eating less than you actually need serve you.
- Mindful eating doesn't have to be precious. You can eat in front of your favorite show. You don't have to be deeply meditative about it...it's really just in the case of compulsive or binge eating that removing distractions can be a useful tool.
- If you're absolutely desperate to change your body, attempts at mindful eating are probably still just going to be attempts at control.
- Mindful eating isn't just about the "mind". It's an embodied experience. It's not about an idea of how much you SHOULD eat, it's about getting to know your actual body.
- "Embodying a binge" really does mean "embodying a binge". What does a binge urge feel like in your body? What changes as you start to eat? What does the food actually taste like? What's it like to have this food take up space in your body? If shame comes up, what does THAT feel like? What's it like to breathe into it rather than let it spin stories in your head? What happens in your body if you don't immediately distract yourself after a binge? If you don't plan to starve yourself the next day? Can you get to know those feelings?
Binge eating taught me so much. Rather, EMBODYING the experience that I'd been fighting with for 15+ years taught me so much.
As it became safe to embody the entire experience of a binge, it started loosening it's hold.
It also became safe to change things from the inside of that experience.
I learned I could stop shaming myself and "starting over" when the binge was over.
I learned I was actually capable of stopping somewhere in the middle rather than being all-or-nothing.
Eventually I learned that a binge urge (the survival energy driving me to eat) wouldn't kill me if I didn't follow through. Or if I did so in a less checked-out way.
Basically I learned that I was lovable and safe, even in a pattern that felt like the worst thing about me. ⁣
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And creating that kind of safety opened up room for other hidden parts of me to come to the surface. Embodying the binge was just the beginning.⁣
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P.S. I have a couple of spots for private clients and all clients get lifetime access to Free Spirit Academy courses (including Binge Freedom) DM me with questions, book a 15-minute call, or fill out the application through the link below ❤️
Work with Me

COMING HOME TO YOUR BODY WITH REGISTERED DIETICIAN AND SOMATIC NUTRITION THERAPIST TRACY BROWN.

Some people just seem to be born for what they're doing and I feel that way about Tracy. She's been guiding people in healing from disordered eating and dieting for the last 12 years and it wasn't because she had a lifelong dream of doing this - it was because she couldn't find solutions for her own disordered eating struggles until she was at enough of a rock bottom that she sort of discovered them herself. We'll talk about that story right up front and of course she's had an incredible amount of training and skill-building since her initial discoveries but I found her journey so interesting because of that. She and I both agreed that talking to a therapist did us little if any good and it wasn't until we really got into an embodied EXPERIENCE that we really started to see shifts. What I find even more remarkable about Tracy's journey is that she embraced a non-diet, body positive approach before the phrases "intuitive eating" or "body positive" were really a thing.

You'll also hear us talk about...

...Ideas about "normal eating" and why becoming an intuitive eater might make you anything but normal.

...The idea that intuitive eating will lead to "perfect" eating and why that isn't true.

...How to decode thoughts like "I feel fat" and what they might REALLY mean.

...How to listen to the language of the body.

...and the differences between INTUITIVE eating and ATTUNED eating.

I hope you enjoy this conversation with Tracy Brown.

LINKS:

Tracy Brown Website.

Free clarity call with Tracy.

Free Attuned Eating guide.

Stop Bashing Your Body Free Gift and Audio.

Non-Diet Counseling Skills.

Free Spirit Academy website.

Free Spirit Academy courses.

Free Spirit Academy Facebook group.